After her induction into the tribe, and the end of her pregnancy fast approaching, Nina is told the truth of Chitani's past and given a difficult choice.

Ok! Second to last chapter here! It's shorter, but important stuff. Lemme know what you think!

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Commission story for  geckoguy123456789

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26 MAY

As we reach the end of May, I know for sure that Spring has finally arrived. Even in this already lush jungle, the world seems to bloom in a way I hadn't noticed before. The birds flit happily through the treetops, the fruit and nuts the tribesmen gather is plentiful and rich in taste. The village seems greener, more sunny, more inviting than it ever has before. Since my induction into the tribe, I've been met with the kindness and generosity I'd observed from afar for so long, and the feeling of acceptance, even love, has brought tears to my eyes on more than one occasion.

What speaks to me most clearly about spring, however, is my own body. I feel as ripe and ready to drop as the fruit. Even since last month and the discovery of my twins, my belly saw fit to grow still larger than before. It was to be expected, of course, with two children nearly grown and ready to be born, but my sheer discomfort was becoming distracting. If I was not already in such a good mood, I'm sure it would have been far more irritating.

In an odd change, one that Daaga calls a final signifier for the approaching birth, my belly has quickly and drastically grown firm to the touch underneath my fur. Though there had always been a hard center to my stomach, my belly skin had become taut and immovable, like it was pulled over a drum. It became sore more often and the nighttime cold was uncomfortable against the thinning fur of my stomach. The twins moved less often, but I could more strongly feel every twitch and shift inside of me when they did. Davi and I discovered the other day, with delight, that the intermittent 'popping' sensation I felt one evening was actually one of the twins having hiccups! But with the way they shoved one another about in my belly, it was becoming evident that they were running out of room.

I started today in one of my new favorite leisure spots: on a tree limb nearly eight feet off the ground. I imagine it be some kind of old-world kinkajou instinct to want to scale a tree the more pregnant I become, perhaps as a way to safely avoid predators when I give birth. I briefly entertained the idea of staying in one of the treetop huts until I went into labor, but I ultimately decided against it. I already feel heavy enough as it is on the ground.
After days of getting accustomed to it, I could comfortably lay along the thick branch, my tail wrapped securely around the wood, and simply relax the day away while occasionally playing with and observing the interactions of the twins in my belly. As I began my final month, Daaga excused me and the other pregnant women of work around the village, allowing us to get some rest before our labors began to hit. However, most uncomfortably, I was told I would have to abandon any lower clothing to allow quick access to my sex should contractions suddenly begin. It was still awkward to walk around completely bottomless, but the Naragaka didn't seem to care.

I had been on the branch since I had woken around noon. It was within eyesight of the hut, so I knew when either Chitani or Davi would come home. Before then, though, I was busy entertaining myself with my own baby-filled belly. The twins had begun to interact with each other again, either pushing gently for more space or perhaps even exploring one another in a kind of rudimentary bonding experience before they'd even left the womb. I liked to think it was the latter, and the idea of being able to feel both of them together inside of me for just a little while longer brought sudden tears to my eyes. I gripped onto the branch under me and simply watched my stomach shift with their movement, every so often tracing a finger over my sensitive skin to feel more directly.

I was too distracted to notice the coming footsteps crunching over the fallen leaves until they were almost directly beneath me. I jumped, almost at risk of losing my balance if it weren't for my tail and paws holding me in place. I craned my head almost totally around to find Chitani standing beneath me, smiling quietly and greeting me with a wave.
“You're back early,” I said. My belly lurched and gurgled suddenly. “Just in time to find the three of us something to eat for lunch,” I added cheekily, hand against my belly.
“I finished quickly so I could return before the others,” Chitani said. “I wanted to speak with you alone.”
“You have me where you want me, then,” I said, groaning as I turned to the side and sat upright on the branch, belly settling in my lap. I patted the branch next to me. Chitani laughed and shook her head.
“I'm too tired to be doing any more climbing today. And women so heavy with children shouldn't be up there anyway!”
“It's not that high!” I countered.

“Then at least do me the courtesy of speaking face-to-face, Nina,” she said, shrugging. I exaggeratedly rolled my eyes and sighed. Taking a deep breath, I grasped the edges of the branch and lowered myself to hang from my arms. The tree had a rough spiral shape of branches that encircled the trunk. Going hand-over-hand, I started to climb down the tree, Chitani following alongside me with her hands at the ready to steady me if I fell. At the lower-most branch, I dropped a few feet and thudded onto the ground. I stumbled once before Chitani caught me and steadied me in place. Sighed, leaning backward to stretch my back raising my belly slightly in the air.

