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Story / Inflation
Species Dog (Other)
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Told you I'd make a fanfic involving Madarao. It does contain inflation and bursting, so I hope you all enjoy ^.^
All characters © Yellow Tanabe
All characters © Yellow Tanabe
Category Story / Inflation
Species Dog (Other)
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 6.9 kB
Ah, this was a fun little bit to read. I rather like the ending as well!
My only advice here would be to work on you flow. Combining some of the shorter sentences with conjunctions would make the piece feel less choppy and make it read more naturally. Other than that, it was great!
My only advice here would be to work on you flow. Combining some of the shorter sentences with conjunctions would make the piece feel less choppy and make it read more naturally. Other than that, it was great!
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