On a hill in brightest days does stand,
A Manor, a House, a Home,
With its richness and glory a testament to success,
Of colors most inviting, finest marble, smoothest oak,
All passerby do gawk at the luck owner
With the richest hearth, boldest paint, cleanest windows
And of course its air of perfume,
And they smiled,
But in the darkness when all eyes are closed,
A thousand thoughts are left to wander,
To wonder, to search, to seek,
And bumble through the twisting,
The climbing, the ruined, the crumbling,
Passages of that mansion,
And there in the pure and utter void,
The real solitude of self-discovery does,
A door pop to show, to unfurl, to unmask,
And allow us to brush by that which we,
Cannot hope, dare not decipher, fear to find,
When realization reveals the hollowness,
The emptiness within the confines,
Of the depths of the castle, they wince,
They pain, they bruise, they bleed at knowing,
It is empty, lacking, worthless,
But sunup, sundown they trudge,
Displaying a burnished and gleaming treasure,
Without substance, without value, without reason,
Each day is a struggle to rise and continue,
To persist, to maintain, to survive,
And in the course of every life does temptation rise,
To call, to beckon, to bargain,
For that which only the most philosophic,
The most reverent, the most literature, the most desperate
Can dare to even consider,
To dash down that which already is empty, inside,
With hacking saws, smashing hammer, burning oil,
And make a choice once it is gone to build anew,
To rise and flourish, not merely survive,
Or sink down deep where the neighborhood has discarded them,
They now naked and bare to the eyes of the world,
To depravity, to depression, to darkness,
And there rip up the foundations
A Manor, a House, a Home,
With its richness and glory a testament to success,
Of colors most inviting, finest marble, smoothest oak,
All passerby do gawk at the luck owner
With the richest hearth, boldest paint, cleanest windows
And of course its air of perfume,
And they smiled,
But in the darkness when all eyes are closed,
A thousand thoughts are left to wander,
To wonder, to search, to seek,
And bumble through the twisting,
The climbing, the ruined, the crumbling,
Passages of that mansion,
And there in the pure and utter void,
The real solitude of self-discovery does,
A door pop to show, to unfurl, to unmask,
And allow us to brush by that which we,
Cannot hope, dare not decipher, fear to find,
When realization reveals the hollowness,
The emptiness within the confines,
Of the depths of the castle, they wince,
They pain, they bruise, they bleed at knowing,
It is empty, lacking, worthless,
But sunup, sundown they trudge,
Displaying a burnished and gleaming treasure,
Without substance, without value, without reason,
Each day is a struggle to rise and continue,
To persist, to maintain, to survive,
And in the course of every life does temptation rise,
To call, to beckon, to bargain,
For that which only the most philosophic,
The most reverent, the most literature, the most desperate
Can dare to even consider,
To dash down that which already is empty, inside,
With hacking saws, smashing hammer, burning oil,
And make a choice once it is gone to build anew,
To rise and flourish, not merely survive,
Or sink down deep where the neighborhood has discarded them,
They now naked and bare to the eyes of the world,
To depravity, to depression, to darkness,
And there rip up the foundations
Category Poetry / Abstract
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 21.5 kB
Looks good.
By the way, Dragon TF has got a critique now, though I did criticized the writer of it for leaving you out. You can see it here. http://rapiermedia.deviantart.com/c.....que/517518199/
By the way, Dragon TF has got a critique now, though I did criticized the writer of it for leaving you out. You can see it here. http://rapiermedia.deviantart.com/c.....que/517518199/
I did something similar one time. I had some ideas floating around but I wasn't sure how to frame them out. I was talking to a friend about it in a chat and just did a blind telling. They start semi-stream of consciousness, but they weren't half-bad so I just left them in my notes. *smirks* Actually quite proud of those rough ones.
Yeah, I feel the same with my earlier writings. Although I don't have most, if any, of them up on here anymore, I still look back to my first pieces and smile, no matter how terrible they are compared to my current stuff. And they seem to get more happy and wonderful with time.
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