I used to be in the same camp as you until sometime in 2009. Had dial-up internet when most everyone else already had broadband cable. Had a wireless broadband ISP who was a total jerkface who canceled our subscription for simply just using the internet he gave us to the best of its abilities. Knocked us back to dial-up, and after my brother blew the whistle, he was forced to give us free internet for a year. We upgraded to Starlink for a little while around 2021 or so. And now finally, we have fiber-optic internet where I live. Though that really sucks you still have terrible internet.

Starlink is about the only option for truely fast internet out here but it's just so. dang. expensive!

Hopefully one of these days it gets cheaper. Because it was excellent for the amount of time I had it.

Just checked, it looks like they have come out with a "Residential Lite" plan for $80 month where your traffic is "de-prioritized" otherwise the full service is still a rather lofty $120 a month... However it looks like according to their coverage maps that Residential and Residential Lite are NOT available in my area STILL.
I think I'm stuck with their $165 month "Roam" plan...
So not even F*CKING STARLINK is properly avaliable in my area!?!?! WTF

1986: 300 Baud dial-up connection, FidoNet BBS. My cellphone did voice only, weighed almost 30 pounds and was bolted into my car.
2025: Fiber directly to the modem in my basement. Most of the sites I connect to can't keep up. My cell phone is in my T-shirt pocket.

2025 Rural America: Telephone line DSL (if the wires are still in use) or Cellular Internet with speeds that make websites Time-Out

So, your phone is made of wood and has a crank on the side...

Nah nah we're slightly more advanced. It's bakelite with a rotary dial on the front.