"I'm not angry, I'm just disappointed"
How to shoot through someone's heart.

I feel ya its the WORST thing you could hear when you were young

still hurts when your an adult too :(

I can really relate to this and understand

Meanwhile in my house
"How was your day"
"I SAW SOMEONE GETTING THE SNOT BEATEN OUT OF THEN IT WAS FUN CAN I GO AGAIN NEXT YEAR"


Joking aside I know the feeling of just sitting there waiting for punishment it is hell on Earth

"I'm so disappointed, next time bite and use your claws some, little snot probably deserved it."

You call your dad Sir? I thought that was a strictly American thing...

It's also often an army thing. Particularly when being in trouble....at least in my house.

I heard sir/ma'am being used in US military families, but not in US civilian families.

It's rather common the further South you go... particularly in the midsouth and southeast. You won't see it much in the North.

It USED to be that way all the time. It's called 'RESPECT.' Plus, at least here in the States, many fathers actually served in the military, even after WWII and Korea.

Simple "Mother", "Father", "Mom" and "Dad" are also respectful and not nearly as subservient as Sir and Ma'am are. What's disrespectful is calling them by their first names.

Just think of it more like a language thing. In some dialects of English, "sir" is just the formal/respectful form of address for your dad (as opposed to "father" or whatever else you may see used). Kinda like how in Spanish the word "pendejo" can be a crazy offensive insult or a term of endearment depending on which area of the southwestern US/Mexico/peru you're in.

Oh I'm well aware. I can see it as a neutral respectful honorific, but also see the point with the people that enforcing it probably is putting too much dominance to the parent/child dynamic. My dad was in the U.S. Navy and retired as a Lieutenant, and even he didn't make us call him Sir. Dad would, however, never allow a first-name basis with him or my mother. Since we've grown he's relaxed a lot of the parent/child stuff and doesn't mind being our friends, probably because he'd been estranged from his own father for decades and didn't want the same thing happening to us. Take that as you will, I know a lot of people believe that someone cannot be both a parent and friend to their child because it undermines parental authority, and I can definitely see that being an issue until they're adults.

As to being friends with a parent, my Mom is, and always has been, my best friend. It didn't impact her ability to be a parent one bit, however. I think, no, I KNOW, my Mom is a rare breed.

I could never even begin to think this about my father however.

Strange. I came from a USMC family but never faced this. I learned to respect the titles of "Mom" and "Dad" and that was the end of it.

Mine too infact belt was over use and wed get extra if we didnt say sir or ma'am. And yea ii still hear the im disappointed in you... infact sadly i honestly cant remember a single time my folks have ever told me they was proud of me. Guess they just assume i can tell when they proud or something

I don't call my dad "Sir". I just call him dad. Even when I got in trouble I never called him "Sir".

I actually never heard that from the army families I know (not counting my own family because they were all drafted in when they got into the military except perhaps my grandfather but there this could also be the case)

But perhaps this is more common in english countries than here in germany.

Maybe it was somethng my dad had growing up cause his dad (my grandad was a bit of a dick...actually quite a lot of a dick) but he was also SAS and treated my dad really super strict...so maybe it just passed down from that?

Being a dick is one thing, but the terms 'sir' and 'ma'am' isn't about the military, or that. It's about respect, about recognizing that your parent, or even people you don't know, but interact with, are in a position that should be respected.

All of my life, even before serving in the Military, I've called people 'Sir' and 'Ma'am.' They didn't have to be in the military, or anything like that. They just might be five years older than I am, that deserves the term. I refer to people who are younger than I am, but in a position above me, as 'Sir' or 'Ma'am'.

These terms go back generations, and people who are older than most of you here use them without even thinking about them, it's just part and parcel of the way us 'old people' were brought up.

As society has decayed, these 'honorifics', which is what they are, have disappeared from society, resulting in a freedom, or at least a familiarity one person to another, that is not deserved, or appreciated.

The world might be a nicer, more civilized place if we treated each other with respect, dignity and honor. All too often, I look around, and don't see that happening, and I've been seeing that for far too long.

This 'lack of honor' towards others began in the 1960's, before so many of you were born, or for some of you, even before your parents were born. It accelerated through the 70's and 80's and has been passed down from parent to child. This is why that most people today don't use the terms, they haven't been taught to.

That could be the case. My grandfather (he died when I was around 3 so I only have second hand sources about him) was in the Wehrmacht (dont exactly know what he was. I once heard he was a "Fallschirmjäger" (paratrooper) and other times heard he was a normal soldier.) and lost a leg in Poland and what I heard he was also a pretty strict man and even while my father grew up as kind of a hippy he had still some mannerism of him. As we will learn from our parents how we raise our kids they learned it from theirs.

But I think one other diffrence is proberly the mentality. Here in Germany the military hasnt that much respect as it might be the case in britain and defitnatly not as much as in the US so you dont use military language very often (except some sayings that are mostly sarcastic slangs)

My dad was a paratropper, my grandad was SAS and my dad was never good enough for my grandad because my dad never made the SAS so my grandad always thought very little of my dad. Strangely my grandad also lost a leg but much later in life due to wear and tear from being SAS his body was a mess so they sawed his leg off. He seemed quite happy about that *shrugs*

I feel for your father, Sammy. My grandfather on my father's side was a laid back kind of guy. Give him a game of golf, and a bit in the 19th Hole afterwards, and he was a happy camper.

On the other hand, my grandMOTHER was a holy terror. My father, as an only child, took a heavy hit from her, and it significantly damaged him. I didn't come to an undestanding of this until well after she passed. But, the damage she did to my father was manifested in how he treated his own children. He became, was, and is as much of a terror as his mother is, and for that, I despise him.

