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When one seeks to become a gryphon rider, they must complete a task that proves they have the discipline and tenacity to complete the journey. Taming a gryphon is no simple task, and all youths need to show they at least understand this.
Again, this is a short story that turned into an unfinished novel some years ago.
Again, this is a short story that turned into an unfinished novel some years ago.
Category Story / All
Species Human
Size 120 x 106px
File Size 79.3 kB
Listed in Folders
Watch your tags, some examples needing fixed below
or?” The boy i
Eslor said, “He t
rs.’”
m.’” Eslor responded.
"The thought of beginning one’s gryphon rider training at sixteen was ludicrous. Still, he
was the prince’s protector, and this meant certain parts of their life were synchronized. Their
proving day and beginning of rider training were two examples. " This is all telling nad needs refined.
"His father’" Not capitalized
Watching repeating as sections. That large paragraph can be split in at the fall and up in the tree, Prince Eslor. Beware repeating Ceahnor sentences. With paragraphs every change in character action and change in speaker like in the final paragraph.
(with a longer cross guard and handle) Eh not here... borderline pointless, if it is important, than it does not need to be in ().
A good start though, A adventurous with good relationships gleaned in the family.
Always room for more description too. You have plenty of space for it in your mundane tags. but I thin you should explore this as it can be a good tale for younger audience.
or?” The boy i
Eslor said, “He t
rs.’”
m.’” Eslor responded.
"The thought of beginning one’s gryphon rider training at sixteen was ludicrous. Still, he
was the prince’s protector, and this meant certain parts of their life were synchronized. Their
proving day and beginning of rider training were two examples. " This is all telling nad needs refined.
"His father’" Not capitalized
Watching repeating as sections. That large paragraph can be split in at the fall and up in the tree, Prince Eslor. Beware repeating Ceahnor sentences. With paragraphs every change in character action and change in speaker like in the final paragraph.
(with a longer cross guard and handle) Eh not here... borderline pointless, if it is important, than it does not need to be in ().
A good start though, A adventurous with good relationships gleaned in the family.
Always room for more description too. You have plenty of space for it in your mundane tags. but I thin you should explore this as it can be a good tale for younger audience.
Thanks for the feedback. As of right now, this old setting and the narratives associated with it are left sitting as much of the content was later cannibalized for another setting. That said, the idea of this being for a younger audience strikes home and definitely something I'll remember.
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