i can share that sentiment i asked for a bunch of foil balloons for my high school graduation or i think you guys in england would call it upper school correct me if i am wrong , my dad laughed at me and said thats childish your a man now, now that im an adult i just get the disposable helium tanks and fill my own balloons up at home and my partner has expressed that now he loves them because of me , however if im at a store and i see balloons i might want at the check out i always make myself pass by them thinking "what if someone saw me buying them and putting them in the trunk of my car?" and "would they say something?" thats probably just me being parinoid given the past thinking im a grown man now i dont want to be embarresed like that but i guess at least i was able to find someway to have them around as i kinda need them some strange sensory thing with my autism but they make me feel calm happy and secure and since getting my own place a couple years ago ive had them around everyday now when i am away from home i cant sleep since i dont have them is that ridiculous? I just love them so much to the point of relying on them anyways i always love seeing your posts in my feed this essay was great