I hope that your Dad isn't like your grandfather. I hope that he's more like Peter.

That's a phrase that chills any kid to the bone. Punishment is one thing, but knowing you let someone down that badly? It kills you.

Star... because your mother and Manda are so alike?

uh oh. Not unexpected, but ... poor Star.

I love the facial expressions on this page.

From the looks she takes a lot of her looks from her dad it seems, but that aside I remember such things, I would hide in my closet personally

Interesting experience.

I would've thought that an army dad would have approved of standing up for yourself, then again, maybe not for a girl to do it?

standing up for yourself sure, but resorting to violence as a first point of action, no.

i have had a talk with my father (a navy man) who once said to me "dont be the one to throw the first punch, it makes you as bad as them, but do defend yourself."

"Don't throw the first punch, but after your last, make sure no one's standing except those fighting with you!"

Star's actions at the party were wrong. Yes, I get she was provoked, but she responded in a way that was inappropriate.

HOWEVER, we need to ask ourselves WHERE did Star learn such actions? The answer to that lays the blame. So, maybe her father and mother need to take some of the blame for her, as well. I just hope that they can see that.

Star didn't 'stand up for herself', she attacked someone, and physically injured them. There is a huge difference. You can stand up for yourself without resorting to violence.

See, I learned the hard way that violence was key.

I was the 'nice' kid. One day I snapped like this and after that I was never bullied again.

Different scenario. I was bullied all through high school, I know what it's like to be beaten up. Of course, I was also an obnoxious asshole.

But, I would never have considered attacking someone for something like this. Granted, if Kyle had physically attacked her, and the parent/adults at the party didn't do anything about it, she would have been more than obligated to physically defend herself.

But, even you said 'One day I snapped. . .', but you didn't just snap the first time someone bullied you, it took a while to get to that point. This is the difference, in this case, Star's trigger is hairline, and that's dangerous. She reacted inappropriately. Violence is NOT key, but it may be a requirement at some point to either prevent future violence or show someone you're not the person they want to be messing with.

A perfect example of that right now in our real world is North Korea. They are pushing, and pushing, and pushing, and one of these days, someone is going to get tired of that and stomp their little asses back into the ground. But, it won't be without longsuffering, at first.

Way too harsh, "Can't even look at you..." cruel...

Nooo you're breaking my heart!!!

i forgot what this page about. good thing i look back and see :) it go show you if you attack anyone there will be a price to pay. from a look of thing she been put to bed with no toy.

now when I was kids and I will say this, I highly don't recommend teaching your kids right and wrong with a belt. it will make them very shy in life and make them fear people. I did fear people due to a belt. being on youtube for 9yrs help me out getting over a fear of people. only use a belt if all fail! what I will do if it is my kids, I take away everything they love and tell them they get back if they are good.

Agreed. It's not the same for every child, but more often than not, physical punishment will only lead the child to growing up being afraid or be more prone to resolving conflicts in a violent manner, because that's how their parents dealt with them. Some advice from a non-parent: Raise your children the way you want them to behave to others. If you spank or beat your child, hand or belt, you are teaching them that violence is a valid solution to everything.

i 100% agree with you on that :)

Having been a child raised on being spanked i can tell you personally I dont think this is true. I would never resort to violence as a valid solution. I also think im pretty polite and considerate to people and generally think of others before myself due to the way my parents raised me. But each person reaacts differently to different methods. Like my younger sister was also spanked (not nearly as much as me) and from the age of 12 she was smoking/drinking and doing all sorts of crazy things and was a complete wild child. So even though we were raised fairly similarly I think social circles play a bigger part than just parenting alone in how someone grows up.

well considering that either way with or without spanks your son can end being a good or a bad person and that maybe "inflicting physical pain" on him may not be the factor of creating a violent person or a brokkenly shy person... then I prefeer to not inflict the pain.. cause he can learn without physical pain too, and pysical pain will not make a diference.

I know both cases people who are extremelly respectable persons and grown by spanks and yells, and people who is completelly crazy, dangerous and don't respect nobody raised with that method (more the second than the first sadly)... and have know cases where it happen the same way but taking out the violence thing (but y my experience, they where less in the violent, overpower and disrespectfull side). If neither of them can ensure a non violent child, then I prefeer to choose the path that doens't harm the child.

I was able to learn without physical pain... and I'm no special superman... just a random person. Everyone is as capable as me to learn throu patience, tolerance, love and reason... you can even punish your child without using the force, and even if some ended being awesome people by the pain, it doesn't means that everybody should be educated by the pain, some awesome and kind people came ffrom the deapest hells in earth, but maybe they don't deserved it, maye they could be that way without the pain... if not.. then we must acept that the pain inflicted by the ones with power over us are in his right of doing so, and that they will end helping us by their abuses (that won't be abuses if we see think this way)... a really dark thing, specially when it didn't got applies universally and some get the belt while other don't resulting in an unfair situation that may end in hate by the victim (child) to the one who punished him in an unfair way (knowing there are other way, that may have work too, or even may have work better).

Just my perspective.

I didn't ever get spanked, I got scelped. & often it would be for something my little sister had done XD. I turned out alright in the end but I did suffer from terrible depression in school. I'm sure the way I was raised had something to do with it.
Bah, I don't understand why anyone would have kids anyway.

Somehow, I suspect the whole "growing up to solve their problems with violence" thing tends to be the result of relying on violent punishments as the first resort, thus conveying the message that violence is the best and easiest solution.

I was spanked all the time as a kid, but nobody who knows me would describe me as anything other than a gentle, loving person who hates violence. Don't believe everything that TV tells you about how spanked kids behave.

