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Alive
18 years ago
General
But alone. I don't think I've ever felt alone as I do right now. Everyone else is frolicking, having a good time. Getting boyfriends...but I'm stuck, doing projects that take forever even though everyone else seems to be able to get them done in four hours.
I worry that all my life is going to have to show is the product I can turn out. No one every calls me unless they need something to be done for them or they need a ride somewhere. Or they feel that our project is going to not get completed and then try to force me to be compatible with their schedule. Or attack the very principles of my character and then think I was the one in the wrong. Bitch, please. Get over your fucking self. Life isn't a damn part 24/7...there are those of us who have to produce a decent product that can't be bullshit. Get a real major.
I offend people left and right now. I have flaky friends who can hold off on their homework and projects until the last minute and the professors love them. Yet, I feel like I put in all the effort and get nowhere.
I guess it's too late too mention that I don't get much sleep anymore...but then again, what major does?
I don't feel okay anymore, I feel worn. I feel overloaded but not overwhelmed. People place all these expectations on me and situations, then they get pissy when they don't work out the right way. And you know what's really sad, I'd have been telling them that it's not going to work out all the time. I come up with simple, easy solutions, and they don't like them. I put out issues it might have and they don't want to listen...I'm sorry. It's the business major part of me coming out, the more pragmatic and logical side. I want it to work the first time through, I don't want to have go back and rework things so it does because of a conceptual idea.
And then there are people that are trying to cause shit and think I don't know it. Careful there, bitch. I don't think you want to do that.
People have run me ragged, and I'm getting tired of trying to hide it. I'm lonely, pissed off, and moody.
I worry that all my life is going to have to show is the product I can turn out. No one every calls me unless they need something to be done for them or they need a ride somewhere. Or they feel that our project is going to not get completed and then try to force me to be compatible with their schedule. Or attack the very principles of my character and then think I was the one in the wrong. Bitch, please. Get over your fucking self. Life isn't a damn part 24/7...there are those of us who have to produce a decent product that can't be bullshit. Get a real major.
I offend people left and right now. I have flaky friends who can hold off on their homework and projects until the last minute and the professors love them. Yet, I feel like I put in all the effort and get nowhere.
I guess it's too late too mention that I don't get much sleep anymore...but then again, what major does?
I don't feel okay anymore, I feel worn. I feel overloaded but not overwhelmed. People place all these expectations on me and situations, then they get pissy when they don't work out the right way. And you know what's really sad, I'd have been telling them that it's not going to work out all the time. I come up with simple, easy solutions, and they don't like them. I put out issues it might have and they don't want to listen...I'm sorry. It's the business major part of me coming out, the more pragmatic and logical side. I want it to work the first time through, I don't want to have go back and rework things so it does because of a conceptual idea.
And then there are people that are trying to cause shit and think I don't know it. Careful there, bitch. I don't think you want to do that.
People have run me ragged, and I'm getting tired of trying to hide it. I'm lonely, pissed off, and moody.
