Two ways to rid yourself of caffeine addiction. One, gradual downgrade. In other words, use less and less until you no longer need it. Of course, you really can't get away from caffeine, it's in almost everything you eat or drink. It's just how much is in what you consume. Second, the old cold-turkey method. This can cause you to go through withdrawal shakes but you'll get over it a lot faster. I'm lucky, I can't drink coffee (I get migraine headaches whenever I so much as smell coffee), and I never could stand energy drinks. They made me too hyper and nervous. So, I drink sodas and tea. Both have caffeine but not in the concentrations of coffee and energy drinks. Anyway, those are my suggestions for your caffeine problem.

I've kinda tried both to some success. Trouble is after I manage to get off caffeine (or at least significant sources of it) someday eventually I'll go "oh one wont hurt" and then fall back into the trap again and get screwed up for months on end all over again

Uh-oh. Looks like we need a Caffeine Anonymous group for people who can't get over their caffeine habit. LOL (Now watch. Someone will say there is a group like that.)

Honestly sometimes I kinda wish there was.

At least you don't have to have caffeine. I drink some coffee every day. If I don't, I get migraines and other headaches. If I can keep it up for two days, I usually have an asthma attack which triggers a full-blown bronchitis event. Not fun. Yes, I can use my inhaler, but the effect is like trying to swallow a porcupine, giving it up for a bad job and pulling the creature back up my throat tail first.

Eeeesh.
If i try 'cold turkey' I get headaches but if I taper down it doesn't cause me any problems other than I just feel more tired.

Of course, the good thing is that eventually, you get over the tiredness. You may not be as bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as you would be with the caffeine, but you'd be able to sleep more easily. (At least, that's what happened to me when I stopped huge amounts of caffeine.)