Had a weird dream about someone getting baked into a giant slice of berry pie so of course I wrote a story based on the idea. No actual cooking involved, more of a cartoonish situation (that ends in permavore).

Professor August teaches his student Jon a delicious lesson in the importance of keeping up with his magic studies...

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The Professor’s Dessert
By: Indi

Jon feared the worst as he walked into the classroom. The brown bear was a student at the mage college, and he admittedly hadn’t put much effort into his studies the last four years. He’d coasted on low grades and not being an active troublemaker in class, while spending most of his time partying with peers.

And eating quite a few.

His robes were snug around his waist, his doughy belly wobbling as he walked. He’d been rather thin when he’d first arrived at the college, but people were fattening, and of course he’d plumped up in time. Plenty of other students--and professors for that matter—were guilty of the same, so he didn’t care too much. As long as he wasn’t the one adding to another waistline full-time he was fine.

Which was why he was nervous about the meeting with Professor August. August was a pudgy gray lion, his light blue vest always open to keep his soft middle exposed. He wasn’t known to be as openly voracious as other professors—like Profesor Hall, the tiger who’d spent the last couple months immobile after eating an entire scroll-writing class for cheating. Still, August’s weight fluctuated too much for him to not be eating someone every now and then, and enough of his students had gone missing for others to hold suspicions.

Though maybe Jon was just being paranoid. It wasn’t even the first time Professor August had asked to meet with him privately. He’d probably just give another speech about why he should try harder and suggest more study partners, advice Jon would promptly ignore. Yet he couldn’t help but wonder why they were meeting in a room usually used for culinary magic courses.

“Welcome, Jon.” Professor August was towards the back, near the large pantries for cooking ingredients. The lion had been skimming a book, which he promptly put down upon Jon’s arrival. A trio of glowing blue potions were on the table as well, clearly mana related. Maybe the professor was researching something?

“H-Hi Professor,” Jon said, his concerns gradually growing. “You wanted to talk, right?”

“Well it’ll be more of a lesson than a talk today, thankfully. Since you’re still struggling, I thought it might be a good idea to show you the benefits of having solid magical fundamentals.” August picked up one of the potions and drank it to the last drop. He let out a happy sigh afterward, a faint aura flashing around him briefly. The runes on his iron bracelet glowed bright, and suddenly a small swarm of ghostly paws were conjured around the professor.

Nothing Jon hadn’t seen before a dozen times in class, seeing as ghostly paws were Professor August’s specialty.

“Thanks to years of practice and dedication, I can manipulate all these paws at once with relative ease. If I’d slacked off, I’d probably only be able to manage a one or two at best, and their movements would be stiff. I wouldn’t even be able to secure an individual, like so!”

The paws suddenly darted towards Jon, who barely had the time to take a step back before they were upon him. His arms and legs were grabbed, the bear lifted off the ground, helpless. He struggled wildly, but the ghostly paws had overpowered him. “Let me down! What are you doing!”

Professor August drank the second potion, and seemed to perk up. He created another swarm of ghostly paws, which began digging things out of the pantries and drawers of the room. An oversized, wedge-shaped tin was retrieved, along with dough and tools. The paws rolled out the dough and placed it in the bottom of the tin.

“Now Jon, you should really be paying attention to the lesson—no interruptions.” A new paw clamped the bear’s mouth shut. “Becoming a proper mage really does require a lot of training, but the rewards are worth it! If I’d been lax like you, then I’d never be able to bake someone into a giant slice of pie like this.”

Jon’s eyes shot wide open, and the bear’s struggles intensified. Despite his wiggling, he couldn’t shake the paws, though. As he let out muffled shouts he was carried towards the pie tin. Other paws brought long strands of dough, which they wrapped around Jon tight to secure him further. Afterward he was placed in the tin, propped up in a sitting position.

“Oh don’t look so horrified—other professors have been angling to gobble you up for years now with how poor a student you’ve been. Really it’s a miracle you lasted this long.” Professor August was looking through his book again, which was filled with recipes. “You know, I think you’d make a delightful berry pie. Really, it’s fitting--a berry bear pie!”

Oversized berries were taken from the pantries and dumped into the pie tin, gradually surrounding and then covering up most of Jon. Only his shoulders and head remained above the fruity mass. A paw was still over his mouth, preventing him from begging or shouting or even whimpering. More dough was rolled out, laid across the berries and Jon in a crosshatched pattern. He was resembling a massive slice of pie more and more by the second.

“Course a good pie needs to be baked. But don’t worry, Jon, you won’t be sliding into the oven. I’m not cruel, after all! I happen to know a safe little baking spell that might make you a bit uncomfortably warm but no worse for wear—again thanks to actually taking my studies seriously.”

The berries and dough began to heat up, prompting more whines and struggles from Jon. But just as promised he never felt pain, just mild discomfort, even as the dough turned golden brown and steam rose from the cooked berries. Of course that didn’t change the fact he was trapped in a pie while his professor eyed him ravenously.

“And just like that I’ve made myself a decadent dessert.” Professor August licked his lips. “Such a shame you didn’t try to become a better mage. You might’ve been able to fend off such a basic attack if you had. Course then I wouldn’t have gotten such a wonderful, mana-filled treat. Guess it all worked out in the end, then.”

As the professor approached Jon, the bear cowered and whined.

***

Professor August groaned before licking berry filling off his fingers. He was on his side, his massive belly spilling out across the floor. It was still wobbling a little, but August doubted that’d last for long. Jon was likely buried in berries and dough by now. The feast had been a bit excessive and showy--even for him--but he regretted nothing. He was actually beginning to consider turning more of his problem students into delicious, fattening pies.

“Teaching has its perks, but nothing quite beats the—braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap—meals you get out of it~” August chuckled, rubbing his belly as he blushed at how large it was. He already couldn’t wait to see how fat he got from eating Jon. The bear was going to put such a wonderful extra jiggle in his step. He’d probably be waddling into his next class. And of course his appetite would increase, making it harder to resist scarfing down every plump pupil he passed. Perhaps his next pie would come sooner rather than later.