Inspired by such institutions as Lamplight Labs and Toysense that I have come across in my time at FA, I have found the desire the create such a company myself, to give a grounding to some of the things my mind creates. As such, I am founding ICTL, a diverse company in my own little reality that does, well, a lttle of everything, exploring the boundries of science, and perhaps even magic.

At the moment thier most prolific work has been in the Bio-engineering lab, with it's latest success, codenamed the Retriever Unit. You can read the most recent report of the subject here. Though not exceptionally popular for it, ICTL often uses furry testing with their products, rather than animal testing. Though one would think it a very dangerous line of work, mortality rate is actually rather low, as there is a very strict set of guidelines for when and how such testing can commence. Because of the risk still involved, it is a rather well paying job with a great many benifits, but applicants must pass certain physical and psychological tests first. As the duties are quite unique, so too are the individuals qualified for the job.

As part of the program to maintain both physical and mental well being among testers, ICTL mandates that all testers fill out Tester Journal Forms, to help moniter the state of their minds as they test various products, processes, and other works. Detailed in the PDF above is a copy of one such journal, hand written by Jonathan Parlet, who is a current tester on the Retriever Unit project. Such first hand analysis is also of great assistance to our scientists, providing invaluable data. For ease of reading, the journals contents have been reproduced below.



Tester Journal


Tester: Jonathan Parlet

Project ID: Project #669-JRS

Project Designation: Retriever Unit

Entry #: 2


Once again, I gotta say that this job is certainly unique. I never thought I’d be doing something like this, much less, well, enjoying it. I am kind of a test subject after all, testing products with my participation. Or, something like that. It pays well though, with all sorts of benefits, considering all the potential risks involved. Odd work it may be, but to me, it’s worth it.

I was scheduled to test the new Retriever Unit again. That thing is just freaky. Even after testing it myself, it still feels hard to believe that the thing isn’t really dangerous. I mean, it looks like some sort of alien, like I mentioned last time. And, well, the last test wasn’t exactly something I wanted to repeat. But I’ve been checked out and cleared to go, and I had to admit that I was fine, even if it was the worst experience I’ve had as a tester here at ICTL. Dang near tempted me to quit, like I also mentioned last time. They at least gave me some free vacation days and some alternate testing gigs, but they finally tempted me back to the Bio-Engineering labs. Said the techs wanted personal insight like my last journal. Apparently, what I wrote last time was the kind of journal, or report, or whatever, they were looking for. Go figure.

Anyway, back to the point of this. I was understandably nervous, given what’d happened last time, and the fact that the guy in charge made the thing look like some kind of bear sized wolf didn’t help matters. It was understandable, I suppose, but it still didn’t do anything to quiet my apprehensions of going through this test again.

So, like it was last time, they were testing the thing’s primary function: to engulf and assimilate living creatures without long term harm. I still don’t understand how it does it, but it worked the last time I tested that facet, as my being here whole of mind and body will attest, but I get you have to keep testing just in case there’s a 1 in 500 chance of something unfortunate happening, and you’re not likely to know if you only tested 10 times. Unlike last time though, they didn’t just have me stand there and let it do its thing. They wanted it to chase me down, which I guess it’d need to do a lot of once it’s actually in use. It did explain why they were using the big room filled with all sorts of boxes and junk, and why I was the only tester there, in casual clothes no less. At least my clothes didn’t get ruined at all.

I got a head start, and though I honestly tried, I didn’t really think I had much of a chance. I mean, seriously, the thing doesn’t have muscles and technically doesn’t even have a fixed form. A few shipping crates weren’t going to slow it down much, and I could only run for so long. Fortunately for my legs and lungs (though perhaps unfortunately for my pride), it in fact didn’t take long for it to catch me. It seemed not five seconds after the tech gave the order (though maybe it was closer to ten; I wasn’t the guy with the stopwatch) then the thing caught me, even after all the turns I made. I swear I didn’t even hear it come up from behind, and I’m lucky I managed to get hands out in front of me before my muzzle hit the floor.

