He he

Lady, thish ish no coshtume. Naow hold shtill sho I can burn holesh in your brain!

'nuff said ;)

NOW GIMME DEM NIBBLIES!

lol XD

He's like "WTF!?"

Every day is halloween in his reality Except the monsters are all REAL

tehe well cool

Isn't he precious! He better not take all the dark chocolate...I want that!

And what if he did eat all the dark chocolate? What then? You gonna go running home crying to mummy?

Don't make me get the pout video back out! Since I value my life, I assume crying to mother is all i can do. or buy my own bag...I didn't think of that.

You will cry. OH HOW YOU WILL CRY!! Delicious, sweet, salty tears of despair and horror... your tears, they feed me, they nurture me...

Then I will sneeze.

...and I will hand you a handkerchief. And say "bless you". And make you a nice, hot cup of tea.

With some crumpets.

With butter, jam and cream.

And a nice warm blankie to curl up on the couch with.

Aw, so sweet...in a British sort of way ;) I want a danish!

I will serve the streusel.

Streusel? Do you mean strudel? Oh man, Pete and I were just down at the supermarket next to our block of flats and they had berlinerbolle RIGHT. AT. THE COUNTER. I was so dying to buy some but Pete growled me

Jelly filled, sugar coated doughnut? Sounds good. I go for the Boston creme doughnuts, personally. http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&um=1&sa=1&q=boston+cream+doughnut&aq=1&oq=boston+cream+d&aqi=g2&start=0
I am a sucker for a good sugar cookie, too. Now I am hungry, dammit!

There are two sorts of berlinerbolle - one with berry jam inside the other with a sort of vanilla custard cream stuff inside. I prefer those - they are basically the same as your Boston creme doughnuts without the chocolate on top.

You are a man with refined tastes, Sir.

They make cakes with that stuff, too. It's plate sized doughnut. I am drooling all over my key board as i type this.

Oh man, I am SO jonesing for a doughnut right now it's not even funny!

if Jones has a car, i call shot gun!

Jones has a car, but it's in the garage because we have a supermarket (Called, ironically enough "Kiwi") right next door to our block of flats. And I got some berlinerbolle there a few minutes ago. The downside is they were horrible. The bigger supermarket down the road at the mall has much better berlinerbolle.
Can I sit on your lap in the shot-gun seat?

That's not the stick shift!


There are amazing stores here of the name "Wawa". amazing places with everything. EVERYTHING! I enjoy a nice cinnamon bun, and if it has apple filling, all the better...

Oh man, you and Jamie have GOT to come visit us here in Oslo sometime before we move back to NZ. We will take you up to Frognersteteren for some traditional Norsk Eplekake. I think you would find it right up your dessert alley.

Stern frogs with...epilepsy cake? I think I misread something...
A world tour of desert would be fantabulous!

I'd prefer a world tour of PIE. That would make me delirious with joy. No, nothing to do with frogs, serious or otherwise and the cake wouldn't give you epilepsy, but your taste-buds might convulse with happiness.

That would work just fine! I may sneak a muffin in that world tour, though <.<

I could bake you some banana-bran muffins? Nice, hot and steaming fresh with a dollop of butter...

Dollop away. Is this a ploy to keep me regular?
And if nuts even TOUCH the muffins, i am outta there! I hate nuts...
The product of plants kind.

I wasn't thinking of any other kind. Well, not unless you're wearing lycra at the time. Are you allergic to nuts, or just dislike the taste? I generally would not be inclined to add them to a recipe for muffins, which are supposed to be rich, moist and chewy, not crunchy in texture.

Exactly! You know the truth. I just dislike the lack of taste. it is gritty. Rich, moist and chewy...how I like my men!

Jamie is rich, moist and chewy You leave me in a very confused state with that statement - I am not sure whether or not to be turned on, or crossing my legs!

I do like crunchy peanut butter, but then peanuts aren't real nuts. Brazil nuts are gritty, as are macadamias.

I like my butter of nut peas smooth. SMOOTH I SAY!
I had a Brazil nut and nearly puked. I find them distasteful to say the least!

Yeah, not a great fan of them either. And smooth peanut butter is a tool of the devil.

I will spread the Devil's tool all around your apartment!

And I shall cover it in honey and eat it up. AHA! You didn't see that coming did you?

And I shall buy a tanker truck full of that "Fluff" you can buy in your American supermarkets, and fill your flat from top to bottom with it!

Oh, something that big...everyone sees it "coming". :D
I will never set foot in my apartment again. jamie loves that stuff. i hate it with a passion!

I tried it once, but couldn't quite figure out why anyone would want to eat it. It is almost pure sugar, and just wouldn't work on bread. So any possible use is lost on me. Jamie is welcome to keep it.

So what bread toppings do you like that others might consider odd?

