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Happy Valentines Day
by Fifty4
Digital Artist
16 years ago
I appologize for my sudden absense and didn't tell you guys. I have just been out of it for the last few days. I'll start from the beginning.
Sunday was the Valentines day and I decided that I would admit my crush for Apple to him that day. I had forgotten that this weekend was also Asian New Years. My pa's side of the family celebrates it a lot. I had completely forgotten about it and I only just found out about it the night before. So I had a lunch party, a festival, and a dinner party at my relatives 2 hours away from my home. We also went to a buddhist temple for my relatives because they are religious. I was away from home all day that day so I didnt get the chance to see Apple. I did try to call him though, but that was where things went wrong.
I tried to call him several times, but his phone kept on going to voicemail. So I tried calling Gunner asking where Apple was but he didnt know where he was. Then I called Blue and thats when he told me that Apple was on a date with this one girl from our class. It also turns out that he has probably been dating her for at least a month now because Blue saw them both really close together at the New Years party a while back. As for why Apple hasn't been picking up his phone, Blue suggested that they were doing something "dirty" and that upsetted me. ><"
I dont know, ever since that call, I have been really depressed lately. My school is on its break this week so I have just been home doing nothing but sleeping and watching the first season of Supernatural on dvd because Apple wanted me to watch it and lended it to me. I don't know what to do anymore. u__u
Sunday was the Valentines day and I decided that I would admit my crush for Apple to him that day. I had forgotten that this weekend was also Asian New Years. My pa's side of the family celebrates it a lot. I had completely forgotten about it and I only just found out about it the night before. So I had a lunch party, a festival, and a dinner party at my relatives 2 hours away from my home. We also went to a buddhist temple for my relatives because they are religious. I was away from home all day that day so I didnt get the chance to see Apple. I did try to call him though, but that was where things went wrong.
I tried to call him several times, but his phone kept on going to voicemail. So I tried calling Gunner asking where Apple was but he didnt know where he was. Then I called Blue and thats when he told me that Apple was on a date with this one girl from our class. It also turns out that he has probably been dating her for at least a month now because Blue saw them both really close together at the New Years party a while back. As for why Apple hasn't been picking up his phone, Blue suggested that they were doing something "dirty" and that upsetted me. ><"
I dont know, ever since that call, I have been really depressed lately. My school is on its break this week so I have just been home doing nothing but sleeping and watching the first season of Supernatural on dvd because Apple wanted me to watch it and lended it to me. I don't know what to do anymore. u__u
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I...don't know what else to say...sorry. *pats*
did you think he might be interested? the thing is unless a guy friend gives you reason to suspect that he's gay, assume that he's (statistically more likely to be) straight -- in which case (unless he's very bi-friendly) it might be best to only admit your crush on him in very non-pressuring casual ways.
i had a friend that i was very enamored with, and i knew he was mostly straight, so i only told him i had a thing for him till much later when that all sorta fizzled out. i wish you the best of luck. you'll find somebody-
I guess now that he knows that I am gay and that he is already taken, it would be okay to casually admit I crushed on him? =(
else to crush over... ya know.. somone who's gay >.>
Tho i do understand your pain. ive had a few occasions where i was
DEEPLY crushing over guys. But of course, i usually saw them making
out with girls in the hallways or somthing like that :/
Its up to you to tell apple however. I just dont know how well things
will go over.
Have never felt strongly enough about anyone in that way to care. As a result, am entirely unsure of how to relate to your feelings and therefore offer some kind of advice or support.
As far as your 'sudden absence' gos, don't worry about it in the least, people come and go quite a bit in these here parts so there is no need to apologise for it.
Be careful though. If you care for Apple as a friend, more than a crush, perhaps it would be best to test the water peior to addmitting to the crush. Something like that can make a friendship more distant, and it can be best to approach with caution.
With regards to his phone keeping on going to voicemail, there could be many reasons for it, and it would be best not to jump to conclusions. Fantasy is always stranger and more intense than fact.
It would be very easy to approach the situation, and just ask him what he did during Valentines day because you had attempted to call and didn't get through. He would then answer most likely, though it might be best for you to prepair yourself. Worst case scenario and all of that, if he did say something that upset you, then you could potentially get upset and then one thing leads to another, yeah. Caution is usually the key in these situations.
Unfortunately your feeling depressed could also be linked to watching Supernatural, because while it is an entertaining show, you are watching it, and even have it at the moment because of Apple. As a result of this, you would at least in some part be thinking about him, and thinking about what happened, thus adding to your feeling down.
Hope that you feel improved soon, and wish you the best.
I suppose it would be best for me to ask Apple about it. It would be very discrete to simply ask him about V-Day because I was trying to reach him. I will prepare my best for that moment. =( Thank you <3
As for Supernatural, I already finished watching it. It is a very good show. ;__; I do agree thinking about it now, that it might make me sad because it is from Apple. u__u
Again thank you for your advice. It is very much appreciated <3
With regards to asking Apple about V-Day, if you want, with your background you could say, "I tried to call you to wish you a happy Chinese New Year, but you were busy/didn't answer." Easy way to avoid any kind of conflict.
