Your world and universe seems well deputed and interesting with its details. I believe you have done a good job in developing. Your style was very good for the work, and the narration was cold and menacing and nonchalant until it built to grand crescendo and climax in the end. Thus was the opening very captivating and grand to the senses of the woes of Clan Mirr'cha. Beyond that as a small glimpse and mini installment it is hard to give a well rounded critique. There was little character development, almost none, but other installments, or larger texts would have more. Beyond that the action description was good, and your SF tech bad ass. So as a mini of a larger series it did well. As most universes go, the more depth and detail the better, and you seem to be on the right track. So I wish you the best with the rest.

Thanks.

I'm mostly trying to properly establish my own writing style before really delving into a larger chapter that would combine all the various elements one would expect.

I'm also using these little mini sections to help flesh out the setting as a whole as well as help me set up a time line of sorts. This particular bit was intentionally vague on some details however as they are intended to tie into the larger picture at a later date. I'm actually glad to hear that at least some one found the naration cold and menacing, as it is intended to be.

I've found in all the books that I've read over the years, many touch upon large scale intergalactic battles, but few deal with the after effects of those very same battles. A good chunk of the setting is intended to be presented in a sort of post apocalyptic universe that touches on just those very concepts. At the same time, I'm trying to keep things somewhat believable.