Wonderful.
The meter is terrible in places, and you used approximate rhyme far to frequently, but the message rang crystal clear throughout, and that is the important thing. As is the message itself, which is not lost on me. You and your friend would enjoy the band DragonForce, I think, because almost all their songs share a spirit with this rather lengthy ode to battle.
I commend the both of you on unmasking the spirit of a true warrior.

*whistles* That's a long poem! Since I don't write poetry much (and when I do it's rather short) I can't say much more than that!

~GR