hey everyone! something i discussed on my personal fb earlier today got me really interested in asking people outwardly about it - i used to call my followers/fans owlets and like my little community my "nest" but i stopped when someone got offended by it like back in late 2013, haha. a little silly to do so, but i had a little message i sent on deviantart welcoming people to my page and thanking them for the support and how much i appreciated their interest in my work - back when i was just starting out and every watcher i got i could say by name (now there's so many of you, and im so grateful but my memory isn't what it used to be either ;;; ); i think they thought i was undermining them by calling them an owlet without consent. apparently i was calling them a child and they didn't want to be a part of my "themed" personal community.

i never meant it to be like condescending or mean or insensitive. owlets were the only thing i could think of in a tender, close manner that wouldn't be offensive (least i thought) to people. i could have called people my rat posse or pellet brigade. but that's like me saying i'd love to eat my friends and throw them up.

i wanted to start doing it again - if people didn't mind it? i wanted to give my following something to be a part of without being like... weird? i hate calling people my fans, it sounds so unpersonal to me. there's a lot of people now. not like, in a bragging manner or egotistical thought that im having. there's just a lot more than 100 like i used to have. i'd like for people to feel included, even if they're not directly associated with me. i used to be someone people could come to, could say what they thought without me juding them. some people still do - it gets a little overbearing and boundary crossing at times and people consider me like... a real mom. and i have to remind them that im here for them, and i can be a mother figure. but i am not their real mom lol, if that makes sense.

i'd like people to feel that warm, comforting feeling again. to come to my page, see my work and enjoy it, talk with me when i can respond back - interact and enjoy the small community i built. but i get flashbacks of people like that and i get worried that maybe im overstepping my own boundary and i shouldn't play mother to everyone when they didn't ask, hah.

still though -

i always felt like it made me more personal with my followers - it didn't feel weird calling them my owlets and my art pages my "nest", calling people fans and followers for some people - even myself - is fine! i don't mind being called a fan by people i admire. personally, i just feel weird calling people that though, because i consider my followers family. i don't consider them like strangers (even though most are), they're my supporters, people that are willing to help, buy my work, share my art, just comment or like a piece. and i don't want them to feel like they're not part of my little community. their part is just as important as mine. im not any better than anyone and im human, just like them. i want people to feel included without feeling scared to talk to me. people have called me intimidating for most of my life, and it does translate online. i might come off rude or prudish. but im just a very quiet, shy and humble (imo at least) person. my quietness is mistaken for weakness and ego, while my voice is taken as prideful and haughty - all because i don't talk much. i get overwhelmed a lot, and i need a lot of time to myself because i get that way. sometimes i go months without even talking to my best friend.

it gets to be a lot at times. but i think it'd feel less daunting if it was more in control to me, more personal. like hey, this is my art page, these are my followers. i made this. people can come and go as they please, i hold no resentment. but while you're here, you're my family. i might be a little quiet, but i do read everything even if i can't find the energy to respond or i don't have words to reply with that i can muster the courage to say.

but while people are in my life, in my community, they're my family. not fans, not followers. family.

i want people to enjoy my work, enjoy my small community, hold no fear and talk to me like a friend, not be scared to interact or address me. i want people to be okay with interacting with me, even if i can't respond. i want everyone to not be scared to outwardly talk on my pages. talk to me. it'd be nice to have a positive influence and community around me. i think it'd benefit me, and others involved. im tired of all the negativity in this fandom (both the furry and anime). it's so stupid. so much needless drama. we're all here, we're all doing our best.

so let's just draw and have a good time. that sort of thing.

what do you all think? i know people can mostly choose to ignore it or the terms i use. but i thought it'd be nice to ask about it - everyone on my personal fb loved the idea and couldn't imagine someone getting upset over it. but it does happen, but i think you can't even really breathe without offending someone now a days, haha.

so what do you think? would you all mind being a part of my tiny parliament (community), partake in interacting in my nest (pages/social sites), and being my owlets (fans/followers/etc)?

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