That words were even more hurtful as the belt ever could be... I can see a lot of hugging from Manda, Teca and Lure coming in the near future. And maybe from some of the other guests as well

But, before that, here is a little hug from me *hugs little Star*

I can honestly agree, being spanked was nothing compared to having someone you look up to say how disappointed they are with you, I had that, only it was my uncle

I understand this pain so much. Though my father really got a little over zealous with the physical punishment. I think it's partially his fault why I have anxiety and freeze up in almost any conflict with anyone I view as a person in power.

can we get away from the backstory now? :C

It's her story to tell, I don't think she's gonna change it's order just cause someone asks ya know

I know it's just getting so sad ;A;

Ya this page was heartbreaking still it's pages like this that really make ya connect with a character

ya, i almost cry see this but it is a story. i am sure that babystar is really a nice person in real life even knowing I never saw her in real life. some time artwork and profile can tell a lot what this person may be like.

Both me and beta have met her in real life she's as nice as they come

:) cool. i know there some people i love see. a lot of them is from youtube. maybe 1 day i get lucky. but before i go see anyone. my school loan got to go :)

I know that feel

Theres only been three pages of backstory. I said there would be four so just be patient kay.

will do, Starry ;w;

Ouch I so agree That is the most painful kind of punishment.

And this, THIS is why I said in a previous submission that I never, EVER use the word "disappointed" in reference to the child. I have trouble even thinking it in terms of "disappointed in your behavior" (or "behaviour", across the pond)

To add on to it that he's having trouble even looking at her, though? (growl) This pops out my claws and makes my palms itch. I want to take that belt and shove it so far up Peter's arse he tastes leather.

"Star, honey... come here for a snuggle, baby. (pats her lap, her wings enveloping the girl as she comes close, shutting out the world.) There is nothing here for you but love and acceptance, and pride in the furson you are, sweetheart."

Auntie Shelley

Disappointed sounds like an understatement to me. Shocked, horrified or ashamed would be more appropriate.

How about finding out her side of the story? No one has yet asked STAR what happened, only taken someone else's version of it. I'm not opposed to spanking when it's needed. There are times that nothing else reaches into a child's mind and gets their attention, however, it's not to punish. It's to get their attention so you can teach them something and they'll listen. It's the difference between punishment and discipline. (hint: the word "discipline" comes from the same root as the word "disciple", one who learns.)

An analogy we'll all be familiar with is when the computer goes wonky. What do the tech support people tell you? Turn it off and then back on. It resets whatever is wonky and the computer starts "thinking straight" again. It's not a perfect analogy, as the computer has no will of its own and doesn't get lost in emotion like people (especially children) do.

The most important part, though, is that after you have to spank, you comfort. In BDSM, it's called "aftercare", but with parent/child, it's just love. You make sure the child knows she is loved, unconditionally, that it's only the behavior that needed correction.

=^.^=

I expect Star's brothers got a similar treatment after that dangerous ride down the stairs in a box that hurt her head.

Shelley, a couple of things.

The last two panels of the page look to be one panel. I'm pretty sure her father is looking directly at her in panel 6, and her tearful expression is in panel 7.

As to finding out Star's side of the story, at least when I was growing up, if such an incident occurred, the parent was told the details when they picked the child up. So, Mom would at least know, and I'm sure she told Star's father.

On to the rest of your response, you have very much hit the nail on the head. Allow me to expand on what you've written.

As 'disciples', or ones who learn, we have to start out with Doctrine. Someone lays down the law, or the rules. In the Bible, Ephesians 6:1 clearly lays down the doctrine for children. "Children, obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right." Plain and simple, obey your parents. It adds 'in the Lord' so that a child has the ability to determine if the parent is giving correct doctrine or not. It's a check system. If the parent says 'You can go out and do murder, and destroy property, and riot' and do all these other things, the child will hopefully learn that this is not 'in the Lord' and the child will not follow that doctrine.
So, a child is expected to obey their parents, for this is the right way to do things. That, in and of itself, puts total responsibility for the actions of the child on the parent. If the parent raised them correctly, the child will not do wrong things, or, they will not break doctrine.
Now, of course, we know that children don't always do what they are told to, it's part of parcel of what a child is like. Tell me any always angelic eight year old, and I'll call you out as a liar.

So, what has happened? Our hypothetical 8 year old has failed to follow doctrine. How the parent responds depends on the child. We talk about being disciplined, and to be disciplined is to follow a specific teaching or doctrine. We speak of scientific disciplines. The same thing applies here. Our child has failed to follow specific teachings and doctrine, and now needs to be set straight. We, as parents and adults, may do nothing more than correct the child by saying 'This is what the doctrine says, this is what you did, you were incorrect, please do not do it again.' The child may respond by saying 'Thank you, I see the error of my ways, and I will attempt to correct them. In a fantasy world!

Normally, you'll get 'I'll do it my way, you can't make me do it your way.' Then, we can apply the Biblical 'Rod of Correction.' Over the years, that has been so blown out of proportion, and turned into belts, paddles and other forms of physical injury and punishment, but that is NOT what it was, or why it was designed. A modern day equivalent is a small wooden spoon. The 'Rod' may be applied to the back of a child's hand. If they are misbehaving, a simple request to hold out their hand and a 'tap' on the back of the hand will draw their attention. In many cases, even the request to hold out the hand will bring remorse, and in some cases tears, because of the realization that they did do something wrong.

The 'tap' is nothing more than an attention-getter. Simply put, you want to have the child focused on YOU and your words to the child. Once the child's attention is on you, you'll repeat the doctrine, and then add the correction necessary for the child to return to the doctrine. That usually happens until the next time.

For example, you get home and your child is revved up, and is running around the house. The doctrine is 'Stop running!' The doctrine may be repeated more than once, with the possibility of consequences. 'Stop running before you break something!' If the child does not stop running, then they are in direct defiance of the doctrine 'Children, obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right.'