“Perhaps I won't be climbing that tree again with the children still inside me,” I said, smiling. Chitani nodded, smiling.
“Take a walk with me, Nina,” she said, striding forward. “It's a beautiful day.”
“I won't be going very fast, sister,” I said, following along. It was a privilege to be able to use that word and filled me with joy every time I did.
“You don't need to,” Chitani laughed, slowing her pace so we could walk side-by-side.

The two of us strolled comfortably through the underbrush around the village, sticking to the paths countless Naragaka had naturally tramped down.
“How are you feeling?” Chitani asked.
“Full, mostly,” I said, running a hand down my stomach. “At times, completely packed. I'm ready for the twins to be born but...” I paused as I felt a nudge from inside. “...they can take as much time as they need.”
“I didn't expect you to take it so well out here,” Chitani said. “None of us did. We underestimated you, Nina. I apologize for this.”
“Nonsense. You have been like a sister to me ever since I arrived. You've been the only one at my side many times.”
“Because you carried my brother's children. You were family and I was honor-bound to protect you. I loved you all the same, but you surpassed my expectations.”
“Well...it wasn't quite as hard as I imagined,” I said, stroking my belly with my fingertips. “In some ways, at least. And why should I forgive you when it's because of you that the tribe accepts me as one of their own?”
“That was the least I could do. And not for my own sake, either. We're happy to have you as one of us.” Chitani smiled, brushing a strand of hair from my face so we could look eye-to-eye.

We walked a while longer in silence, moving away from the village and toward the river. The daylight shone gorgeously through the canopy and bathed the forest in golden rays of light. The world felt softer somehow, more gentle, as if it was preparing for the birth as much as I was. I didn't know if Chitani knew about Davi's tree near the river, but we traveled near it. Conversation was short and sporadic as we simply enjoyed the company of one another.
“Am I going too quickly for you?” Chitani said, stopping to watch me lumber through the underbrush with a hand on my back. I stopped in place to catch my breath and waved my free hand dismissively.
“No no, it's fine. I just need...a moment's rest...” I leaned against a nearby tree to get some of the weight off of my feet. A hard kick jostled my belly about, causing it to wobble gently as I winced in discomfort. “They're getting strong in there...”
Chitani walked nearer and held out a hand over my stomach to feel, but pulled away at the last second, retracting her fingers.
“I...Forgive me,” she said, quietly. I raised an eyebrow, puzzled at her expression.

“What for? They're your family as well.” I reached over and pulled her hand back onto my belly, sliding it over where one of the twins kicked. I held her palm there, letting her feel the soft movement of her niece or nephew inside of me. I kept my gaze down, guiding her palm to the other side of my swollen middle to where I felt the other baby. There too, I pressed her hand in so she could feel their kicking as vividly as I could. The more I thought about it, I never remembered Chitani asking to feel the babies like many of the other Naragaka did, and she had more of a cause to than the others. It was her bloodline that grew inside me, after all.

I glanced up to find Chitani staring dimly at the ground next to my feet, her eyes swelling with tears. Her face, normally either stone-blank or in a wide grin, was contorted in remembered pain, her teeth gritted together and her free hand balled into a shaking fist. It was like she was in a furious, bloodthirsty battle with her own emotions and determined not to let them win. I let go of her hand against my belly. She let her arm drop heavily to her side. In a quick motion, she turned her back to me and walked a few feet into the underbrush, her arms wrapped around herself and her shoulders heaving with dry, silent sobs.
I stayed quiet against the tree, watching Chitani with a kind of fear I didn't know how to overcome. There was such pain inside such an outwardly strong woman, and I had been blind to it for months. Or perhaps, I would later tell myself, she was simply very good at hiding it. In either case, I finally watched as Chitani suffered underneath memories she had long buried. I wanted more than anything than to pull her into an embrace and let her cry on my shoulder, but it was something about my presence, and perhaps even my pregnancy, that stirred up those emotions in the first place.

