It's my mood and feeling for now.
After I got a last piece of truth it hit me hard that the one I love , I can proud to declare my love and the only one who said he love me with all his heart just use me as a toy to kill a time till his ex coming back.

I knew I make a mistake but I'm ready to fix it for him but now.....just after his ex back he just dump me like a trash.

It's like I'm falling into a dark deep hole now.