Now, the parent may physically stop the child, and apply the rod of correction and reassert the doctrine.

However, let's say the child, after the second warning, continues to fail to heed the doctrine, and in fact, something does get broken.

Now, we can discipline the child with proper doctrine, i.e., 'I told you to stop running, and you did not, and now, you have knocked over my laptop, and it is broken.'

We now may proceed to a punishment phase. I abhor violence, and as long as the parent can keep their cool, the punishment may go something like this.

'You have failed to listen when I told you to stop, and you have now broken my laptop. As punishment, you will be confined to your bedroom when you get home from school Furthermore, your phone, music player and television will be removed from your room. I will also be taking your laptop to replace mine.' This is punishment, a result of failure to follow doctrine. It is NOT discipline, in any way, and those who say that spankings are discipline are wrong. There is no physical violence here, but I'm sure out hypothetical child is now going to be in significant remorse over losing her phone, music, television and communications/games/etc. For how long this may go on, of course, is up to the parent, but you can bet the child will think about the next time when someone says something to them.

Star's doctrine before leaving for the party was 'Be on your best behavior.' She even knew it well enough that her mother did not have to tell her. She failed to do that. In many families, particularly when I was growing up, the concept of 'Wait for your father to get home' was reserved for only the worst occurrences, and Mom was often the person to mete out discipline and punishment.

Story, as an example. My mother was a Den Mother for a bunch of Cub Scouts. My mom used to terrify the Pack Leader when she would call him to say she wanted to do this or that with the kids. She took them on a working Coast Guard cutter, she got them tours of hospitals, and even took them flying! All the kids wanted to be in my Mom's Den because she was 'sooo cool!'
They went to Battleship Cove http://battleshipcove.org/ for a trip. This trip was three states away, so it was a full day's trip. There were other mothers along as supervisors. My Mom had a warning system. She simply said 'One' for the first warning, 'Two' for the second warning, and there was no third warning. If you got to three, action would be taken.
This was one of the first trips my Mom took with these boys, and while they had been told the system, had never fully seen it. It is easy to get lost on one of these huge floating cities, and the boys were running ahead and not listening. They got the 'One' and a warning that they needed to stay together and not run off. That did not stop them, they continued running off. They got the obligatory second warning, with the added caution that if they reached 'Three' they would be immediately taken off of the ships, put in the cars, and be brought home. Apparently, they didn't believe her. They go to Three.
Immediately, all were gathered together, the culprits pointed out, and they were all told that they were now heading home. Of course, the begged and pleaded for one more chance, but Mom's reply was 'You had TWO chances after 'One' and you blew them!' They were brought home.
Now, I didn't attend this particular event, but I did go along as a supervisor on others. From that moment on, when Mom said 'One', the boys fell into line, and stayed there! For new members of the Den, it was made VERY clear to them that Mrs. C does not fool around, and she means what she says! This didn't come from the adults, this came from the other boys. When she says something, listen.
Mom always had compliments where ever she went with these boys about how well behaved they were for their age, even if multiple Dens were involved, you knew who Mom's Cubs were by the way they behaved.

We have lost this knowledge, at least on the majority level. Mothers and Fathers may beat a child, thinking that it will cause them not to do things wrong, or it'll make them a better person. They may also do nothing at all, which leads to a directionless child who doesn't know how or why to act. Parents today are often bad examples to their own children, and children learn from their parents, siblings or others around them.

When Peter looked at Star, he was disappointed in her. He had taught her better, and he expected better from her, and she let him down. A belt spanking would have been easy to administer, and Star probably would have felt better because of it. But, by her own admission, she's a Daddy's Girl, and nothing hurts more than having Daddy say something like that to you. Her reply is really all she could say. She accepted, in one millisecond of time, that she had crossed a serious line, and it was far worse than what she could have imagined.

I imagine, if Peter is the father I hope he is, that the next morning, Star will be asked to join him and Star's Mom at the breakfast table, alone, and Peter will calmly, with lots of love, explain to Star why what she did was wrong. He will offer her the opportunity to explain her reactions, and if Star is as smart as I think she is, even at this age, her response will be 'I was wrong. I responded incorrectly to a situation that caught me off guard, but I was wrong.' They will discuss viable alternatives for the future, the concepts of how a lady should act, and then, as mentioned elsewhere in these comments, as punishment, she will need to ask Kyle over for dinner to apologize to him in person.

I'm guessing that this is Jenny who wrote this reply.

Wow.

You said what you said in a way far "wordier" than I did (which in itself is amazing) and yet you also said it far better.
I'm down with the numeric system of behavior modification; I had it used on me and I have used and continue to use it myself. You made an excellent point in the difference between punishment and discipline, and supported it wonderfully. (A few months ago, another poster here asked why "one. Twooo?!" seems to work so well as to prevent a "Three.", and my response to him was, "It doesn't. The first time." You illustrated that perfectly.)
I'll differ with you still in that Star should have the opportunity to explain her side of it, as the house parent who called her mother saw Star hitting Kyle, saw the blood, and we as parents know that the sight of blood in that circumstance will usually spur a response, and many times, that response is that the person drawing blood is wrong. We also know conceptually that the person hitting *back* is often the only one seen to do so, and the cause may be unknown. Certainly, what happened inside Star's head when she was taunted about "What are you gonna do, cry?" is unknown; no one there knows her or her history.

