FA+
Shop
365
Views
Views
11
Favorites
Favorites
Category
Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 100 x 100
File Size 92.6 kB
Report this content
More from fromthedead
Listed in Folders
My contribution to the Thursday Prompt first annual (probably, just rolling with that for now) Holiday Gift Exchange.
My mark, I mean target, I mean victim, I mean...
This one is a gift to
SilentBeast.
As always, please check
ThursdayPrompt for more.
I know
said keep it to five pages... I went overboard again. In my defense, I had wrote up two separate stories for this one and kept them each to a max of five pages. (Does that count?)
Attempt #1 - Dedicated to Silent for being one of those generous enough to keep up with this tale since I started it over a year ago and also helping me to write it up by giving random bits of inspiration for it.
Attempt #2 - The actual gift piece I wrote up for Silent. I hope you find it done well enough, Silent.
Happy Holidays all.
My mark, I mean target, I mean victim, I mean...
This one is a gift to
SilentBeast.As always, please check
ThursdayPrompt for more.I know
said keep it to five pages... I went overboard again. In my defense, I had wrote up two separate stories for this one and kept them each to a max of five pages. (Does that count?)Attempt #1 - Dedicated to Silent for being one of those generous enough to keep up with this tale since I started it over a year ago and also helping me to write it up by giving random bits of inspiration for it.
Attempt #2 - The actual gift piece I wrote up for Silent. I hope you find it done well enough, Silent.
Happy Holidays all.
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 100 x 100px
File Size 92.6 kB
Once more, Troy continues his journey... You should create a folder of these. I've read I think 3 of them and they are quite interesting, but don't know where to start or how to find them all.
The fisherman's tale was quite nice. Good deeds are returned. It brought a smile to my face.
The fisherman's tale was quite nice. Good deeds are returned. It brought a smile to my face.
My plan is to post one big story for Troy's adventure when it's finished and the end is only about two chapters away that I might just lump into one big chapter and combine it with all his other shorts. I can still see about setting up a folder that includes his pieces in the meantime. I really appreciate that you have interest in Troy's story; it's been fun to put together.
I'm glad you thought that the fisherman's tale went well, I wasn't too sure about it so hearing you seemed to like it means a lot.
Thank you much for taking the time to read through them both, it's greatly appreciated.
I'm glad you thought that the fisherman's tale went well, I wasn't too sure about it so hearing you seemed to like it means a lot.
Thank you much for taking the time to read through them both, it's greatly appreciated.
Ah, I think that it doesn't qualify as breaking the rules, lol. And after reading two now stories with Troy if I am correct, does he really just wander like that for eternity? XD It seems actually so funny, lol. Of course it's just my reaction for some reason, not any opinion about it. I like the concept and I'm curious what might be next.
And second one was interesting too! A fun tale of fisherman.
Happy Holidays!
And second one was interesting too! A fun tale of fisherman.
Happy Holidays!
I'll take it, thanks! It certainly might seem like an eternal struggle for Troy, but I've already got plans for the conclusion. I'm glad that you seem to enjoy his little adventure.
Thank you very much for going through these, much appreciated and Happy Holidays to you too.
Thank you very much for going through these, much appreciated and Happy Holidays to you too.
Attempt 1: Why must you always leave me hanging? Troy can't have had a nightmare if his ordeal in the old house actually happens.
Attempt 2: I think it was done well enough. You made me think the whale has a mutation because of the pattern. I also wonder if there are three of them because of the geysers. I'm hopeful the fisherman makes it home.
Attempt 2: I think it was done well enough. You made me think the whale has a mutation because of the pattern. I also wonder if there are three of them because of the geysers. I'm hopeful the fisherman makes it home.
Attempt 1: Don't worry, the ending is coming up very soon, more or less just waiting on the right prompt word for it.
Attempt 2: I'm thrilled to hear you thought I did well enough! Perhaps I could work on my descriptive details, but I was trying to describe an orca. Also, yes, my thoughts were that the first was joined by two more whales. And don't worry about the fisherman, he should be fine now.
I'm very glad to hear you seemed to enjoy them. Thank you very much for all the inspiration you gave me while drafting up Troy's story; I hope the conclusion (when I finally get it out) is at least satisfactory.
