BASICS

What day are you getting there?
Friday morning

How are you traveling?
Private jet

Where are you staying?
The con hotel

Who will you be rooming with?
Some dawgs

How long are you going?
Until I get banned


PERSONAL

What do you look like?
I have a smallish coconut shaped head with features of a Cabbage Patch Kid

What is your gender?
Priority Mail

How tall are you?
A good height for 69

Can I talk to you?
No

Can I touch you?
Have you ever heard of #huggate?

Can I hug or snuggle?
See previous response

Are you nice?
Im kinda an asshole


CONVENTION

Will you be mursuiting?
gross.


Where will you be most of the time during the day/s?
Throwing up in the lobby most of the time

What is the best way to find you?
Follow the scent of musk and champagne

If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Shoot me in the head

Are there any panels you might be attending?
How to quit the fandom

Will you be going to parties?
Ive never been to a party.

Will you be performing oral sex?
yep, behind the dumpster.

What/where will you be eating?
Ass.

Can I come with you for food/fun/etc?
only the etc part

Can I visit your room?
If you make it past the bouncer. Face control.

Can I buy you drinks?
Im rich, I dont need your charity

Can I give you stuff?
No.

Can I take your picture?
No, my grandmother, before joining Dykes on bikes, was Amish, and as I am 1/19 Amish, I believe photos steal my soul.

What are your goals for the con this year?
Get married in the lobby