Supernatural is very fun indeed. Though you should try out Burn Notice, for a fun and action filled with actually clever writing show. A fantastic show. If you can find it that is.
Good luck with whatever it is you decide to do.
I'll try to talk to him again soon. =(
The person I've been after for a while has been dating a girl for a good 9 months or so by now, And it just killed me when I found out about it. But its one of the hardest parts of being gay, and its usually something to deal with. (for me at least)
But if it comes to pass that he doesn't feel the same way, best thing I can say is at least be happy that he is happy with someone, even if it isn't you. Its not something thats easy to handle, but if it doesn't work out between the two of them, you can be the first one to be there to comfort him :)
Gay guy is gay, and the straight guy isn't allowed to be upset?
As for the second part of your comment, nobody said that the straight person can't be upset. But it would be messed up if they stopped being friends because of it. Same thing if the gay person stopped being friends with the straight person because he was straight.
Things are more complicated than the way you put it. First off, the reason that the Gay person is upset is a completely different reason than why the Straight person would be upset. Unless the straight person has a crush on the gay person as well, which wouldn't make any sense.
I guess I can appreciate that you are trying to point something out, but I don't appreciate that you seem to be pointing me out as the bad guy here.
oh noos T.T *DESPAIRS* it cant be DX
that makes me soooo sad
i can but dont want to fully imagine how you feel D:
*hugs close and pets your pet* its okay, just take it one day at a time
this is going to hurt a lot v.v
Just hang in there. What you're going through is something many of us have undoubtedly felt at one point or another. You'll get through it. /hug
Fifty, I know you must be inconsolable at the moment, but be strong. I understand why you're so depressed. My question is that why didn't he tell you? If he's been dating this girl for a month, shouldn't you've known about it? Talk to him, maybe not tell him how you feel, but ask him about this girl. WHy is itthat you don't know about him (and pray to god he's bi)
Hearing that the guy you like is off on a date with a girl can be very heart wrenching, I detested that feeling myself. :c
It may be something hard to get used to but, to put it bluntly you just have to get used to it really. I really hope you feel better this week. Try and get out and do something with other friends? Do something to take your mind off it. Maybe you'll feel a bit more at ease.
I know how that is, sweetie... to want someone you can't have. It gets easier to deal with. Go out and have some fun with your other friends. That'll help
I think...still that you should tell him, it is important to you that he should know, I don't think that you should let a minor detail bring this to a crushing halt.
But umm. feel free to ignore me, I'm just an idiot xD
I hope you feel better about t. Or work it out with him. <3
if he's not gay you gotta move on, even if it's hard! good luck man :3
Play the waiting game, and see how things go. This will preserve your friendship, however Apple may hit it off strong with the girl and stay with her. That's the risk of it.
Or, you could play flip option. This one is a little harder and more intricate. The "flip" will be stealing Apple away from his date, and at the same time, making him realize any feelings for you. Nothing heavy, you understand. Take him out on dates, show him great times. He wants to do something? Do it. He doesn't want to do something? Ask what he'd want to do then. Cater to his every whim and make him feel like a king, more than the girl he is dating ever could. The risk, of course, is that if you lay things on too strong, he might realize what you are doing. So, be wise about it, and you can pull this off without him even knowing what you are doing.
As for the current moment, depression moves in on a mind that is inactive. The hardest part to getting over depression is to actively pursue a project or action. Go out and visit Gunner, or sit down and work on a comic, something that will get your mind off things, or, something that will get the gears in your head rolling.
I wish I could offer more help. I'm sure you'll be fine though. I wish you the best of luck, good sir.
When it comes down to it, do you think it's odd for a person to give another person a rose, or a box of chocolates, or anything like that? No, it's something that occurs every day. Now, doing this suddenly to someone you have just met might startle them, but when you do it with someone you've known for a while, they will be able to accept it more easily. Taken slowly, friendship can turn to love. Showing someone your true feelings, your true desires isn't a horrible thing, and honestly, wouldn't you do anything at your love's beck and call? That, good sir, is part of the flip game. The "flip" part means to flip the tables. If someone is dating someone else and happy, it's not a good idea, however, to flip the table on a toxic relationship puts you in the good as the shoulder to lean on, not to mention, you should be the shoulder to lean on anyway for a friend that you care that deeply about.
The flip game is only dangerous when played in an absolutely deranged manner. I'm sure that with Fifty's caring nature and shyness, he wouldn't be the one to shove things in that direction. I do believe he has the subtle touch to pull it off properly, hence why I suggested it. I have the utmost confidence in him.
Alright, then we have to spy on Apple and make sure he's unhappy with the relationship! That's where Fifty comes in and STRIKES!!!
Gotcha, I understand what you mean, but there's still a lot of "ifs"... in the end, all we can do is watch, eh? See how it unfolds...and, if Fifty is the same kind of person he is online, he'll do awesome! :3
For now though, I have been trying to stay positive and considering my options ^^
sex and dating doesn't mean there's love! You must not let him go!
