Chaos gave a groan, rubbing a paw over his head as he pulled out of his unconscious state.

"Ugh...Wh, what hit me...?" The boy whimpered quietly, and narrowed his eyes, trying to focus on the words that suddenly appeared in front of him. He was in the laboratory- the basement of his home, and in front of him was his nefarious scientific rival- Calamity. His brother grinned wickedly at his captive and jostled the picket sign he held in front of Chaos, eager for the boy to read his fate.

[Enjoy your nap, little brother? THIS is for turning my robot at the science fair into a joke! I don't know how you programed it to say those things but those were NOT mathematical equations! That was...t, that was...] The sign read. Chaos grinned.

"Genius. Pure genius. The look on your face when it started reading those logs from 1-800-portable-holes." Chaos grinned wickedly. Calamity only smiled and tapped a fingertip against his brother's nose.

[Well. Now we're even. ] The sign post read, and Calamity held up a mirror. Instead of shaggy gray fur (Or pink skin, Chaos was never really sure which one he'd wake up with, now that he was dating Claire) He had soft, pale blue fuzz covering him. Instead of a soft gray underbelly, it was a creamy white. His nose was pink, his ears were round and cute, and his tail was a large bushy S shape. He stared, and Calamity grinned wildly.

[Welcome to your new form. I took the liberty of dosing you with a sleeping dart and did some experiments. We're square little brother. We're square. ] Calamity chuckled coldly, folded his paws behind his back, and turned sharply on his heels to meander back up the stairs.

"I...I'm a skunk...you turned me into a SKUNK! I'M. A. SKUNK! DUDE! Claire is gonna FLIP!" Chaos squealed- gleefully. Calamity froze- ears pointed up like exclamation points, and he turned with a snarl across his face.

[NO! NO, you stop enjoying this RIGHT, NOW!] His sign board read. Chaos ignored it, and sprang up from his seat beaming brightly while glancing himself over.

"Ooooo maybe she'll give me EXTRA kisses, now that I look like this! EEeee, I bet she will! I bet she'll love it! I'm gonna go comb my hair! I bet she'll wanna go out tonight!" Chaos squealed.

[No! Stop it! Stop enjoying this!] Calamity's picket read.

"I'm gonna!" Chaos snapped.

[Don't do it!] Calamity growled.

"I'm doin' it! I'm loving this! Puis-je parler le français ? Je peux! Je Peux! Je veux beurrer vos petits pains, ma petite pâtisserie crémeuse! "Chaos giggled. Calamity stared.

"...And wine! I need wine. I bet she'll love some french wine! OH! I'll need a beret and a striped shirt!! I'm gonna take her out tonight! Dude, I'm totally gettin' some tonight! I don't even know what SOME is, but as a skunk, I'm sure I'll get like, two or three bowls full! Thanks Calamity!!" Chaos squealed and dashed past him up stairs to his room.

"CALAMITY!" Shrieked a voice from the kitchen, and Calamity's ears folded nervously around his skull. Joy was calling him. He winced and quickly trotted up the stairs, poking his head into the kitchen, where his mother stood with her arms crossed, and a glare across her muzzle. The boy gulped.

"Did you turn your brother into a skunk, Calamity? Cause now he won't stop doing this. " She snapped, pointing towards Chaos, who was furiously humping the air, saying "Oh- La-la!" over and over again.

[I didn't do THAT to him. ] Calamity's sign post read.

"Grounded. We talked about this. What did I say about using science to rewrite genetic code?" Joy frowned.

[No tampering with genetic and DNA sequencing unless I have you or dad's permission.] Calamity sighed. Joy nodded her head and glanced at her vigorously humping son.

"I want grand children, not mutant skunk spawn from Chaos' loins. Ugh, those things would be like out of that one movie. Aliens. Don't even wanna think about that. " She frowned.

[Aww, mom, I don't think it'll be that bad. Sigorny Weaver isn't THAT ugly.] Calamity replied.

"Just. Fix him. Do it now before he gets away." Joy growled. Calamity sighed and turned towards his brother, who grinned at him.

"We shall go to zee Casbah, no? We will make zee beautiful music, oui?" The skunk boy asked. Calamity balked.

[Mom! Chaos this threatening me!] Read the signpost.

"You've got no one to blame but yourself on this one, Calamity. What happens in the Casbah, stays in the Casbah. " Said Joy.

[But I don't WANT to be sodomized by my brother!] Calamity whined. His mother didn't give an inch though, picking both of them up by the scruffs of their necks and tossing them down the stairs into the basement.

"Well you SHOULD have thought about that BEFORE you pulled this little stunt! "Joy snapped. Calamity stared.

[What? You want me to imagine my little brother sodomizing me? Why would I EVER do that?"] Calamity's signpost read.

"What's going on?" A new voice sprinkled the air- Pandora, who poked her head around the curvature of the stairs, looking down towards Chaos and Calamity.

"Calamity is thinking about being sodomized by Chaos." Joy explained.

"It's always the quiet ones. " Pandora sighed.


[Alright stupid. Mom said I have to change you back, so sit still, don't move, and let me go fiddle with my machine.] Calamity snorted viciously. The skunk smiled.

"Is that what you call it these days? I figured you'd get a girlfriend by NOW Cal. But, doesn't matter. You go 'fiddle' with your 'machine' and I am going to score tonight. I'll probably get two touchdowns and a field goal. And if I'm lucky, I'll even get a penalty shot!" Chaos beamed. Calamity stared.

[You've got no idea what your talking about, do you?] The coyote's sign post read. Chaos stuck his tongue out.

"I'll know before YOU do. I'm gonna ask Claire! I bet she'll let me score eighty three points!! I don't even know what sports she's into. Probably whatever team has Charles Barkley. That's football, right? With the sticks?" Chaos asked. Calamity sighed.

[You're thinking of Lacrosse, Chaos, you dweeb. Charles Barkley plays hockey. ]
Calamity corrected. Chaos rolled his eyes.

"Wrong. Wait, do you score in hockey?" The boy whimpered. Calamity sighed and shrugged his shoulders. Chaos huffed.

"Doesn't matter. I'm gonna score, like, forty seven points tonight. How do you get a three point shot with a girl? Is there...do girls have goal posts? " Chaos grinned, thrusting his hips into the air. Calamity gave a snort.

[The problem with that, is your stupid, Chaos. Now hold still, and PLEASE stop talking.] Calamity's sign read. Chaos stuck his tongue out. He wasn't going to let his chance slip away! Claire would squeal if she saw him right now. It was time to invoke a strategy of cunning and guile to slip past his brother.

"LOOK OVER THERE! A DISTRACTION!" Chaos shrieked, and pointed to the wall. Calamity sighed.

[Chaos I'm not going to-] Calamity explained.

"WRENCH TO THE FACE!" Chaos squealed, and grabbed a wrench from the nearest table and cracked it across Calamity's noggin, dropping the coyote like a ton of bricks.

"Annnnnd off we go." Chaos giggled, and skipped merrily off to find Claire for the evening.

---

Sorry, I ran of of material there. I'm back from a very...impromptu vacation. Not super great. But I've been wanting to post this for a few days and just started writing what was coming to me. A few jokes, no plot, pretty picture, though. Drawn, of course, by  Clairelamouf Cause I wanted to know what Chaos would look like as a skunk. ;)