Now that is one cop I would want to be incarcerated by. Mia playing dress up for somebody I'm sure. With her timid personality there is no way she'd even last a day on the force. I think I'm suppose to be cliché and talk about strip searching and handcuffs and oh, I bet she's a bad girl. But since we all already know and have read them a million times. How about I tell you guys a story instead? Might be a little boring with no moral but its a story.

So this one time I'm driving around with my best friend   StellariaTheDragon in my car not too far from my house, when suddenly I look in my rear view mirror and see flashing blue lights on behind me. Now, both Stellaria and I know WHY I'm being pulled over. See, I hadn't paid my taxes on my car in about two years. And I new that. I just never got around or cared to pay them. And being dirt poor you have to make cuts where you can. But anyway, so I pull over in a gas station and the cops pull up right behind me and box me in.

Out of the drivers side of the car steps a super cute female officer and out of the passenger side steps this old grizzled looking war veteran cop who looks like he's seen some shit. I turn my car off and roll down my window and greet the cute officer as she asks me if I know why I was pulled over. I do my very best Mark Wahlberg impression and say, "Whhhaattt? Noooooo?"

She puts her small hands on her hips, leans on one foot and tells me that my plates have been expired for a long time. I look into her blue eyes and tell her, "Ohhh mannnnnnn. Yeah, I had no idea... I'm sorry. It's just one of those things I guess I forgot to do... what with the divorce and all."

She said she was sorry to hear about the divorce. I looked up at her and said, "What? Ohhh, no no no it was my moms divorce. But I still had so much confusion. It must have just slipped my mind."

The male cop continued to walking around my vehicle. As she asks me to produce my license, registration and proof of insurance. I ask her to hold on for one moment while I get everything for her and start fumbling through the glove compartment.

Now, I know DAMN well that I don't have any proof of insurgence in my glove compartment. I'm just stalling while I think of a plan. The cute cop with her blond hair pulled back in a pony tail asks me if I have my license on me. I hand it to her and she walks back to her cruiser while I keep looking for my insurance stuff. While the two cops are running my license and I'm thinking of a plan to not go to prison Stellaria interrupts me to turn on the A/C. I was kinda in the middle of faking something at the moment, I guess if I'm going to jail Stellaria might as well not be hot in the car while they cuff me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Lord forbid. Stellaria is from the mountains of the middle of nowhere wayyyy up north and isn't use to the scorching, gates of hell like, summers that we have down in the deep south. What with her skin having the consistency and thickness on par with that of an adult walrus. So I turn the A/C on and run out of papers to pretend to look through.

Seeing that I'm now out of papers, I finally remember that I'm not a cave man and pull out my phone and start to call my insurance company to see if they could email me my proof, just when the cops come back to my door. The short cute girl hands me my license and asks if I found my insurance yet. I tell her that I'm calling them to get them to email me a copy of it so that I can show it to them. The blue eyed girl then raises her hand and says, "That's ok, I believe you. I'm just going to wright you a ticket, but as long as you pay your taxes before the date on the ticket we'll drop all charges."

I put down my phone and look up at the foxy lady and say, "Thank you miss, I really do appreciate it." If the grizzled war chief that was her partner wasn't there and if Stellaria-the-cock-blocking-dragon wasn't also there I might have asked her what she was doing when she got off work. But not also wanting to push my luck I just took the ticket and me and Stellaria went about our trip.

I did pay the taxes on my car the next week. And after two years of waiting, I had to pay a whopping $60! Feels good man. There is no moral at all to this story. I just hope that next time I get pulled over, its that same cute girl or Mia that does it.