That’s something I think you should work on actually, the thing’s tactics. I know I’ve been told the thing’s only so smart, but if you want to promote this thing as a “no injury” way of capturing someone alive, using tactics that make someone face plant with a hard surface, like grabbing them be the ankle, isn’t the way to go about it. Grabbing my arm would have been a heck of a lot safer for me, and not that much harder for it.

Moving on, the thing went on to do what it was supposed to do. I’ll admit, part of my struggling was in trying to simulate what it was designed to capture (like my whole trying to keep away from it, for all the good it did me) and another part was from remembrance of the excruciating pain that had been a part of the last test that led me to transferring labs. But like last time, the swallowing part of it wasn’t painful. After tripping me up, it was all the way up to my knees with one snap of its jaws. Of course I only saw the motion, as the thing remained almost perfectly silent. It was so quiet it was almost creepy. Anyway, despite the apparent force, and the presence of fangs in its mouth, it didn’t hurt my legs at all. It felt more like from my knees down was stuck in deep mud, but with a bit more pressure. It was about as cool too, come to think of it. Maybe it’s better compared to quicksand, but I don’t have first hand knowledge of that fortunately.

I tried to pull my legs out quickly as it opened its mouth to get in more of me, but the thing was fast. It barely opened its mouth and quickly lurched forward nearly up to my waist, just under my, well, privates. Even if I had time, I doubt there would have been enough room to move my legs enough to get them out. At that point I knew it was pretty much over, but I at least tried to put up a fight. But I was in an awkward position, and when I finally got the idea to turn around to beat on it (which I already knew was ineffectual, but most people aren’t likely to know that and pulling myself out had already proven futile) it snapped up to my belly button, keeping me from rotating.

Unlike a real animal’s mouth, I could feel that the Retriever Unit was fully enveloping the parts of me that were in it, most notably the space between my legs. There was no moving anything that was inside of it. Okay, actually at this point I could move my feet a little, as they’d reached the area that passed for the thing’s “stomach”. I still wonder a bit why it does that and doesn’t use full restraint the whole time with a breathing tube. Something for you guys reading this to think about.

More detail would be superfluous at this point. My struggling and fighting was completely ineffectual, and its mouth simply widened to accommodate me when needed, always maintaining a gripping pressure without being uncomfortable. It wasn’t long before it gulped me down to its holding area, though having my head pushed through its “throat”, unable to breathe for about three seconds or so, was a little scary. I do think I slid down smoother this time though, and I finished my decent in a more comfortable position as well, but I couldn’t tell you if that was by design or coincidence.

I was actually kicking before I was fully in there, and now I put my whole body into pushing and kicking. My legs were both stronger and longer than my arms, so I just used my hands to try and give myself a more stable place to kick from. The problem with that was that there really wasn’t a stable place to put my hands down. The thing’s “insides” moved around like a waterbed being jumped on every time I shifted my weight. At the time I wasn’t considering how the thing, a being with a homogeneous composition, could create a pocket in itself like that, the walls perfectly smooth. That may have been part of my problem too; there wasn’t much friction to get any grip.

Once I reached full extension with my legs to no effect (which must have looked quite ridiculous from outside), I twisted around to get my head back towards where I came in, thinking to push myself up and out. However after all my efforts and it being pitch black in there, I couldn’t say for certain which way I was actually facing, and all the walls I touched were smooth. I actually managed to get full extension that way too with a bit of effort, but as far as I could tell the only thing I was really doing was stretching it out. It could have been lying down relaxing for all I knew.

That’s when it initiated the assimilation process. The walls of its holding area tightened up, forcing me into a fetal position, though surprisingly doing so rather gently. Once in position, it slid a length of itself into my mouth, gently but easily prying my muzzle open. I was squirming for all I was worth, as it had given me the room to do so, but barely. This was where the pain had begun last time. Much to my surprise though, as it slid down my throat and into my stomach and lungs, it didn’t hurt at all. Heck, I wasn’t even gagging, as I’m pretty sure I should be when something solid was stuck in my throat. Now that felt weird, kind of like hitting the pause button on life when someone was in the middle of swallowing a larger bite of food then they really should have. It was just a solid coolness that filled me.