After almost ten minutes, Chitani's shoulders fell, her arms relaxing at her sides. She didn't raise her head, but she shuffled through the grass to a large, newly-fallen tree and sat on it. She brought her tail to her lap and began to wring it in her hands. The inaction was killing me and I refused to see my new sister in so much pain without doing anything to help. I shifted my weight back onto my legs and waddled through the underbrush, over the footprints she had made. As I approached her, she didn't raise her head or acknowledge me in any way. I didn't try to press the issue. I simply sat next to her, awkwardly climbing onto the trunk beside her and settling in.
It was a while before she even acknowledged my presence. Though she didn't look up, she let go of her tail and wrapped it around one of my dangling legs. I entwined my own tail around hers like I would do affectionately with her brother. She huffed once in what I hoped was a single laugh. Chitani sniffed and wiped her eyes on the back of her hand.

“...Forgive me,” she said, her voice throaty and hoarse. “I…I did not expect this to...” She sighed shakily, her hands balled up in her lap. “Seeing you this way...it reminds me too much of...when I was with child...”
I paused, not sure when to speak next.
“...I didn't know you were...” I started to say before the words died in my throat. She shook her head quietly without looking up.
“You wouldn't have,” Chitani said. “It's not something easily spoken about.”
I sat in silence, not sure what to say next, or even if I should. I felt guilty about my gravid body, about how excited I was to have my babies, while she was going through so much pain inside. She sighed again before speaking.

“It was many years ago. Davi was not old enough to remember much. It had been long enough after our parents died that our pain had been healed by time. I came of age and wanted to bring happiness back to our family. So I found a mate and became pregnant during my first mating season as a young woman.” She shook her head and squeezed her hands together. “From the beginning I knew something was wrong. I was sick longer and harder than the other girls, the baby didn't seem to grow as big or as fast as he should have. It...I….” Chitani sniffed again, rubbing her eyes before real tears could start again.
“My time came...too early. Far too early. I sent Davi out to find Daaga while I suffered in our home. When she came, she would not let him inside. The birth was...agony. I cried all night, knowing that something was wrong, that my...my baby was...” She paused to swallow. “The baby was born alive, but he was sickly. He...did not finish growing. Daaga gave me a moment to say goodbye, then took the baby into the forest. She came back without him.”

Chitani fell silent. The birds chirped happily through the air, the forest as beautiful as ever, but mindless of her pain. I said nothing, letting her speak when she decided she must. She was crying again, but without sobbing. Even my twins were still, as if they knew what was happening outside my womb.
“Daaga...did me a great kindness that night,” she continued. “The child would not have survived and I would not be...strong enough to...” Chitani sighed. “She tried to keep it a secret for as long as possible, but word spread. Eventually, after a council with Daaga and some of the other shamans…it was decided that...that my gifts as a woman had been rejected by the Gods. That I was no longer allowed to have children. That is why I hunt with the men during the day, instead. So that I may still be of use to the tribe, even if I cannot bear young.”

Another pause.
“...I'm sorry, Chitani,” I said, unable to keep silent anymore, but not sure of what to say. “I...didn't know that...” I swallowed a lump, looking down at my fertile body with shame. “I didn't know that I brought so much pain to you.”
Chitani smiled, shaking her head and chuckling. She tugged on my tail with her own and turned to look at me, her eyes shining with tears.

“It's not your fault, Nina,” she said. “It's wonderful that you are so full with life. And this was many years ago. I have made peace with these memories, even if they may hurt me from time to time. I have lived through too many mating seasons, seeing my friends filled with their own children, to be wounded by the thought.” Her face fell again as her eyes drifted to my belly. She reached over and patted it, rubbing a small circle over my stretched skin. “Though...When you...when Daaga discovered your twins…” She sighed again, letting her arm fall to her side. She pulled her tail back into her lap and held it, just to have something to do with her hands.

“You are the first Two Soul the Naragaka has had in many, many seasons…The last one was my mother.”
I felt a renewed pang of sadness, but waited for Chitani to explain.
“...I was born a twin. I came out first, healthy and well. What would have been my sister came out...still and silent.” Chitani shook her head, running her fingers through her short hair and looking out at the forest. “Daaga was an apprentice at the time. Her mentor took the blame, declaring that he had been wrong about my mother being Two Soul, that I was the only child. The birth was private and in secret, so Daaga and myself are the only ones who know the truth.”
This time, I was the one crying, overcome by Chitani's hidden sadness. It seemed selfish, but I held my belly, making sure that I could feel both twins moving at the same time. I was quietly relieved at feeling two sets of kicks from inside.

