The longest year (life update)
a month ago
General
It's been awhile since I gave a life update, and with how my art's been slow lately a lot of people have been asking for YCH updates and things like that. So I owe it to everyone to just lay everything out on the table:
2025 sucked, actually my entire life just kind of sucked last year and it's gonna stay that way for a bit longer. I got tons of burnout, spiraled into self hatred because nothing was getting done, and had some dark thoughts in there, all of it just feeding into itself and getting worse as time went on. And why is my queue so bad? Because for several years I was supporting some friends that were in bad shape. They're no one in this community, but they're friends in Burma/Myanmar who've been struggling on account of the war and then the Earthquake there. I took on more work than I realistically could because they needed it, and even when I was behind I took more because if I didn't they'd loose everything from their food to the roof over their heads. And tbh I probably would've kept going if the earthquake last year hadn't taken those things from them anyway. But basically I was a parent taking care of them, and I ruined myself to do it, and I'm still ruined because I now have 2 years worth of art to get through.
But this isn't about me feeling sorry for myself, this is a journal about real steps I'm taking to get back on my feet. First thing's first, I'm going back to Kentucky. Over Christmas I talked to my family, and when the lease renews in June for us, Ren and Dandy will sign their names but I won't. It's going to be hard leaving some of my best friends in Florida, but the fact is paying my part of rent and groceries and bills is bleeding me every month. So I'm gonna live with my parents, save my money, and without a need to take comms for all that stuff I'm gonna hopefully be able to really clear the queue. Big Stories will be unaffected, but don't be surprised if stuff is slow or interrupted in June, since I'm gonna be pretty fucking sad about this.
In the meantime I'm still working on YCH's. No one's been forgotten, I'm just juggling Patreon, comms, and ych's and progress is being divided among all three. The big hurdle right now is the comic ych's, which I've sent lines to most of the folks waiting on those and even gotten flats on about 1/4 of them, but I'm chipping at the bases to just stick y'all in. I got the C, but not the H in the YCH as it were. But the comics were really big, involved, and I bit off too much on them and I will NEVER offer anything like them again. Once they're through, the others are fairly simple and in fact I've already got base lines for a few of the ones after the comics started, for folks who wanted an update.
So really it's just me chugging along until June, not much else to it. The other thing I'd like to change soon is my commissions; I don't want to do illustrations anymore. I like fashion, I like design, I like styling, and I'd like to have it in the future that instead of doing scenes and such, I design wardrobes for people's characters, croquis and paper dolls. No crazy poses, no insane sizes, no effects, no backgrounds, just a simple image of the character in a new outfit. And when I get there I'd like to take less and less comms until I can work on a portfolio and stop doing freelance.
Yeah we can all see I suck at freelancing, not as in my art is bad, but I just don't have the speed or discipline to do it forever. So someday there might be a day when my accounts just go silent. 'Ugh I can't believe it, another furry ditching the fandom' No that's not what's happening. I'm not gonna delete all my shit or denounce this part of myself, I've made too many friends and I appreciate the support I've gotten too much to do that. But someday I want to have a career designing clothes, doing what I went to school for, and furry art will become the hobby again. It's a long way away, and I'll have to work hard to make up for lost time, but it's what I truly want and I know it's my real calling.
So yeah, not a very precise update, but that's what my 2026 is looking like; 6 months of wistful routine with my best friends knowing everything is gonna end soon, followed my six months of grinding on this backlog. It's gonna be a pretty terrible year, but I'm going to do my best, because I don't wanna betray the trust and patience everyone has already shown me. I've got a couple comms I haven't posted because the holidays just had me forget, and I jumped right back into work after it all wrapped up, but I'll try to keep everyone posted. Sorry for any typos or run-ons in here, I typed it all in one big burst really, but I wanna just finish with a 'Thank you' to everyone for everything so far.
