It took me a while to get around to reading this, but I'm glad I did - this was fantastic! The premise was interesting and really well executed and the writing quality was overall quite high. It also conveys emotion incredibly well, and despite it being hours since I've read it, I'm still thinking about it. It was a great read, and probably one I'll return to!

Thank you so much! n.n

I'm unhappy with how I articulated my first comment, so at the risk of being redundant, I'm giving it another shot. I apologize if it's too much of a ramble, haha

I wasn't too sure what to expect going into this, but it ended up being pretty emotionally impactful. When Rienne cried after looking through the crystal at the Gardenvale Overlook she knew, I cried with her. The whole time reading, I was wondering how she may have felt about the inability to visit her parents' graves, so I was expecting more of a bittersweet moment, but (thankfully) that's not really what I got. Although it's nowhere near what she had to go through, I've certainly had my own rather negative experiences growing up, and I think that made the catharsis in her throwing the crystal - effectively her old life - into the field, letting go of it all, and subsequently being embraced by her "sisters" more apparent and impactful for me. I really admire that scene in general, it was really emotional and sweet!

There's a lot to be said for how you've crafted such vivid atmospheres, as well. The oppressive city that Rienne resided in was described incredibly well, and it really felt bleak. The literal darkness of it all was a large part of that; I really like the concept of the sky "breaking" (though I assume that to just be an excuse given by the government or Rienne's own misinterpretation rather than fact) and being replaced by a large dome that blocks everything out, and the effects of it were conveyed brilliantly! Along with the technology displayed everywhere, most notable of which to me were the holographic displays on graves which I can only imagine would be utterly haunting to experience, it makes for a very believable world that feels well fleshed out, but not over-explained.

The contrast, then, to the atmosphere of Cerine and Erin's world is wonderful! It was described in a way that felt very inviting, but a sense of familiarity was scarce enough that Rienne's confusion felt integrated into the world. The details regarding her inexperience with elements of that world helped a lot in that as well. The two I remember most were her eyes being unable to adjust to the harsh sun for a long time, simply because it doesn't seem that obvious of an aspect to consider, and the scene in the convenience store where she says "I don't have dollars" was funny and the awkward wording illustrated well how oblivious she was to the concept.

I'm not great at analyzing literary devices or anything, but there were numerous points where your descriptions were just super well done. The one that stood out to me most was the feeling of swapping dimensions; it felt like it conveyed the abruptness of the event very well, and read suitably alien.

I'd also like to mention that I'm quite glad that weight gain stuff was saved for the sequel story. I think it would have been incredibly out of place and only serve to significantly harm the tone of the whole thing.

I could probably go on for longer, but I think I've made my point lol, I really really enjoyed this story! Weight gain stories and such are cute and all, but this was a very welcome breath of fresh air, and the execution was spectacular!

I'm really happy to hear you enjoyed it so much! n.n The ending was pretty difficult for me to write.

The holo-graves were one of my favorite elements, too. Sometimes things just pop up as I'm working and they just fill in beautifully XD

Some seriously good stuff here. You don't really think about things like adjusting physically to other worlds. Of course Rienne would start out mostly blind, she's used to a dark (Literally) Cyberpunk dystopia.

Thank you! n.n

WElcome. And I saw the other two ones for her. I have a feeling she's going to have a lot of growing to do in the new environment and with help of her new family. ;)