I think I am pretty normal with bread toppings. I know a few people who were shocked to hear about peanut butter and bananas, but that isn't strange. It was a love of Elvis', though he liked them fried. I like honey horseradish on my sandwiches...is that odd?

I have no idea what honey horseradish is, so possibly not depending on what it is with. Unless you mean horseradishes and honey together, in which case we need to fit you for a straight jacket. As for PB & bananas... that is a little odd. Mind you, this is coming from someone who used to like mashed potato sandwiches

I like rolls and mashed potatoes, so your sandwichization of such is not odd.
Have you ever had horseradish sauce? Mix it with honey and add it to a turkey sandwich...WEEEE!

Cant say that I have, although now that you're talking condiments, that makes a lot more sense and isn't quite so culinary horrific Mashed spuds with milk, butter and cheese, covered with fresh cracked black pepper makes for a glorious winter comfort food... especially if you cover it with gravy... OM NOM NOM!

I used to hate mashed potatoes when i was young. I also hated steak, but have since changed my ways. Oh, the foolishness of the wee ones!

Hmm, interesting - loved both of those things as a spawnling and still do. Although back then I used to eat fish as well, but I cannot stand the stuff now. Funny how your tastes change over the years.

Very true. I hated tomato soup, but learned to love it in school. I brought my lunch and bought lunch at the cafeteria. There was never enough food, so I ate what was served and eventually started liking tomato soup after forcing myself to eat it all the time. *hugs his metabolism*

Well you were a growing lad, you needed all the sustenance you could get. Norweegies love their tomato soup - although it is considered "barnehage" food (kindergarten food). So what are your thoughts on seafood and mushrooms?

I like seafood. Love me New England clam chowder, lobster, shrimp, fish less so, but i eat it. Mushrooms are wonderful things. Put them on pizza, burgers and steak! You made me hungry and i just ate lunch!

Ugh. I want a divorce

Which makes you emotionally unstable? is it the mushrooms? I will make you a hat out of a portabella until you like them!

Both mushrooms and seafood are a tool of the devil. Just like your sudoku. Mushrooms are creepy - neither vegetable nor animal but somewhere disgustingly in between. Then there's seafood, which tastes like chemicals, shellfish which have the consistency of chewy mucus...

Just UGH!

I had a raw oyster before. It tasted like salty mucus. never again. Steamed scallops are wonderful! And no mushrooms? I am dubious of your pallet, sir!

What's wrong with my palate? I am certain you would have no issues with my cooking, just that I do not use certain ingredients :-P Besides, you have seen how disgusting seafood is raw, all you are doing is making it more solid, it would be liked cooked salty mucus. Anyway, shellfish eat fish and whale poos. And if you are what you eat...

I've been called worse...
Leave my scallops out of your name calling! They are squishy and wonderful!

It's not your scallops that interest me when it comes to food, it's your buns, not to mention the meat and two veg...

Uh-oh, here comes Jamie, time for me to run away screaming before he bitch-slaps me into the middle of next week

Ooo...you can skip Mondy and Teusday? Lucky!

I wish I could, i am covering for someone at work at the moment.

But, and this will amuse you no end, I am having a holiday in Dubai in a few days. Hopefully I wont get sick Any recommendations as to things to see and do while there?

Whoa, really? Most of it is in malls. See the mall of the emirates and dubai mall, also the souks are interesting. Do go to the mall near the Burj Al Arab. It has some nice restaurants (Meat Company). Also, Atlantis is interesting to see and walk through.

Okay, sounds good to me. Although I suspect Pete wouldn't be all that impressed by the Meat Company, given that he's vegetarian I'm actually quite looking forward to the trip.

Sssssssssssshopping!

there are a lot of high end places so be ready to deal out the cash. Some interesting souvenir shops, too but save it for the souks and BARTER THE PRICES DOWN! You can get stuff cheaper at the souks if you do this. You should get a dishdash! :D and then post photos.

I have no idea what a dishdash is... but I shall probably do a bit of a photo exposé once I am back in my LJ account or something. I am only going to be shopping for toys, not clothes and the like. But yeah, wouldn't mind checking out the souks. Although I have never been much of a barterer... what sort of % can you usually get them down by?

Don't go shouting prices of things at other stores, but maybe 25%? I'm not very good at this myself. AED are fixed to the American dollar at 3.65 or something like that. Things should be great for you if you exchange Euros :)

Gah, Norway while part of Europe isn't part of the EU, and as such it still has it's own toy currency - the Norwegian Krown (or 'kroner', NOK). But that's okay, I'm sure I'll be able to figure it out.

Though smoking is bad and I frown on it, try a sheesha. The grape is a good flavor to try. I will be curious to hear what you have to say about your trip. I found it very westernized. Do be careful when riding in the taxi's...they are nuts!

