I know that feeling, it's never easy when there's a ton of people

Yah its so scary.

Hopefully you can find a quiet one and meet some cool people

=(

I do the same thing (except writing instead of art). And then I worry that everyone hates me and secretly wants me to leave, and so I spiral into negative self-talk, and end up leaving all the servers I'm in and hiding and telling myself I should just never go on the internet again.

It's not fun.

But hey, now I have a therapist specifically for this issue, so, yay? I haven't bailed on all my servers in a while, and only rarely bailed on single servers. So, progress!

Same i feel like if i text anything and i mean anything i always go, "oh god, did i broke the rules?, did i offend someone?, will i get banned?"

With me, it's a sequence that goes like:

"Oh, nobody responded to that. That's okay, they're probably just busy with other stuff. It happens."
"Okay, now people are talking, I'll try speaking up now. ...and they just happened to all stop as soon as I said something. Oh. Well, maybe they just... didn't have anything to say about it?"
"Hm, nobody responded to that, but they're still talking. As if I didn't say anything. I guess... they're distracted with what they were already saying. Yeah. Probably just that... Right?"
"Okay, this is my third time this conversation trying to join in and talk about stuff related to what they're talking about. And still no acknowledgement I exist. ...yeah."

And after enough time, as my ability to tell myself it's just coincidence wears out. I start telling myself, "They all hate me. They're all thinking, 'God, I wish this stupid idiot would take the hint already. Shut up and go away!' It'd be best for everyone if I stop bothering them." So I stop talking, but then every time I look at the server, all I can think of is how much everyone hates me, and it just hurts more. So after a few more days, I end up just leaving the server.

I'm trying to get better about this, but it's pretty difficult. I really only have a small handful of servers where I bother being active. Isolating myself only ever makes things worse, but it's so hard to pull myself out of these spirals. But I'll keep working on it, and try to keep getting better. ^_^;;

Hopefully we both get better at it eventually ^^. We can do it!
I been doing little baby steps after posting the art .

I still post links to each new chapter in 5-6 servers and two Telegram chats, but only one server (the yinglet discord, though they react to all three series and not just the yinglet one) has people who actually react, and one person in one Telegram chat. It can be a bit disheartening, but I remind myself that I'm writing for me, having anyone else enjoy it is just a bonus. ^_^;;

Good for you :D

And that is the reason why I prefer to meet one person at a time instead =w=;;