I dunno if the language insinuates that we ever were in a ldr, but no, we weren't. My point was I always thought I'd be fine about seeing him less often- -like if one of us went out of state to go to college and the other couldn't come or something. I always thought I'd be fine, because intellectually we'd still be close; like I am with my internet friends.

But now that he's gone, I even miss the things I thought I didn't care much for, like hand-holding and physical interactions as a whole. I'm touch-repulsed but I always made an exception for him because I love him and it didn't bother me at all when he did it.