~~Story time~~

The hard clicking sound of uneven hooves echoed against the marbled floors throughout the wide corridors of the interior of the colossal castle. Lights that hung overhead illuminating the walls with a soft, white glow. It was late, late enough where only he and a few guards were awake. He needed some peace after how his day ended. Abaddon had his arms down at his side, a distant, empty look in his singular eye with his head tilted downwards. However, even with only one eye, the amount of sorrow behind them was undeniable. Each step wracked his body with pain, but he didn’t care.

He was limping.

While from the outside nothing was wrong with him, it was only because Apex had rushed his healing process again. He did that often after a serious beating.

Physically he looked fine, but he still felt every part of him that ached, yet somehow, he still craved his mentor's approval. His attention. He hadn’t realized it, but he had stopped walking. Why did he stop? Had he meant to? For a moment, he only raised his head up enough to stare forward, his thoughts from the past few hours clouding his mind so much he didn’t feel the loving clawed hand on his arm or his name being called.

“Abby?”
“…”
“Abaddon.”
“…”
“Abaddon!”

When the voice was finally able to reach his ears, he instinctively flinched at the volume, tails stiffening in their normally flowing movement. Turning his head, the demon was met with the caring, yet worried eyes of his husband, Enigma. Black, void holes met his own, but he was still so mentally absent, he didn’t see the sudden look of shock in his lover’s face. “Pumpkin, why are you crying?”

Crying? He wasn't crying.

But as he slowly reached a hand up to touch his face, he was indeed met with the wetness of tears and damp fur. The glowing white tears streamed down his face. So that was why he thought his vision looked blurry. He had assumed it was from Apex’s side effects of healing. “It’s not the end of the world, Enigma. I’m fine.” The god of famine only felt his concern grow deeper as Abaddon shrugged off his gentle grip with hollow words. His touch.
His body screamed at him to just bury his face into his husband’s bush-like mane. To let him comfort him, love him with soft words and compassionate embraces. But his mind was still reeling from his confrontation with the Anti-god. So instead, he simply turned away, even as his metaphorical heart twisted in crushing guilt. “It very well could be, Abaddon.” Came the firm, yet light retort of the god.

To this, the demon stopped, the tears never ceasing their rampant falling. “It already happened a long time ago.” His voice was beginning to break, and not wanting to allow any further discussion, he walked away, leaving a very troubled, stunned deity in his wake. However, he didn’t pursue the demon. He knew he needed some time.

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Ahhh, some good ol’ angst featuring Abaddon and Enigma (I do plan on drawing them be happy tho, don’t worry). Anyway, this is sort of a behind the scenes of when Abaddon isn’t being, well, evil. While it may not be portrayed a lot, he does have a ton of weight on his shoulders being basically a prodigy to the ruler of all demons. Many demons are jealous of this, but it isn’t as great as anyone thinks. It’s traumatic, dangerous, and damages the mental state of whoever is training beneath him. He doesn’t always enjoy it, but, despite being literally tortured by his mentor, he can’t get enough of needing to please him. It’s like a addicting drug that can’t be kicked.
(Bo Burnham’s song “All Eyes on Me” was great inspiration for this scene).