I still take issue and always will with the use of "disappointed in you" and moreso (though I would not have thought it possible) with "I can hardly look at you." If the one breaks only the child's heart, that's bad enough, but it stands a good chance of breaking her spirit, which you said yourself can destroy her relationships and at a minimum affect her life ever after. To me, this is unacceptable, and I will NEVER use that phrase. I don't tell others they may not do so, obviously, only that I will not, and why. It is theirs to decide how to raise their children and grandchildren. To soften it slightly by saying "disappointed in your behavior" helps only a little. I choose to avoid the issue: "You know better." or even "You should be ashamed of what you did."

I hope that you are correct in how Peter and Lidiya respond to this in the morning. Star deserves to be built back up, to know that she is loved, unconditionally. I hope also that she and Kyle will make mutual apologies. Neither was completely nor solely at fault, IMHO.

Thank you so much for your well-thought-out reply and your thoughts on the subject.

With respect,

Shelley =^.^=

Shelley,
Gary or Jenny is the same person. Jenny, now Gennifer, or Gennie is the side of Gary who wishes to be female. Gennifer is my adult side, Gennie is my baby girl side. I've used GaryandJenny in a lot of places on the web, and it was automatic when I signed up here, but I should have used Gennifer Meredith as my user name. Just didn't think of it at the time.

I agree that Star should have the opportunity to explain her actions, or at least what led up to them. I do not think it would make a difference in how her parents respond to her, however. Star full well knows she was out of line, and what she did was wrong.

As to Peter's comments to her, I wonder if Sam's not recalling a specific incident from her own life as a child. Having had that same thing said to me, I can understand how painful it is (read my other comments on this page). If this is not something she ever heard as a child, she's found an awful lot of people's buttons, that's for sure!

I wonder, 'in the heat of battle', how many parents really realize how much that statement hurts. Yes, the parent IS disappointed, you try so hard to instill your ethics, your mores and values into your children, and then for something like this to happen, it's almost as if their child did as much damage to them as to the person they actually hurt. That pain can work both ways.

Personally, I think a better way to handle is would be something like 'Anastasia, I am so angry right now, but I'm also so hurt by what you did. I've tried to raise you correctly, and you did something like this. I don't know how to handle this right now. I'm too emotionally upset. Go to bed, we'll talk in the morning.' The last thing he would need to say though, is 'I still love you.'

Actually, the following page is just about perfect, and while I hadn't expected Star to do what she did, I think it's perfectly natural for her to do that. I also think Peter's response was absolutely perfect and the situation at that point was resolved.

I totally agree with you.

And my God! I had to laugh at that one part about shoving the belt so far up he tastes leather! God that was funny! XD

I tend to get a bit.... poetic... when I'm upset. Peter might think it funny, too. Until he tasted the buckle.


The second time.

=^.^=

It just seemed out of place. It's all emotional and sad.
Then suddenly it turns into that! XD
It's just funny!

funny story. When I was REALLY little. spanking with a hand did nothihng to me. it never hurt I could just shrug it off and walk away. So they used a wooden spoon insted. that worked. I hid the spoons when I got in trouble.

and also as a 18 year old. seeing that and hearing that. It still hurts you in more ways than one can desribe.

Haha, I also hid all the spoons once and actually got out of a spanking because one couldn't be found.

I feel ya Star, i used to get spanked as a kid as well. Idk if I'd like it now a days though. X3

I sorta hate looking at stuff like this in the age play scene, mainly as it always reminds me of how things were for me growing up. I feel I spent way too much time getting in trouble when I was this young and receiving this sort of response waaaaay too often to were it traumatized me and made me what I am. I truly don't think as long as I'm here I will ever sort of get past the guilt phase of being a little, and needless to say most of my childhood memories are of me in tears, or being afraid of never being a good kid in my parents eyes.

But this is such a great piece regardless though, your art is really something, and even though I said I hate looking at this sorta stuff, with this piece it's a little different. As unlike most artists on this site who just draw for the kink, you always have sort have differed from the lot and put this noticeable depth to your comics story that makes them above the average babyfur read. I also feel a lot of emotion from your work sometimes... especially this one, and very few artists ever usually manage this with me and actually make me reflect back or feel emotions on this sort of level.

I personally really love art that can invoke such a personal response like this, any artist who can is truly something to me, and even though It happens a little more than often than when I first joined, you have done it (I think) the first time, and definitely the most out of any other artist that I complimented thus far for doing it. I also can't even begin to tell how many times in the recent publications of found that I had this happen. Anyways I didnt really intend to write a novel, but I really did just want to write something lengthy and meaningful as I haven't commented on your work in ages and wanted to sort of tell you just how much I still enjoy your work in particular. Don't ever lose your passion girl, your comics have been and always will be my favorite forms of babyfur literature on this site.

Well drawn and phrased it's familiar enough to me
My only comments, cos this a cartoon is I feel a punishment announced but deferred can more traumatic than one that's delivered with you forgiven due to raised expectations and motions.

I can now see where Star got her ambition to join the army.

I only ever got a couple of spankings (was an Army brat too so I knew better heh) but while they hurt, I have to agree hearing your parent disappointed in you hurts so much worse.

The back story bits really do round out the comic though, I've enjoyed them ^^ This page in particular definitely brings back memories of childhood with my hardcore Army dad.

how can u be mad at that face ^^

aww... i can see how this is gonna go...

Is that a new font I see?

I feel so sorry for you, I've been there before it's the most heart breaking thing you could say to a child

I HATE it when parents tell their kids "I can barely even look at you." It just makes me sick. I remember actually kinda losing my temper at a dad chewing out his kid for something that wasn't even their fault really.

