The fall of 2016 marked 20 years since my younger sister passed away from complications during child birth. Due to the fact that she died so quickly I never got to know her. It wasn't until I was around 4 or 5 that me and my brother were told about her. We had been placed in a foster family when my biological mom was pregnant. She was addicted to marijuana and had continued to smoke while pregnant which possibly cost my sister her life. My sister was buried in a graveyard in a town where none of my family members live. And for several years she was forgotten about. No one talked about her or visited her grave. During last summer my aunt was working in the town where my sister was buried. So she went to the grave and saw that it was in a horrible state. No one cared for her grave or cleaned it up from time to time. My aunt now pays for it to be kept in a good shape. A couple of weeks ago my brother and I set out to visit her grave. When we arrived at the graveyard it was dark out and snow everywhere. None of us knew where the grave was. We were relying on memories from over 15 years ago. We spent several hours trying to find it. We called several family members asking for directions but none knew. When we finally got ahold of my aunt we had given up. We didn't find it and we went back home. Is it wrong of me to feel so sad about a person that technically never were born? A person I never got to meet or see. All I ever got to know about her when I was young was that her name was Jennifer.

I was never really a religious person even as a child. My parents didn't want to push their religion on me. But there was one time when I went to church as a kid that I will never forget. We were at the church to light a candle for my sister. When the priest asked who we were lighting candles for. My mom told him that it was for my sister. The priest asked me if I knew the song Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. I did ofcourse know it. He then told me that whenever I look up at the stars my sister is somewhere up there in heaven looking down at me.

Its now been 20 years and still the mere mention of her name can almost instantly bring me to tears. This picture is a tribute to her. No matter what ever happens in my life and no matter where I am. I can always look up at the stars and remember her and I know that she knows that I love her deeply and that she is missed.

Picture by  BabyStar