Abby Clapton never got to say goodbye to her father Tarquin before his death - it happened that suddenly. She didn't even get the closure of knowing exactly how he met his maker - all she knows is that he headed out on some urgent business, and ended up never coming home. The most she's ever found out is simply that 'he had an accident'.
Exactly five years ago today, I had the exact same thing happen to me. On this day in March 2020, my dad Richard popped out for a spot of caving with one of his friends...and never came back again. To this day, none of us know exactly what happened in that cave - only that he he too somehow 'had an accident'. We never got to say goodbye either, although we can take solace in the fact that his final conversations with us were very low-key and casual - he never was one for extravagant farewells.
It recently struck me that in some strange way, making notes about the Claptons' bereavement may have played some part in helping me cope with my own loss - if nothing else, it was comforting to realise I wasn't alone in my grief. It also occurred to me that Abby's reactions in particular perfectly mirrored my own. Like me, she'd experienced that overwhelming sadness at losing someone she loved. Those angry demands as to why it had to happen. That desperate hope that maybe it hadn't; that it had all been a massive cock-up; that one day, he'd suddenly walk back through the door just as casually as he'd walked out.
I'm not really sure how to round this off, so Dad, if you somehow see this, I just want you to know that I've always loved you - even if I always had a hard time showing it - and I still miss you terribly.
And don't worry about the Volvo - it's in good paws.
***
Space Pirate Captain MacTaggart (C) Me 2015-2025
Artwork (C) Me 2025
Exactly five years ago today, I had the exact same thing happen to me. On this day in March 2020, my dad Richard popped out for a spot of caving with one of his friends...and never came back again. To this day, none of us know exactly what happened in that cave - only that he he too somehow 'had an accident'. We never got to say goodbye either, although we can take solace in the fact that his final conversations with us were very low-key and casual - he never was one for extravagant farewells.
It recently struck me that in some strange way, making notes about the Claptons' bereavement may have played some part in helping me cope with my own loss - if nothing else, it was comforting to realise I wasn't alone in my grief. It also occurred to me that Abby's reactions in particular perfectly mirrored my own. Like me, she'd experienced that overwhelming sadness at losing someone she loved. Those angry demands as to why it had to happen. That desperate hope that maybe it hadn't; that it had all been a massive cock-up; that one day, he'd suddenly walk back through the door just as casually as he'd walked out.
I'm not really sure how to round this off, so Dad, if you somehow see this, I just want you to know that I've always loved you - even if I always had a hard time showing it - and I still miss you terribly.
And don't worry about the Volvo - it's in good paws.
***
Space Pirate Captain MacTaggart (C) Me 2015-2025
Artwork (C) Me 2025
Category Artwork (Digital) / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 1981 x 1860px
File Size 2.74 MB
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