Wherein I wonder: If a wizard casts a Fire Arrow spell in a mansion and nobody is attentive enough to acknowledge it, does it make a narrative impact?

For those who are just tuning in, this is a story I wrote when ten years old. As a result, the writing is... bad. Hilariously bad. Let's read!

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Annotations in red. Annotations pertaining to something not visible in plain text are omitted from this transcription

Hot rox IX
The festival


If you think it’s a zoo at your house…

People were soon to come rushing to my house. Because reasons, I guess. It’s a good thing I was prepared for a party because that was exactly what happened (at that time it was 4:30 PM.) We started with games (well, they did. I was fixing snacks.) When I got done at 5:07 I joined the party. I started to set up the snacks. Then I started to eat. This section actually used to be significantly longer. In the original version, ten-year-old me actually tried to tackle themes of domestic abuse and… yeah, it went about as well as you would expect. I usually want the original story to be presented in all its poorly-written, cheesy glory. However, the original version leaves a very bad taste in my mouth and, well… I would rather be able to upload this document without having to precede it with a trigger warning.


Party pooper

At 7:04 someone with a costume that looked just like that wizard came in without knocking. He yelled “Okay, party’s over!” We all laughed. He sent a fire arrow at someone. And then the author promptly forgot about that arrow. I mean, I know the purpose of that was to reveal that it really was the wizard, but even simply having someone barely dodge, or fall over dead, or go “Ow, that was really rude, good sir,” or… anything, really, would be appreciated. Then he made the chess pieces live. I joked around with him by saying “Come on, you know not to introduce wizard’s chess to the muggles.” He said “What’s a muggle?” He obviously hasn’t read the Harry Potter books. I decided to mess with his head. I said “You’re a muggle you muggle! Quit muggling up this room you muggle! I want you to muggle yourself out of this room you muggle. Muggle along now.” Apparently they had read it because they all laughed. I know that the wizard is helpless before the might of Hot rod, but the wizard barely has to even try in order to kill random townsfolk. They do realize that, right? I said “Muggle, this is crowd. Crowd, this is muggle.” Which served as a distraction and Byrd immediately blasted him. I stabbed him. He tried to blast Byrd but I blocked it from hitting her. It was now heading for the wizard. It hit him. Big time knockout. We continued beating him up until he disappeared. “He’s got to be dead now.” I said. Okay, seriously, Team Rocket have more dignity and menace left at this point than the wizard. Also, he disappeared, so logically he cast a spell to disappear, right? Wouldn’t this be a sure sign he’s stil alive? Which doesn’t mean he won’t bleed out when he arrives at his destination, mind, but still…


The ending Considering how short these “books” are, this isn’t saying much.

It was 10:00. The party had ended and everyone was going to bed (except me and Byrd who had to clean up the mess.) boy was it a big party. Everyone in the world must’ve been there (now come to think of it, that’s probably what happened.) I somehow doubt it. Though, if that is the case, that is another point toward Mary-Sueism. Or fifty. we started to head for bed when the phone started to ring. I answered it and I didn’t exactly like what I heard on the other side. The vampires decided to try to kill everyone. Why? If everyone’s dead, whose blood will they suck?