stop saying things like that love.... it was good, it really was, I liked it! You should write more of these shorts, and your skills will improve more and more as well

It was good, and is a good start! I just have some advice/critique if you want. ^^

Sure, go ahead..

I understand exactly what you are trying to do here, but there is one issue. The happenings are a bit decentralized, a little too sweeping and vague. The number one thing to do when describing and detailing events is to show the reader, not to tell the reader. Basically, don't tell the reader that "he is sad and angry with his friend" but instead try something like "he glared at his friend with clenched fists as tears rolled down his cheek." It's an issue many writers and poets have to "exercise" out of their works as they do more and more drafts. Everybody does it in the first draft, I have many notebooks filled with big epic "look what's happening!" first drafts that are inevitably far shorter and more nonsensical than the later drafts. I think you got potential, and I think all you need is to just write more. I write virtually every day, even if it's just a sentence or two, or even ten pages on a really good weekend. Just don't give up!

Ah okay then.. I'll keep that in mind then... For my age, I should be writing something much better I know..

You're only 18 dude, don't stress it! How many years have you been writting?

Actually I'm 16 I've been writing for about... Well, not professionally for long at all really x3

You just need more experience, then, and more critiques given to you. I've been writting for 14 years, since I was 5, and have had the benefit of available sources that are willing to give harsh and constructive critisism. It's good critisism that helps initiate growth, but it's the writer who will make the decision as to how he actually developes.

Well... I've been writing my whole life... But not really properly. I'm just always too lazy to write. I'd prefer to just talk in a mic and have the computer type it for me x.x Ah well. If you keep reading my stories, I'll keep writing them.

It's a deal then. I'm sorry if I do go through periods where I don't, though. Reading is time-consuming and I have to do a lot of it for college. XD

hehe, I'm gonna have to do the same. I'm gonna be studying History and Film... Which will include Screenplays and Plot outlines.

Oh and thanks!!

Heh, welcome! I'm studying Aesthetic Philosophy and Literature... looks like we both have a full plate. ^^