2025 sucked, actually my entire life just kind of sucked last year and it's gonna stay that way for a bit longer. I got tons of burnout, spiraled into self hatred because nothing was getting done, and had some dark thoughts in there, all of it just feeding into itself and getting worse as time went on. And why is my queue so bad? Because for several years I was supporting some friends that were in bad shape. They're no one in this community, but they're friends in Burma/Myanmar who've been struggling on account of the war and then the Earthquake there. I took on more work than I realistically could because they needed it, and even when I was behind I took more because if I didn't they'd loose everything from their food to the roof over their heads. And tbh I probably would've kept going if the earthquake last year hadn't taken those things from them anyway. But basically I was a parent taking care of them, and I ruined myself to do it, and I'm still ruined because I now have 2 years worth of art to get through.
But this isn't about me feeling sorry for myself, this is a journal about real steps I'm taking to get back on my feet. First thing's first, I'm going back to Kentucky. Over Christmas I talked to my family, and when the lease renews in June for us, Ren and Dandy will sign their names but I won't. It's going to be hard leaving some of my best friends in Florida, but the fact is paying my part of rent and groceries and bills is bleeding me every month. So I'm gonna live with my parents, save my money, and without a need to take comms for all that stuff I'm gonna hopefully be able to really clear the queue. Big Stories will be unaffected, but don't be surprised if stuff is slow or interrupted in June, since I'm gonna be pretty fucking sad about this.
In the meantime I'm still working on YCH's. No one's been forgotten, I'm just juggling Patreon, comms, and ych's and progress is being divided among all three. The big hurdle right now is the comic ych's, which I've sent lines to most of the folks waiting on those and even gotten flats on about 1/4 of them, but I'm chipping at the bases to just stick y'all in. I got the C, but not the H in the YCH as it were. But the comics were really big, involved, and I bit off too much on them and I will NEVER offer anything like them again. Once they're through, the others are fairly simple and in fact I've already got base lines for a few of the ones after the comics started, for folks who wanted an update.
So really it's just me chugging along until June, not much else to it. The other thing I'd like to change soon is my commissions; I don't want to do illustrations anymore. I like fashion, I like design, I like styling, and I'd like to have it in the future that instead of doing scenes and such, I design wardrobes for people's characters, croquis and paper dolls. No crazy poses, no insane sizes, no effects, no backgrounds, just a simple image of the character in a new outfit. And when I get there I'd like to take less and less comms until I can work on a portfolio and stop doing freelance.
Yeah we can all see I suck at freelancing, not as in my art is bad, but I just don't have the speed or discipline to do it forever. So someday there might be a day when my accounts just go silent. 'Ugh I can't believe it, another furry ditching the fandom' No that's not what's happening. I'm not gonna delete all my shit or denounce this part of myself, I've made too many friends and I appreciate the support I've gotten too much to do that. But someday I want to have a career designing clothes, doing what I went to school for, and furry art will become the hobby again. It's a long way away, and I'll have to work hard to make up for lost time, but it's what I truly want and I know it's my real calling.
So yeah, not a very precise update, but that's what my 2026 is looking like; 6 months of wistful routine with my best friends knowing everything is gonna end soon, followed my six months of grinding on this backlog. It's gonna be a pretty terrible year, but I'm going to do my best, because I don't wanna betray the trust and patience everyone has already shown me. I've got a couple comms I haven't posted because the holidays just had me forget, and I jumped right back into work after it all wrapped up, but I'll try to keep everyone posted. Sorry for any typos or run-ons in here, I typed it all in one big burst really, but I wanna just finish with a 'Thank you' to everyone for everything so far.
FA+

And thank you for sticking around even if it’s not your focus anymore, I think this community we have is something that never leaves you and you should be proud of what you have draw and art you have created, and being a furry fashion designer sounds super fun and while there’s no huge sizes now I’m sure a few outfits can be sized for the more “filled out” fur cus even real life no one has that perfect bod, I for one would love to see what you could end up doing for my oc’s!
I’m super excited for you!
I'm sorry you've been dealing with all this in the background and I'm sorry things aren't going to get better for you for at least the next while.
I hope sharing this helps at least a little and I hope you know we're all here for you.
I'm glad you're in a path to pursuing what you want to do.
Good luck with 2026, hopefully things will be better on the other side.
I’m happy to got two of your OCs and I’ll guarantee that they’ll be in good hands when you’ll be on here less and less. I do enjoy the idea of new outfits that you want to put guys in and if anything I might commission something like that in the future