I like this story that i wrote.
Category Story / Animal related (non-anthro)
Species Wolf
Size 120 x 120px
File Size 1.4 kB
I read it, and i like the start, of it. its a good beginning and sounds like it sets up something even BIGGER.
My suggestion would be to expand on the chaper a little bit...
Maybe try to make it 2 pages with at least 5 paragraphs.
Break it down into sections and add more description to yourself and your brother.
maybe Describe your parents a little bit more... include early childhood memories.
if you were old enough to remember the fighting, then you were old enough to
remember other things as well.
Even if it seems mundane and routine to include these things, this little bit of
padding/fluff, will bring into full view the relationship between the siblings and
their parents. This is a VERY important Relationship as its the only one in the story
thus far, other than the STRONGER relationship of the Brothers themselves, which
you should focus on Elobarating on also.
Remeber in a story about Survival its important to know the characters "pre-survival" mode
so you can know to what extent they were taken care of... so the Dramatic change
can resonate with readers.
you have this Story in your head, its important for you to tell these Details and answer
questions the reader would have,
My suggestion would be to expand on the chaper a little bit...
Maybe try to make it 2 pages with at least 5 paragraphs.
Break it down into sections and add more description to yourself and your brother.
maybe Describe your parents a little bit more... include early childhood memories.
if you were old enough to remember the fighting, then you were old enough to
remember other things as well.
Even if it seems mundane and routine to include these things, this little bit of
padding/fluff, will bring into full view the relationship between the siblings and
their parents. This is a VERY important Relationship as its the only one in the story
thus far, other than the STRONGER relationship of the Brothers themselves, which
you should focus on Elobarating on also.
Remeber in a story about Survival its important to know the characters "pre-survival" mode
so you can know to what extent they were taken care of... so the Dramatic change
can resonate with readers.
you have this Story in your head, its important for you to tell these Details and answer
questions the reader would have,
FA+

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