You'll have to tell him what you feel someday, it can still work.
just keep in mind not to break it all to him flat out when you talk to him, i'm sure though he won't think less of you as a friend, judging from his reaction from when you told him about your orientation i do not think he will act in a harsh way.
I'm REALLY sorry this happened to you. This has happened to me a couple times before, so I know where you've been.
Hang in there, 'kay? :3
it's weird because I went to a temple too =o (moms side) and I really wanted to tell someone on Facebook I liked them. But I couldn't find him :(
I had that happen with girls I liked quite a few times.
Well, as I'm sure many above have already said...there will certainly be others, my friend. =/
ALSO, this won't end your friendship; however, it will be painful if you continue to think on what could be. =O
I hope everything turns out okay, Fifty! (>.<)
oooh...very sorry to hear that deary *hug*
I second the advice about not gambling with your friendship, better to keep what you have then to risk it on having more. I am not going to tell you (nor should anyone else) to forget the whole thing and try to move on...doesn't work that way.
So until you can make the big reveal (how you feel or felt, depending on future circumstances), if you write down things that bug you...do that or if it helps talk to your reflection (very effective with low-self esteem...but that is irrelevant)...whatever will best help you relieve the tension of those ever growing feelings and the pain from not being with him (as I am certain there is going to be, if not already)
I truly hope everything works out for the best or better than just "best", because seriously...that is on the top 10 shitty things cupid and fate to do to anyone undeserving such as yourself. (then again fate doesn't have a good record...nor cupid)
Hang in and chin up, things always get worse before they get better (well that is my pseudo-observation anyways <_<) *hugs*
anyways, hopefully this is helpful...not repetitive and at the very least help cheer ye some, because trust me...you need all the cheering you can possible get or more.
of course and I hope you do or I will seriously hunt down fate before murderlizing them with there own damn scissors.
If not, it would still give you closure...which is important, rather to have it done than regret it or however that phrase goes.
Still, high school dating usually dosn't last. There's a good chance that Apple might not hit it off too well with this girl despite any chance of "nasty" things going on.
Time will tell, who knows
There's still a chance for you.
Tell yah what, I'll do a lil bit of fanart for you.
And thank you for the fanart. It was surprising, but it made me smile. ^^
sorry if my advice is redundant
-j.p.
Anyways, all in all try to not put too much hope into things one way or another. It still doesn't hurt to hope though. :3 I'm normally an optimistic guy even if I do get my down times. As long as there is breath in your body there will always be hope for better days to come. ^_^ I wish you the best of luck.
Sorry about the lengthiness of my post. ^-^; Hope this helps in one way or another, or was just entertaining to someone. :P
but remember
the world its big =0=
A good number of my friends are gay. a couple have had crushes on me. If Apple, like me, is willing to be your friend and knows fully well that you are gay, then he will probably be ok with your feelings.
A comment earlier spoke of unrequited love being the type that never fades away. That person is right, but let me tell you why: He's right because this is an issue that has never been resolved. When we have those, they gnaw at us and don't let go.
So, I think it is fair to guess that Apple is straight, but that does not mean you should not tell him. You should speak with him. When it's said and done, it may hurt, but it will be resolved and the pain can slowly fade and the wounds can heel.
Let me tell you something: There aren't very many people that are good at hiding things. I would lay you odds that this Apple knows, atleast on some level, how you feel after all this time. He is probably ok with that but also is probably ok with saying nothing and acting as iff, aswell cuz I bet he doesn't want to hurt you and knows he'll have toif you ask. This has happened to me. You know what though, I hate it when I know a friend likes me but won't just talk about it straight up with me.
It's like living a lie and our friendship just becomes awkward. I prefer to be asked, have the chance to say no, but do so with kindness and grace, and then it's done, it's resolved, and we can both move on, and hopefully in friendship.
So the worst case senario is he doesn't want you as a friend. Well, if that happens, first of all, he's not a kind person and not someone you should look to as a friend anyhow, and second of all, it's still said and done and out in the open and everyone will be able to breath easier.
Living a lie is not anyway to live, kid. Tell him the truth, talk it out, and gracefully accept his answer. then, what ever the outcome, you can find some peace.
Good luck.
p.s. hmm OHHH HES BI! just wait till your both 21 and doing a little "late night buddy drinking" lol
if you're saying how you feel about him, you're burying yourself in a grave. I'm sorry to hear it but... I hope you have prepared for this. I dunno how you gonna say that you have feeling on him, but one point is critical: your friendship. You're gonna gamble it. But don't expect a romance of a friendship. If you're holding on a friendship though, you have to deal that you gotta forget him anyway. You're gonna gambling your friendship over a confession or you're gonna living a lie over pretense that he's not your crush.
Either way, he's done it with a girl. It's kinda odd to hear that he's been dating for a month and not telling you about it. But anyhow, i hope it will grow you up and stregthen up your heart a bit. Welcome to the world of romance, where everything nice happens only in 1% of human population. Obviously, we're not faced to the easy way *hugs*