When you said you were "working on a redemption fanfic", I didn't think you meant a WHOLE NOVEL with uber-detailed exploration of the characters' inner workings and motivations... O_O And the best fanfic I've ever come across, hands down! If KFP weren't copyrighted I'd ask you to seriously hunt a literary agent for publication...

I haven't finished it yet (about 1/4 through), but I've started taking notes on narrative technique for my own future reference.

*had forgotten where he told you that, or that he had*

Indeed, when I do something, especially something I believe strongly in, I throw myself into it and don't come out until I've given it the attention it deserves. At times it was not easy, but in the end it was all worth it and taught me a lot more things--about narrative techniques, tropes, and also about myself.

Thanks for the high praise! I look forward to hearing more of your thoughts. :)

You mentioned it in the ISO group on LJ, when I made a post about KFP on 9 June 2008. :) I vaguely recalled something about that, so I looked it up!

Well, the following is what I've noted so far. This isn't meant to be a comprehensive list of everything you've done well in the story – rather, it's a list of everything that works, that I have never tried myself. Basically, it's a list of things I may want to try in future, for my own reference.

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Technical aspects of nievelion’s A Different Lesson:
1) Detailed description of the characters’ thoughts and feelings, like dramatic monologues. This does not rely heavily on reader intelligence and deduction (contrary to Beth Yahp’s narrative style), but is effective in creating reader empathy, especially if the character is sympathetic. Thoughts are frequently conveyed in “direct speech”.
2) The perspective of various characters is conveyed. Effective in providing a well-rounded view of events, and establishing facts as opposed to a single character’s biased viewpoint. Also keeps things interesting. In Chapter 14 Mantis’s thoughts are particularly idiosyncratic – good method of characterisation!
3) Chapters are episodic. Some chapters draw attention to a single event, e.g. fixing the roof in Chapter 10, in order to prove a point or illustrate a step in narrative progress.
4) Special attention is given to cadence, the prose flows beautifully.
5) Brilliant images! Tai Lung and Tigress unfurling the bridge with their chi... Tai Lung holding a delicate orchid in the shadows after meeting his younger self...
6) Cliffhangers! Many chapters end with a promise of something very dramatic to happen soon (like Chapters 3 and 13), or an intriguing image that requires further explanation (Tai Lung meeting his younger self).

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Ah yes, that explains why I don't remember (it was so long ago) but I should have realized it was there. Not like I have said much about it here, let alone a place where you could have seen it.

1) Yeah, I'm well aware that the style in which I wrote characters' thoughts and feelings didn't allow the reader to do much deducing, that I was spelling it out for them. Part of this was because of the complexities involved--I wasn't sure it could be figured out without me telling instead of showing, especially with my dense prose. Part of it was indeed to help you get in each character's head to see how they think and feel (and why). Part of it was dramatic tension (when you know for sure what a character is thinking and feeling, and how utterly wrong it is compared to the truth of the situation or another character's thoughts and feelings, you know something is going to go wrong--it's just a matter of when and how). And part of it is that's just my style. I'm glad it works for you, for a few of my readers it didn't.

2) That is exactly why I did it--to show multiple perspectives that both reveal and undermine individual biases. And because it is just fun to get in different characters' heads, especially when using direct speech the way I did. While clearly I enjoy Po and Tai Lung the most, Mantis was a real gem to use.

3) Episodic stories are hard to avoid when using so many characters and such a long narrative, and in fact most of the story can be broken down into arcs (Chs 1-9 is the set-up for Tai Lung deciding to stay at the palace, 10-17 is Tai Lung's new "training", and as you'll see it can also be broken into 18-23, 24-26, 27-31, 32-34, 35-37, and 40-43). But within and between those arcs, I really needed to do "day in the life" moments to show how Tai Lung was changing, to focus on other characters, to allow for introspection or showcase a battle.

4) Thank you! My prose used to...suck, so I am glad my hard work on it has finally paid off.

5) I've always been good at having images in my head. The issue has always been how to get them on paper, and how to do it right. (And of course, to do it with words, since I can't draw well at all, let alone to be able to produce what I see in my head.)

6) Comes from watching lots of Saturday morning cartoons, and reading lots of sci-fi and fantasy books. And it has a long and glorious tradition--just ask Charles Dickens, Ann Radcliffe, the Brontes, Scheherazade...

1) Well, I wasn't too fond of the explicit-thoughts-and-feelings narrative style before, since I felt that allowing the reader to deduce the characters' inner experiences (to an extent) made for a more satisfying read - almost like granting the satisfaction of solving a mini-puzzle, and respecting his intelligence. One impressive example of the latter method was Beth Yahp's "The Crocodile Fury" (why I mentioned her in my notes). However, reading ADL was a case of stumbling on a story that works so well that it forces you to rethink your opinion, and re-evaluate the narrative method in question. :) This happens rarely, as you can imagine, but it's always welcome when it does. I'm more open to the possibilities of explicit-thoughts-and-feelings now - evidently they do have a place in certain types of narratives.

3) Well, I shall have to keep note of these mini-arcs when reading!

4) I pay attention to cadence too, but it doesn't come easily to me, and sometimes it feels like I'm spending too much time on it instead of more important things like pacing or characterisation. :/ I dislike jarring consonants in prose...

5) The impressive images had a way of lingering with me long afterwards... Sometimes it was due to Sheer Awesomeness (to paraphrase KFP), and sometimes because of the macabre and mysterious elements they contained!

*nods* I understand. And in fact I do agree that showing not telling is generally the best way to go. Unfortunately I have never been that good at the former. Which just means I need to challenge myself more, I suppose. But I really haven't a clue what methods/exercises I can use to try and get better at showing. :/ In the meantime though, if all I can do is tell, I figure what I can do is just tell the best damn story I can, and make the thoughts, emotions, and events seem so real that you don't notice or care that it's being given to you directly. I guess I succeeded at that!

I know what you mean about balancing. Let's just say that early on I was so focused on trying to get my writing itself good that my characterization sucked. The one thing I think I did have early on was a good sense of pacing...I knew when to Make Things Happen and when to have a quieter scene of talking or traveling or whatnot. Luckily, once I was able to get great language, I was then able to focus on characterization. Longer road, but my intense focus still got me there in the end. An ear for dialogue was the last thing I got, I think. Apparently I don't listen well. :P

This will likely explain a few things, but the most intense images in any of my work almost always appeared to me in a flash, something very powerful and visceral I had to get on paper. This is especially true for Different Lesson. I'm not sure where you're at in your reading, but here are some examples of moments which came to me long before I got there in the narrative:

-The end of Chapter 19
-The moment with Tai Lung in the peach tree in 21
-The end of Chapter 24
-Almost the entirety of Chapter 30
-The big dramatic scene in 34
-The end of 37
-And almost all of the final battle

I was kind of expecting porn but I really like this. You dive into the psychology of the characters and their relationship very well. I was real disappointed when Tai Lung "died" at the end of the movie and I think you have a good premise there. I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes.

I wonder why you were expecting that? I thought about it, but I decided that mainstream wasn't ready for explicit gay sex and I don't feel comfortable writing full on hetero sex. So instead I focused on character and story, and left any sexual stuff to innuendo, circumspect language, and off-screen activities.

I was certainly disappointed to, as were many others. Glad you picked this up at last, though you'll be busy for a while...__