“I don't know what I can say,” I whimpered.
“Our family has experienced much pain, Nina,” Chitani said. “It is a blessing you have come to us, to bring joy back to our bloodline.” She shifted closer and pulled me closer, stroking my hair as I leaned on her shoulder. “To help grow our family while I cannot.”
“…That...that doesn't have to be true, Chitani,” I said. I sat up and put my hand on her shoulder. “After the twins are born...I'm going back to London with Davi. He wanted to come with me. And I want you to come with us. We can get you treatment. Medicine outside is very good. Doctors these days can cure almost anything.”

Chitani blinked, surprised at my offer. But after a moment, she closed her eyes and sighed, shaking her head sadly.
“I already know what Davi told you,” she said. “He wanted me to come with him as well.”
“But will you do it?” I asked, eagerly taking her hand in mine. “I have a house and it's too big for one person anyway. We could all live together and we could make sure you get treatment to have children again if you wanted it!” I was getting excited just at the idea. “And-And you won't have to leave for long! If you decide you don't like it, we can- we can bring you back to the village! Please, Chitani, it would be wonderful to have you in London with us. I want the twins to know who their aunt is.”

Chitani stared at me, new pain crossing over her face. I thought for a moment she was about to cry again. She pulled her hands away and sat up straight to impose a sense of authority.
“Nina,” she said, sternly, “I will not leave this village with you. And neither will my brother.”
“...What?” I said, drawing a blank. The momentum of my enthusiasm ground to a halt.
“I won't let Davi leave the jungle,” she said. “He won't come with you.”
I felt a lurching, falling sensation in the pit of my stomach.
“...But...but he...why not?”

“Davi has only seen the good of the world outside,” Chitani said. “He is naive. He knows nothing of its pain, its sadness, its cruelty. The truth is that Davi is not the first Naragaka to leave the village. He is simply one of the few to have done so and returned alive.” She shook her head sadly and looked away. “Living in the jungle for so long has made our bodies weak to diseases your people simply ignore. Davi doesn't understand how fragile he is.”
“But...But Chitani...” I shook my head, pleading with her. “There is medicine now that can help him, that can keep him safe. He won't be-”
“You cannot tell me this for certain,” Chitani said, coldly. “And I will not risk the life of my own brother on what 'might' be.”

My words stuck in my throat, remembering the shades of memory of my own father, who died young of similar causes. I pulled my tail away from hers, letting it lay in the dirt beneath the tree. I felt one of the twins kick and held my hands around my belly. I swallowed, trying to prevent tears of my own from coming on.
“You would keep him from his own children, Chitani?” I countered. “Would you force them to grow up without their father?”

“No, I would not,” Chitani said. “And that is why they will not leave this village, either.”

I jerked my head around to stare at her, keeping my hands over my belly as if to protect the twins inside.
“What are you talking about?”
Chitani stood and looked down at me, a tenderness behind her unyielding strength.
“Nina, I love you. You are like a sister to me and a great gift to our family and our tribe. I beg of you to stay with us, but I cannot force you. Once your children are born, you are free to leave, if you so wish. But if you do, you will leave alone, never to return. And you will not leave as Naragaka.”

Chitani's hands shook at her sides, but her expression remained as still as rock. I barely even noticed I had started crying as well until the tears dropped down my face and stained my fur. My jaw quivering, I looked down at my belly, rubbing my hands over my fur. I watched a soft bump rise above the smooth surface as one of the twins pushed out a foot. I put a hand over the spot, feeling the baby push against my hand. I wished so badly I could reach inside my womb and hold them in my arms, right then. I hadn't even met them, didn't know what they looked like, but they were already my entire world.

“You can't do this,” I whimpered. “I have...I have a life, Chitani. I've lived my entire life in London, you can't make me give that up.” I hiccuped once as the tears began to flow in earnest. I rubbed my hands over my belly, the thought of leaving my babies behind physically sickening me. “You can't make me choose...”

“I won't make you do anything, Nina,” Chitani said, turning away to stride off into the tall grass. Before she went farther, she turned over her shoulder and added, “But the one thing you must do...is choose.”

With that, she wiped her eyes on the back of her arm and walked confidently and silently through the underbrush toward the village. Once she was out of earshot, and I found myself alone in the forest, I let myself cry with the full force I had been holding back in front of my sister-in-law. I pushed the sobbing out of me, my arms wrapped around my belly as if the twins would be stolen from me at any moment.

If the Naragaka are admired for their strength, then maybe I'm not one of them after all.