It worked my stomach and my lungs at about the same time, but I’ll start with my lungs. As it entered, and began to fill it, I was overcome with an urge to cough that I couldn’t act on. It didn’t exactly hurt, but it was certainly uncomfortable. It could probably be compared to the feeling of drowning, though I never felt completely deprived of air. It actually took a bit longer to fill my lungs than my stomach, but once it finally did, I could feel it manually expanding and contracting my lungs, regulating my breathing for me. That wasn’t present the last time I tested, so this time there was no panic that my lungs had stopped working and that I’d surely suffocate. It still felt bizarre though to have my lungs filled with something solid, even if I was technically breathing just fine.

There was a mild discomfort as it filled up my stomach, but it felt more like I’d over-stuffed myself with food than anything else. It was also a, well, pleasurable sensation I’ll admit. It was like a sense of satisfaction at being full that I’d never truly experienced, knowing that I wasn’t going to be hungry for quite some time to come. I was sure that my belly distended just a bit from that, though when I managed that once in real life on a bet I felt sick rather than good. Once my stomach had hit the full point, it worked down through the rest of the digestive track. At that point, my squirming struggles were replaced by near convulsions from the ticking sensations of that particular movement. Of course, it was also hard to keep a straight face when I felt like I was constipated without discomfort, than shitting the thing out as it finally made its way out and into my pants.

Things become a bit less clear at this point, though I’ll relay it as best I can. Unlike last time, I wasn’t in any pain as the process really starting to get to work on the cellular, or maybe molecular or atomic level. In fact it almost felt like some sort of sedative was going through my system. I think it may have actually been pumping something into my stomach, or maybe directly into my system, but differently than the first time. Though I was still a little worried and worked up, my muscles eased their tension and loosened, and it gently guided me into an even tighter position. I think my muscles would have been a little sore and straining at that point normally, as I knew they were bent more than they should be, but like I said, there wasn’t any pain, but neither was I numb.

Once I was in that tight little ball, the holding area slowly shrank around me until it was nonexistent, simply and completely engulfing me within its form, with no air but what it was feeding into my lungs. Actually, I’m not sure if I even was still breathing at that point.

I was utterly relaxed, not even caring about my predicament, not even thinking I was in a predicament. I was comfortable like I had never been before. It was…well…such an enjoyable feeling. My head started feeling sluggish, but I wasn’t much in the mood to think at that point. Looking back, I’m pretty sure it was doing something to my head at that point, as that was the one more or less open area of my body I hadn’t felt it permeate in to. Maybe it was inside my skull, working its way through the fluid and creases in my brain. I do remember a very odd, but not unpleasant feeling in my head, but that’s the most I can remember.

That’s where the assimilation ended for me, as that’s where the memories of the process stop. I don’t even remember the reconfiguration process. I remember waking up, the feeling of being gently set down, and when I opened my eyes I was looking at the underside of the Retriever Unit, until it walked away. The lights seemed more glaring than usual for a few seconds, until my eyes adjusted. It also took a few moments for my brain to fully get back up to speed, as any long sleep usually does, which is when it registered that my clothes weren’t on me anymore, but laying on top of me. For decency purposes, if you could get the thing to put the clothes back on someone properly, that would be great.

I actually enjoyed the experience, I’ll admit. I told as much to the psychiatrist, a little embarrassed and confused at the whole thing, and he told me not to worry about, but to keep him informed after every test. Apparently I’m not the only one whose felt like this, at least since the prcess stopped being painful. He’d said he’d had to stop some people from taking the test because they wanted to do it again so badly. Glad I’m not like that, though I wouldn’t object if the opportunity was offered. I’m actually looking forward to the next test now, rather than dreading it. The whole thing was such a unique and intriguing experience, with so many sensations and feelings that, well, felt good. Whatever they changed since the last test, they certainly did it right.