I was riding my bike through the park one day and I saw kids getting ice cream from an ice cream truck (something I haven't seen in at least five years) and one little girl kept asking her dad if they could get some and finally he said no and she started pouting. The dad gets pissed and says; "Don't start that shit with me! Your such a spoiled little brat! I can barely look at you!" At this point, the little girl started crying and that just pissed the dad off even more and he kept yelling and swearing at her. If I had to guess, she was about 4 or 5. And finally, the dad actually grabs her and hits her! At that point, I got off my bike and yelled at the guy to back off. He told me to "fuck off" and I told him there was no chance. He turned on me then and tried to hit me. At this point, a crowd had gathered and as I was trying to restrain the guy, someone called the cops and they actually arrested the guy. I guess a neighbor of the girl and her father was there because they knew the little girl and they took care of her and called her aunt. The cops found evidence of drugs and alcohol in the father's system and he was charged with child abuse, substance abuse, child endangerment, and assault. From what I understand, he's two months into an eight month jail sentance and he's had his guardianship over the child taken away. And I'm glad. I remembered telling that guy he made me sick. People like him are the worst.

good work!

Yeah. He was an asshole.

Oh, so much experience with the belt!

My parents were like that. I almost never got hit, but when I really fucked things up.. they told me how disappointed they are and then they gave me the silent treatment for a certain time.
I got fed, looked after, woken up in the morning, sent to bed in the evening...everything ... but no words at all until the time was done.
That was more effective than any spanking.

oh, it is... and that's how we should solve any problem, instead of violence... actually is what we do with jails and things like those... we just ignore them and continue our lives, if the don't want to be good part of the social life and want to cause probles, then they don't deserve to be included. Inflicting physical pain will only make them angry, hatefull and more dangerous (maybe). u.u

I wasn't hit by my parents.. only 1 time in my whole life, and was just 1 soft spank, when i was very little, then never me or my brothers got spanks or any physical pain... but everytime we made something that was not correct, we received a long chat about the pain we inflict in others, and how bad that made us as persons, and how nobody wants bad people... that works... kids are not stupid, they are not animals, you can have a serious mature and racional chat with your kid and he will understand you if you speak with the heart and the reason.

I'm sorry but that's just messed up, when a child needs a parent at an early age and they just flat out ignored you D:

It was effective. And believe me, I fucked up quite badly sometimes ^.^'
And...limited time only. Nothing that traumatized me, don't worry.

I got a mixture of the belt and "I am disappointed" when I was younger. Mainly some form of "I am disappointed" from my mother, while I got both from my grandmother but they usually brought in the comforting phase but still it didn't heal the damage. Feel it was overkill at times because all I was doing the majority of the time was fighting back against bullies, but I can see it justified to some extent for disrespecting adults/teachers which I did a bit too. Still, was horrible because I not only had that to deal with at home but also the mockery and bullying of the kids at school. When I think about it, I'm not too surprised anymore that I was overly aggressive when it came to any of the fights I got into (resorting to using makeshift weapons and any cheap tactics possible to just inflict pain and as I got older, the tactics got worse, which fortunately I was able to hold myself back from going fully through). I was trying to vent my anger in whatever way possible even if it was on another person.

Anyways, this page kind of hit home a bit for me, minus it being my dad being the one to deal the punishment. He faded out of my childhood early on after him and my mother divorced.

I'c have the 'd' word thrown at me a few times. it feels like a stab with words

When you really mess up, the worst thing a parent can say to you is "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed". Seriously, that hurts so much more than any punishment. I wonder if some parents actually know that, and say it to get the point across?

Her father seems like he's a bit of an authoritarian dick.

Oh no....That is sometimes worse than a spanking.

I know that feeling. :(

That's so sad....

Not just "I'm disappointed," but "I can't even look at you." That's gotta cut a hole right through your soul.

Those thick-ass arms make me think he'd be really good at administering corporal punishment, too. Dude's a beast, and not just because he's technically a cat.

My parents were always against hitting kids, they managed to raise my sister and I without resorting to it and my sister was a complete monster of a child :P

AW HELL NAW

No daddy, no. Not the belt. Anything but the belt. I promise I'll behave. Nooooo! Oww, oww, oww, oww, oww. *cries*

That happens yo me every time I'd get in trouble.

Geeze! That last panel just broke my heart!

Did you by any chance do something different with the colouring? It looks somehow different from the other pages...

Wow.. what an asshole of a father, "can't even look at you" what kind of asshole would say that to his own child, also having to call him Sir, are you his daughter or his damn employee..

One who loves her so much. One who looks at his own failure, not hers. That's the kind of father she has.

As to 'Sir', that simply something because he is in the Military, and it is just the way it is. It's also a sign of respect for someone.

I haven't read all the comments, I'll go back later on and read some of them.

I'll tell ya, Sammy, this page put a dagger through my heart, quivering lips and a tear in my eye. I know this experience all too well.

I can only hope that Star's father will allow himself time to cool down. I am VERY sure that her father is actually showing his love of his daughter in this page. He IS disappointed in her, he's tried to raise her better than this. It must be tearing him up inside. In this case, spankings are easy to do, but they don't get to the heart of the issue. I'm still fighting back tears as I write this.

What I can hope for is that the next page will be the next morning, and that Mom and Dad have had time to consider the circumstances and to mete out a suitable punishment, like having to invite Kyle to dinner and stand in front of her entire family and apologize to him. She is the baby sister of three boys, I'm not surprised she doesn't take well to having things done like that to her, but it still comes down to Mom and Dad teaching her that violence is not how we act to provocation, UNLESS there is NO OTHER WAY. Star most certainly had ways out, including not doing anything, and then looking at an adult. Maybe a bit of tear.

