I never got a chance to post this, as I have been trying to recollect my life back together.
In 2009, I lost nearly everything I had. I had just found out that my mother had Leukemia, I was labeled as a horrible Guest of Honor for MFM 2009, and I lost my boyfriend because I couldn't give up my morals of monogamy.
The one thing that I love, more than anything in the world, is snow. It's addictive, it's fun, it's awe-inspiring.
And yet, between everything that happened that year, I didn't want to live. I wanted to just give up. My heart had been broken, torn to pieces, and the so-called friends that I had come to know over the past 8 years suddenly disappeared. They, who had supported me through my works in comedy, who offered to help when I needed it, were the same people who called me worthless, dried-up, used.
This piece here represents every single feeling that I have felt since 2009: sorrow. I had taken a walk into a snowy wonderland, away from the people, away from the civilization, away from the noise, and just sat there and began to cry. I took off the hat to show that I was completely serious of my situation, and for the people who know me, I don't take off my hat at all. Hell, I've been accused of even sleeping with it on.
Another use of this piece is a good representation of the many lives that I have lost along the way, whether it be the One Person I loved the most in my life (I was engaged before She died to a horrible car crash), or the horrible crash that took away most of my memory and provided me with seizures. Though my 28 years here on earth, I have lost more people that I have loved over the years, making me afraid to even love again.
There are no other words to describe this picture.
Character:
isfacat
Art by:
animecat
Copyright 2009.
DO NOT RESIDTRIBUTE OR ALTER. DIGITAL WATERMARK SECURED BY DIGIMARC.
In 2009, I lost nearly everything I had. I had just found out that my mother had Leukemia, I was labeled as a horrible Guest of Honor for MFM 2009, and I lost my boyfriend because I couldn't give up my morals of monogamy.
The one thing that I love, more than anything in the world, is snow. It's addictive, it's fun, it's awe-inspiring.
And yet, between everything that happened that year, I didn't want to live. I wanted to just give up. My heart had been broken, torn to pieces, and the so-called friends that I had come to know over the past 8 years suddenly disappeared. They, who had supported me through my works in comedy, who offered to help when I needed it, were the same people who called me worthless, dried-up, used.
This piece here represents every single feeling that I have felt since 2009: sorrow. I had taken a walk into a snowy wonderland, away from the people, away from the civilization, away from the noise, and just sat there and began to cry. I took off the hat to show that I was completely serious of my situation, and for the people who know me, I don't take off my hat at all. Hell, I've been accused of even sleeping with it on.
Another use of this piece is a good representation of the many lives that I have lost along the way, whether it be the One Person I loved the most in my life (I was engaged before She died to a horrible car crash), or the horrible crash that took away most of my memory and provided me with seizures. Though my 28 years here on earth, I have lost more people that I have loved over the years, making me afraid to even love again.
There are no other words to describe this picture.
Character:
isfacatArt by:
animecatCopyright 2009.
DO NOT RESIDTRIBUTE OR ALTER. DIGITAL WATERMARK SECURED BY DIGIMARC.
Category Artwork (Digital) / All
Species Housecat
Size 618 x 800px
File Size 659.3 kB
Jesus, Isfa... I didn't know about some of those things.. God, I'm so sorry for coming off probably as a simple-minded fool whenever I prod you. I -am- here to talk, and I -do- care about you as a friend, far more than just some other furry to RP or whatever with. I guess I find it a way to express warmth and concern toward others when I feel I've no other way to. But I am here, and I do miss chatting and whatnot. Hell, call me if you want, I can PM you my number.
Here's hoping to see you sooner than FWA 2012.
Here's hoping to see you sooner than FWA 2012.
Isfa. I knew only a small part of your troubles that you've talked about with me over the last couple times at MFM. MFM 2009 was my first con, and despite all that, I thought you were a very kind person. I'm sorry for your loss and that you've suffered so much because the world needs people like you who can go through all that and still want to hug people. I hope your life will get better and better. You deserve it sweety.
Isfa, dude.. I didn't know it was that bad. Some of the stuff I knew from your LJ posts and such. But I can honestly say I never once thought you were worthless. Love ya, man! *HUGS* Same sentiments from Beka also. Don't forget we're only a call or a text away should you need to talk/vent/rant; etc.
FA+

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