She shook her head as the connemara mare approached to her, the little mare had the beautiful colors of a palomino and her mood and temper matched just perfectly to the delightful colors. The grey mixbreed mare looked down on her, wiht wide opened blue eyes, as if something had frightened her. "What.. What do you want?" She whispered, as calmly as she could, with just a snitch of unhappiness in her voice. The connemara mare shook her head as she stopped, a meter from the mixbreed. "I just came to check if you were fine.." She said, and smiled at her. The mixbreed shook her head and laid her ears. "I'm.. I'm completely fine" She answered, though she felt sick, and like she just wanted to give up upon everything. Before the connemara could reach to answer, the mixbreed ran off, out of sight, and stopped when she had laid enough distance between herself and the herd. She looked over her shoulder, at her friends, she listened carefully as they goofed around, unknowing of the mare's plans for her future life. She sighed and looked forward once again, she was standing completely still for a while. Before she reared and then jumped forward in galop. She ran as fast as she could, and didn't care if she would run into stallions, predators or anything. Her only thoughts were to get away, away from everything.. Away from those who'd been tearing her apart, mentally, leaving a deep mark of arrogance and unuseful coolness over the mare, while dragging her to the stupid point of taking favors, but being unable to repay them. The felt the cold feeling creeping upon her back as she reached the forest, but that didn't stop her, nor did it make her turn around to run back to safety. She stopped as she reached a lake in the other side of the forest. She looked back over her shoulder again, she knew she suffered from paranoia, but this time, that scary and unpleasent feeling were even stronger. She looked forward with her blue/grey eyes as she took another step forward. Then she stopped and took a few steps back again, shaking her head like crazy, before she started running along the lake, untill she reached the other side and then continued to run through the forest. She ignored the branches that scratched her and sometimes even hit her, due to the speed she'd gained already. As she reached the meadow, she stopped, and looked suspisciosly around, then she hurt something, and she jumped forward and started running again, with her eyes wide open and ears laid completely down along the neck. She kept running, as if she was running for her life. But stopped as a fence got in the way. She weren't much of a jumper, and would most likely start to look for another way around, and so she did. The place appeared to be an abandoned ranch. The mare used a lot of time smelling things, catching up the really old scent of humans who had once been living there. The mare wasn't dumb, but she had given up already, she walked over and kicked in the door to the barn, and laid down in the hay. Listening as the rain started to pound down on the roof of the barn. She felt the heat, from her warm muzzles after all of the running. "This is it.." She said to herself. "I've put an end to it all" She slowly closed her eyes, as she fell asleep. While hoping, never to wake up.

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Any of you ever felt that.. You just wanted to leave everything behind, no matter how great it was/is? and just wanna stay in your own little messed up world to try and find happiness there, or just rapidly going to sleep, hoping to never wake up again, although you do it anyway, just to feel depressed, lonely and worthless again?

The little short story describes pretty much how I feel, and explains how I want to run away. I've had dreams where I've been leaving and giving up on everything I had, and for the time being, I start crying randomly, and when people ask, I refuse and say I'm fine.

The particular reason for this, isn't something I'd like to talk about, cause in my opinion, there's noone that really understands me, and then, I see no use in letting strangers nor friends nor family in on my problems, no matter how bad and worthless I feel and think myself to be.

Well, enjoy this artwork and do not use it as anything, at least not without my permission.

The picture is drawn with the 'waterpencil' in Easy Paint Tool SAI