I got the belt, I got pounded, I got thrown into walls well into my late teens. In fact, it finally ended when I told my father if he ever touched me again, I would walk down to the basement, load a pistol, and blow his f***ing brains out. I think he finally believed me. My father left such an impression on me that I still barely communicate with the man, and even after I was 50 years old, he scared me enough that when he traveled here to the West Coast for my sister's 25th anniversary, I had a .45 caliber round in my pocket, which I had planned on giving to him, with the reminder that there were eight more that I would deliver rapidly to his head if he ever got into my face again. I never did give it to him, nor did I ever make the threat. I think I finally got over most of it, until within the last year or so, and my life has so messed me up right now . . .

But, this isn't about me, sorry Sam. I know Star's hurt and her pain, it clearly shows. 'Anastasia?' That had to hurt as well.

I wish I could crawl into your comic and hug her and tell her it's okay, she's going to make it and she's going to turn out to be a most wonderful person. You certainly have.

A lot of strong opinions on this page. For everyone up in arms about referring to ANYONE (not just a parent) as "sir" or "ma'am" in an appropriate situation is a show of respect, not necessarily demeaning or "making them feel like an employee".

On a personal note, I can't say my mother ever told she was disappointed in me or that she didn't want to look at me. A few of my family members did often, but that's a whole different can of worms.

Lastly, sorry to kill the mood, but Star left her shoes and stockings at the party.

Mothers have a very good way of knowing what's missing, even when they're angry or upset, possibly seeming more so aware when they are upset or angry. I'm sure Star's shoes and stockings came home with her.

: ( feels bad man

little brat knew it was comming ! my dad used do same thing to me or my whoud snach me by the rist

I'll agree with that. Disappointing my dad was always worse than him dishing out lashes from his belt.

th out just came to mind reading this page
I am the youngest of my family and I never got punished any more servly that a shouting but I know my older sisters did get worse punishments
so is it a normal thing for the youngest to be less punished

As the eldest, I always thought I got the worst, and I watched my sisters seemingly get less and less as it worked down the line. Of course, it might also be that your parents just didn't want to go through the same old same old, or by the time you rolled around, it was more acceptable than it was for your older siblings.

I think the eldest is a bit of a gineau pig experiment...your parents have NOOOOO idea how to parent and the eldest is the test subject to work out what works and what doesnt. its not their fault, theres no defined method on how to raise a child and you kinda just sorta blunder your way through it, but once you've done everything for the first time the second time becomes easier...or certainly a bit less like undiscovered territory. So i think its kinda natural for the eldest to be treated a bit different to the other children

Yup!

That makes sense

"you're a dissappointment" is one of the nicer things I was told as a child growing up by my parents, grandparents, teachers, and fellow kids. Usually all of those mentioned above spared me any kindness by telling me hard truths. Such as telling me how useless, worthless, stupid, weak, and pathetic I am. I used to feel good thinking that they were just being meanies, that they were lying to me. But now I know that they were being kind, they were only speaking the truth, and that for so long i was so unfortunitley blind and ignorant to the sad truth of what I am and always have been.

Worst words in my life are 'you're not going to be anything but a failure!' I can't tell you how that has come back to haunt me now, and I'm almost 60 years old.

I am borderline genius, two points below. My father, as so many parents desire, wanted me to fulfill the full potential of that, since I was tested early. However, he had his own issues from his parents that he never took care of. He's 86 or 87 this year, and still does not know how to treat people properly.

My father's favorite saying to me was 'Unless you buckle down and study, you're not going to be anything but a failure!' It became a self-fulfilling prophecy, aided by his actions and his derisive attacks on me.

I was four years old, I remember this like it was yesterday. I have blocked off so many of my childhood memories, mostly I guess because I don't want to remember them, but this was so destructive, I can't not remember it. I wanted to be read to, Dr. Suess's Cat in the Hat. My father was laying on his bed, I don't know where my mother was. My father would not read this book to me until we did multiplication tables. I was FOUR! The 'simple' stuff, I could figure out, but I could not figure out what 8 x 3 was. I guessed, and the more I guessed, the more I was wrong. My father attempted to use a method of 'connect the dots', so he would ask me what 6 x 4 was. That's easy, it's 24. Then he would ask me what 8 x 3 was. Thirty two? Thirty two, I was pretty sure is what 8 x 3 was. Then, instead of saying that I was wrong, he would go back to 'what's 6x4?' Twenty four. What's 8x3? Thirty two. What's 6x4? Twenty four. What's 8x3? I don't know! What's 6x4?
This went on for 45 minutes. I grew to the point I was crying, and he was 'disappointed' in my. I never did get Dr. Suess read to me that night. Today, 55 years later, if you ask me what 8x3, the first thought in my head is 32! It's automatic, and I have to stop myself and correct myself. In elementary school, middle school and even high school, I messed up simple math problems where that was involved, because it was an automatic answer.

'you're not going to be anything but a failure!' has followed me through life. I failed my first year of high school. I eeked by my second through fifth years, and here I am, IQ two points below genius, and I graduated second from the bottom of my class. I was ridiculed, laughed at, and humiliated. Now, honestly, I should have started school a year later, and I was very late, like 6-7 years late, in maturing, sexually, physically and mentally. That was never caught, either. Finally, a couple of years ago, in my mid 50's, we found out that my testosterone is less than 1/3 of what it should be, and probably has always been that way. Possibly why I would prefer to be female.

SO, I share all of this with you so that you know that people telling you how worthless, useless, stupid and other things they said to you most likely has led you to be exactly those things. Somewhere along the way, YOU need to reparent yourself and change those thoughts to you are unique, you are valuable, you are intelligent, you are stronger than anyone can possibly imagine, since you're still here, and you are here for a specific reason.

I hope that you will be able to do that for yourself.

Sam, your Shine and Found pages often bring out the best, or worst of people.

What do you think when you see comments and stuff like these from your work?

