hi. this is from 2 months ago
sorry. consider me on a big hiatus. just dropping in to very occasionally post art (which i'm barely drawing. anyway)
realising very slowly i'm still grief stricken (and have been for a year and a half?) and it's effecting me in ways i didn't expect. i'm incredibly lazy now and can't make myself do literally anything. so

i had a really good weekend at the end of july where i went to a festival with a friend and got very drunk and very silly and basically realised if it weren't for my friends i wouldn't be here by now. cos of this grief. and i'm just a very fragile broken person kinda putting on this facade of being very tough and unshakeable and it's very weird i've been manic for just over a month but i'm also completely miserable. it's a great place to be in kinda. so yeah i can't do anything but i'm alive so that's good. lol