Hello everyone!

To make a long story short, I've moved to a different page. I'm here now >  IvaShelest
If you enjoyed watching my art before, then welcome!

Perhaps it would be better if I continued working here, but I feel constrained and limited. I haven't felt any connection to my former self for a long time. Black Mist will still exist as a character and remain with me, but she's not me, and I'm not her. Yes, I could simply change my nickname and do what I did before, but I still feel uneasy about that. I can't allow myself to do that, forgive me.
As for the reason I've been absent... There may even be several reasons. First of all, I've been living with a sense of self-disappointment for a long time. Things haven't always turned out the way I wanted, and now I accept that as normal. But back then, I was tormenting myself for not working hard enough on myself. Could you call that perfectionism? Most likely, yes.
Secondly, this is a very difficult time not only for me but for many people. It's hard for me to live with the thought that all this is happening. I'm even afraid to speak out. And for that, forgive me. All I can say is that I wish everyone a peaceful and happy life.
Thirdly, due to existing problems, I found a job a few years ago. And everything was fine until my hands started hurting. I was making food-shaped toys out of polymer clay; it wasn't freelancing. I was working for someone else. It was interesting work, but I didn't spare myself, which is why I'm now worried about how I'll live my life. I started treatment, and for a while, I felt better. Then everything was fine until I started straining my hands again. I don't have a diagnosis right now, but I plan to continue treatment soon. I can draw, but I need light stretches and breaks from time to time. The main thing is to remember to take care of yourself. I'm writing this for anyone who does something similar. Please take care of your health.
During my time away from Furrafinity, I never stopped drawing, but I did it rarely. I tried to distract myself with traditional art, and it helped. I went through various stages of self-acceptance and came to the conclusion that I miss the furry community, even though I'm not the most active member.
I hope that apathy and self-criticism will no longer plague me. I need to give myself the freedom of choice and the ability to forgive my mistakes. It’s also hard for me to imagine my life without drawing.

If you read this to the end, thank you and sorry for the inconvenience!!

(If anyone is interested, I am currently holding a Christmas raffle > https://www.furaffinity.net/view/63020957 )