All I can say is thank heaven's I'm a lynx. And the guys who piss me off are scared little rabbits.

Something I forgot to mention: Building sites. If they're gonna be putting a LOT of dirt somewhere, that's where to hide the body. Especially road construction sites.

Also, you can burn the body, drive out into the countryside, and scatter the ashes in a field. They'll never find the body.

Interesting, however burying the body on concrete is not recommended without some precautions. Concrete will NOT contain the smell, and the old excuse of "I wanted to give my art a certain odeur" doesn't work; believe me.

You could just leave the corpse on the subway. I had a neighbor suggest using it for chum on the open ocean.
The very best method is human combustion. You wrap the body in cloth and light it. The cloth acts like a wick. I saw a demonstration using a pig corpse. This method even destroys the bones.

Scary humor. :)

you're a dangerous mind, Karno.

OMG Love the warning against necrophilia at the end :D

*makes note of the suggestions*

And more frightening is, I'm not even kidding...

R.

lucky me i live next to a river so i can always pull the old mafia move. ;)

ooo i like the backyard one. i've got seventeen acres just waiting for guests XD

You skipped over one of my favorite methods, taking the body down to a pig farm. :3

Always be wary of a man who owns a pig farm.

Sell the stiff to a Dr. Frankenstein wannabe, and let him take the rap!

Most places need organ donors. Shouldn't be too difficult to switch so long as said organ is undamaged

Karno's basement must have only two things; Plastic covering EVERYTHING, and a wood chipper. :)

I preferr to collect them...I put them in glass-jars at my place...they make nice decorations for my laboratory

art faggots *LMFAO* XD This is one of your best strips yet!

Suddenly they all come out of the woodwork to discuss their preferred body removal technique XD Furs are scary things!

Awesome image, I adore twisted humour!

- I disagree with the "throwing of a skyscraper" method. A human body has a terminal velocity of around 200 kph, shattering all bones on impact, but a good coroner will still find the bullet wound. And possibly the bullet.
- Most buildings of reasonable size have CCTV systems nowadays so they will find out who carried the stiff one up (or out) and when.
- The mentioned pig farm works if you know/are the farmer.
- Most commercial concrete buildings built nowadays have a standing time of around 30 years. They might find em eventually if dumped into concrete. And sometimes dogs can smell it through the stone. Use a big foundation (or pillar) of a bridge, dam or similar infrastructure building instead if available.
- If you chop em up and freeze them, dont let them there too long. You'd be surprised how many corpses the cops find stashed in freezers.
- Do not dump corps parts into normal garbage or the sewers. Sewage water treatment plants and garbage processing sites have human workers watching the processing that regularly find those things and call the cops!
- Same goes for mail handlers and postmen. They do have noses. And sometimes they use devices to sniff for explosives. Those can be set off by leftover traces of blackpowder or nitrocellulosis from the gunfight! Don't send body(part)s per post or parcel.
- The human incineration mentioned works, but dont walk away for the firefighters to arrive. Sometimes remains stay. Burn at a place of your discretion that you can clean of leftovers afterwards.
- A good old crematory works, too.
- Can be improvised with old Freddy style ovens found in basements sometimes..
- Again, check ashes and dispose of bones dicretely (Not sewage, Not public garbage)
- I heard of a guy that fell into a sulfuric acid tank at a chemical plant. they only found out because the glas of his watch clogged a filter on the outlet. It was the only thing that didn't dissolve.
- Also usually staying behind after burning / dissolving are artificial implants like pacemakers or artificial hipbones. Make sure to check for those, they make identifying corpses real easy since they are very personal, registered, and not too common.
- A blender / meat grinder is a good idea, especially if you have a pig or a dog (or a good appetite) (or a cheap restaurant).
- If you have no time and you need to leave the corpse behind, make sure the evidence says the stiff one shot first. Firing a gun in his hand works. make sure to put the corpse in a realistic stance for that so if anyone checks bullet trajectories they look realistic. Then move body around and push it a lot, so they think the handling traces where because of attempted CPR, not because of you faking evidence, that always looks good in court.
- Still wear gloves of course.
- Which you dispose of discretely.
- Avoid being seen, catched on CCTV, or leave traces.
- That includes your mobilphones. Have them switched off, while doing business. They are traceable even afterwards.
- Think before you act. Its way better to stay thirty seconds longer at the scene of action and leave no traces than coming back later and run right into a trap of the FBI. Calm, Breathe through 6 times, then make your decision.
- Have a voodoo doll with hair and spit of someone else you don't like? These ingredients actually come way handy to be left behind as fake (ie not yours) DNA on the stiff one. Could be more efective than just stitching needles into the doll, but do that too, just to make sure ;)
- Fingerprints are more difficult to fake, its better to simply leave none.

... to be continued ...

You must've had and interesting childhood growing up to cultivate such an open and unhendered mind and outlook on things Karno.

As my alter-ego has 10 brothers (one of which is kept out of such matter being too young and relatively innocent), that gives 10 major styles of killing and dealing with corpses.

If you know somebody who cultivates carnivorous plants, you could always toss the body into the garden as a form of 'fertilizer'!