Attempt 2: I'm thrilled to hear you thought I did well enough! Perhaps I could work on my descriptive details, but I was trying to describe an orca. Also, yes, my thoughts were that the first was joined by two more whales. And don't worry about the fisherman, he should be fine now.
I'm very glad to hear you seemed to enjoy them. Thank you very much for all the inspiration you gave me while drafting up Troy's story; I hope the conclusion (when I finally get it out) is at least satisfactory.
I find story #2 somewhat confusing. You say the man is on his boat, a familiar place, but then describe things as if he was in a strange place. "He found himself on the deck", etc. Also, you describe him staring at the creature "mesmerized...with apathy in his eyes."
How can you be mesmerized and not care at the same time?
I'd advise you to be careful with words; if you don't know the meaning, look it up.
Not trying to be harsh, but to help you improve. Keep up the good work.
How can you be mesmerized and not care at the same time?
I'd advise you to be careful with words; if you don't know the meaning, look it up.
Not trying to be harsh, but to help you improve. Keep up the good work.
I appreciate your input very much. I do tend to hold out on some of the more important details at times, but I'm glad things made sense in the end.
I see your point with the mesmerized/apathy. Perhaps 'an apathetic trance' would have been more appropriate in this case. Don't worry, though, if I am even slightly uncertain on a word's meaning, it is an immediate trip to the dictionary for confirmation.
I hadn't really given any thought to the fisherman's name since I'm just bad with making up names and even when he did finally have someone to talk to, I didn't even give him any dialogue. Perhaps giving him a name could have added some impact to his overall adventure, but I just didn't see much point in this case.
All in all, thank you much for taking the time to read over it, very much appreciated.
I see your point with the mesmerized/apathy. Perhaps 'an apathetic trance' would have been more appropriate in this case. Don't worry, though, if I am even slightly uncertain on a word's meaning, it is an immediate trip to the dictionary for confirmation.
I hadn't really given any thought to the fisherman's name since I'm just bad with making up names and even when he did finally have someone to talk to, I didn't even give him any dialogue. Perhaps giving him a name could have added some impact to his overall adventure, but I just didn't see much point in this case.
All in all, thank you much for taking the time to read over it, very much appreciated.
In all honesty, the closest thing to inspirations for me are the writers on this site. I use to love reading as a kid, but I got burnt out on reading through textbooks by university and only picked up trying to write to entertain myself and, hopefully, others (that is to say, I wasn't really influenced by any big names like Stephen King or anything like that).
I apologize if that isn't what you were really looking for, but I'm afraid I don't really have much else in terms of an answer to that question as I had never really given it much thought.
I apologize if that isn't what you were really looking for, but I'm afraid I don't really have much else in terms of an answer to that question as I had never really given it much thought.
I'm glad to hear that Troy is going to have a conclusion to his wanderings, the poor guy deserves it!
And the second story was well done, good deeds have their own reward, and karma certainly helped out. One thing though, do they still hunt orcas and especially in the modern day? Also I'm going to have respectfully disagree with Seffstark below, the main character didn't really need to have a name, in fact it might have been out of place giving him one.
And the second story was well done, good deeds have their own reward, and karma certainly helped out. One thing though, do they still hunt orcas and especially in the modern day? Also I'm going to have respectfully disagree with Seffstark below, the main character didn't really need to have a name, in fact it might have been out of place giving him one.
Troy's probably looking forward to a break; traveling this long road is starting to get a little bit much on the legs.
I'm grateful you thought the second story went over well enough. I could be wrong about this, but I think Japan is still big on whaling, or at least it was for a time if no longer. Assuming that's true, perhaps orcas are not necessarily the primary targets for whaling, but I knew that Silent liked orcas so that's just what I went with. All in all, had I given it a little more thought then perhaps I would have left that bit out and the fisherman could have used a tool on his ship as a makeshift iceberg trimmer.
I'm very grateful you'd take the time to read through these, thank you very much for that.
I'm grateful you thought the second story went over well enough. I could be wrong about this, but I think Japan is still big on whaling, or at least it was for a time if no longer. Assuming that's true, perhaps orcas are not necessarily the primary targets for whaling, but I knew that Silent liked orcas so that's just what I went with. All in all, had I given it a little more thought then perhaps I would have left that bit out and the fisherman could have used a tool on his ship as a makeshift iceberg trimmer.
I'm very grateful you'd take the time to read through these, thank you very much for that.
Comments