I've never smoked at all, wont I choke? A grape flavoured cigarette? How peculiar However, as they say - when in Rome...or, when in Dubai. And aren't insane taxi-drivers all part of that same wonderful experience?

They are. Watch for migrant workers crossing the 6 lane freeway trying to avoid cars to get to date trees. Also, the taxis have a female voice when the drivers speed. "Please slow down. You are speeding."
Sheeshas are not cigarets. They are large bongs. :P I have never smoked and did not cough. All in moderation, my dear.

Okay, well should the opportunity arise I might give it a go. If I die of projectile lung-cancer I shall blame you, of course. We will likely be using public transport or taxis to get to most places, so can let someone else worry about driving

Sounds good. 10 AED minimum per ride which is dirt cheap. Get to the beach at least once, mister man!

Oh yes, the idea is to go bake in the sun on at least one day. Soak up some Vitamin D and get a quick tan before coming back to the dark, cold of Norway in the winter.

Put on your sun screen and watch out for crabs!

LINCRAB1000

Yeah, I burn very quickly, damn this pasty white skin and susceptible complexion.

I dare you to put that white stuff on your nose and walk about the country :D

...why?

What would happen?

You would look funny :P

GAH!!

I'm just saying...
:D

I thought there was some important sociological reason or something. Just because it would make people laugh at me.

You, Sir, are a poop.

That made me laugh, as the kids say, "out loud." You think too much :D

So, do you giggle, or guffaw, or chuckle?

it was a dirty French man laugh followed by brie cheese and a croissant.

*baps you over the head with a string of garlic*

Dirty cheese-eating surrender monkeys.

I shall laugh like a villain while twiddling the ends of my waxed fumanchu mustache.

Ooo...maybe I should grow a handle bar mustache! As for being a dirty cheese-eating surrender monkey...I never surrender. ;)

If you do grow a handle-bar moustache, I am booking a flight over to Philly and am hiring a brush-cutter and some leather restraints. Sound like a hot date to you?
I like it when they struggle...

HAHA! I will sharpen the cheese grater just for you.

It's more of a spasm, really...

I'll bring the Gruyère and Parmesan, you bring the fondue pot and chopped vege chunks...

And bread. Need my carbs.

Should be crusty bread, or at least toasted. Nothing worse than soggy fondue bread.

But if you dare bring croûton, I will stab at thee with my fondue fork!

Only horrible Frenchie cheese-eating surrender monkeys use croûtons. Nope. Only the freshest of lightly toasted crusty bread for my fondue party.

Good man. You can have an extra glass of wine. Mind the white carpet...

I do like a good red... but then I also like a good "sticky" (dessert or ice-wine). Have you tried any of those? They can be rather delectable and not as hazardous for the carpet... apart from the stickiness.

I can count my wine encounters on two hands, but none of them were sticky (My hands are sticky from other things...) I will have to check this concoction out...

Even if you are not much of a wine person, I think you would quite like dessert wines My recommendation would be to start your exploration with a nice botrysed riesling.

booty said what now? I will check it out, sir :)

All right lady, just hand over all the chocolate bonbons and no one gets hurt....much.

First the chocolates. Then your face. HAND IT OVER

Yikes, I wouldn't want to get between a Vanguard and their Candy Bars~ >:3

Just like ET, Vanguard have a sweet tooth

Three guns seems a little excessive just to jack some candy off of people...

... but then again, according to this, Vanguards have no concept of Halloween, do they? Then the strategic observations of earth before they went down there probably yielded this report: "You guys aren't going to believe this... there are ninjas, knights, pirates, Power Rangers, wizards, Spider-Men, werewolves, Thunder Gods, Chuck Norrises, zombies, Saiyans, Jedi, Batmen, Michael Jacksons and Vikings crawling all over this planet! If you're going down there, go armed to the teeth! These earthlings are not to be lightly trifled with!"

You can never have to many guns, knives or bombs when there are so many young children running around, hopped up on vast amounts of sugar and preservatives, and armed to the teeth with eggs and toilet paper when you don't give forth with the candy-goodness.

True, true, although if going with a more subtle approach, see, that's when you become the guy who makes that whole "Razor blades hidden in the candy" myth a reality.

"TP MY house, will you?! Enjoy your internal bleeding, you little asshole!"

C'mon, razor blades are so 70's! Nowdays it's powdered glass or rat-poison. Almost impossible to trace back to you either if you're careful. Problem is though, kids have also moved on and upped the ante. TP and eggs? No, I suspect the little assholes have come up with much more unpleasant and destructive tricks.

Not in my neighbourhood. They still use TP and eggs here. Little bastards egged and TPed my car!

This is when you hide in the bushes or camp out on the roof with a paintball gun with a laser-sight and night-goggles. Take the little shits out from your hidden vantage point

Good idea! Too bad I sold my paintball gun...