The shadow on the wall behind Star in panel 5! OMG!!

woow, that description of feelings is so accurate, nicely done

OUCH a punishment WORSE than spanking. The heart destroying "im disappointed in you"

Oh my god im crying so bad I HATE the feeling that you let down your family so much as to say they cant look at You...it must feel terrible

My dad did that when I was young! Use a belt!

Bet it got the point across, though.

Which was more effective, the belt or the word?

my dad said calling him sir is disrespectful something i will never understand like another thing that doesn't add up black people don't like to be refered in a group as people yeah life just works that way

In the military, at least it used to be this way, probably still is for new recruits, there are Officers, who are 'Commissioned.' Then, there are enlisted, who are not. Military etiquette says that you will salute and call any Officer 'Sir' or 'Ma'am.' You will not do that to an enlisted, however, if they are higher in rank then you, you may address them with their rank, i.e, Corporal Smith, Sergeant Jones, or Chief Williams.

IF you do address them as 'sir' or 'ma'am' you may get the response "Don't call me 'Sir!' I WORK for a living!' It's a good natured jab at Officers, and a humorous way to remind the errant person of proper terminology. Of course, it's even funnier when you have a new Lt. or Ensign who calls the Chief of the Boat or Command Master Sergeant 'sir' and they get the same reply.

Calling someone sir is not disrespectful, but if that person has worked, scraped, saved and gone to great lengths to provide for his children, the term 'sir' often in society applies to a person of affluence and wealth. A person who has worked hard may find it demeaning to all the work they have done. It is not disrespectful, and I would ask your father for a clarification on WHY he thinks it's disrespectful.

I think it legitimately hurts less to be struck than it does to hear the words "I'm disappointed in you." from anyone you respect.

Was really happy to see the new page...now im sad ...darn

That's rough. Waiting waiting waiting and then he gets home and tells her to wait some more. Still, she's very fortunate for such parents.

I remember one time when I was 4 or 5 my dad got back home late and I'd done something bad (I can't even remember what). He yanked me out of bed by my arm and ruthlessly took the belt to me without a word. I went from being asleep to a confused weeping mess in a matter of seconds.

Everyone, Star cannot be allowed to think beating someone bloody is an acceptable response to annoyance and frustration. Peter has to make sure this lesson sticks. If not, what's going to happen next time she gets mad?

What if it happens again and the parents of the kid sue?

What if she seriously injures or kills the kid (and yes, kids that young have killed without meaning to)?

What if she were to continue this behavior into her teens or as an adult? Prisons are filled with people who never learned this lesson and have to be separated from society because they can't (or won't) stop harming others.

Finally, don't worry too much. We know adult Star and she clearly hasn't been emotionally crushed or become a hollow shell or anything.

Also, the Sir/Ma'am thing varies greatly depending on the region. I was taught to call my mom and dad mom and dad, but other people were sir/ma'am unless the person in question asked you to call them something else. And it wasn't just something kids do with adults, adults are expected to refer to other adults as sir/ma'am unless asked otherwise. It's just considered good manners.

So Star dad is named Peter, is he a Family Guy? LOL

Her crying face just makes me feel things One of the most emotional panels you've drawn, I think...

Ow. Thise are words I wish I would never receive again. Ive had a slipper against my butt once or twice but those words hurt more then anything

hugs yay update!

Having been spanked as part of my own upbringing I can safely say ive never engaged in any criminal activity and im fairly sure i have no mental disorders

truthfully the explanation as to why i was about to be spanked, then the spanking, then the hug and the "we love you very much"....seemed very methodical and it was never done in anger. However the emotional abuse i suffered from my father.....that was waay worse and DID mess me up.

I was spanked quite a bit as a child, I am scared to confide in my parents about so many things, because whenever I think of the outcome, it's usually negative and about 9/10 times, I'm right.

I have been spanked once in my childhood, it was enough to make me behave by fear of future spankings. Honestly, looking at this, Babystar`s childhood flashback is just first world problems, or pointless filler at best, it doesn't really make sense from a narrative perspective since its not traumatizing or character building as she explains its happened more than once to get spanked. Try having your parents verbally fighting in the night, waking you up and making you cry as you feel like in your innocent little heart that you did something to break them apart even tho you did not. And next thing you know, Mom packs her`s and her children 'things pretending their going on a trip while Dad is out hunting for 2 weeks, and they end up living with who she was cheating on.

All I am saying is, make it the first spanking ever, make us see that mind shattering distress in her eyes. Peace out.

Its the first time and only time her father ignored her rather than spanked her. That was more traumatising to her than any spanking would ever be

Point taken. "You always remember the first time"

That and being told that your parent doesn't accept or support you for who you are hurts most of all. I know that pain too well.

*grabs my heart* eek! the feels! "tale of iroh" eat your heart out

For some reason this reminds me of something I saw a long time ago. It was an old postcard I think. In it a little girl was smugly telling her teacher something like "You'd better not write that note. I heard my daddy say that if you send one more note home with me somebody's going to feel his belt on her bare behind."

Peter is the dad, and Alex is the oldest right??? And then Victor is the middle and Matt is the next one/youngest boy and then Star is the youngest right??? But what's the mom's name?????????

I think it'd be really cool to see some family portrait style pictures of the Bryce family through the years/ages!!!! XD





^,..,^\m/)0(




.

Ohh wait or is it::

Victor is the oldest, then Alex, then Matt and then Star???? >3>








^,..,^\m/)0(






.

It still disgusts me that parents whip their kids with belts.

I had a few spanked bottoms, but my family worked out, taking away things that I liked was a good punishment for me.

One of my family members was kind of bullied into spanking me by other family members until they found out it did not work. Threaten to take away my Playstation 1 or just Playstation at the time. Now that worked

Easily the hardest part about reading abdl comics is the traumadumping triggering my own cptsd