List of Things Trina can no Longer do at PSR. 156-220

By

LordJaguar



156. When I turn blue I can no longer pretend to be a smurf.

157. When I turn purple I can no longer pretend to be a mon eater.

158. When I turn black I am not the embodiment of death.

159. When I turn green I cannot make all the plants grow because of my green thumbs.

160. When I turn yellow I can not call myself the golden kelceon.

161. Or pretend to be an award.

162. When I turn orange I can never again say “Orange you glad to see me?”

163. When I turn pink I cannot tell the boy Jr. Cadets that I am infected with cooties and that my touch is infectious.

164. I cannot keep the male Jr. Cadets prisoners in their dorms for hours on end by telling them that cootie shots don’t work.

165. I can never again attempt Tie Die. Or speak of what happened when I did.

166. When I turn gray I can no longer act really really old.

167. When I turn red I can not pretend that I’m burning up with the fires of love.

168. I can no longer do a Godzilla roar just before my battle matches.

169. Or the Godzilla walk.

170. Or the Godzilla dance after a win.

171. I am not CGI.

172. I can never again get jiggy with it during Coach Vyle’s classes.

173. Especially if Spike is also there.

174. I can not teach all 238 chatots in the biosphere to sing “It’s a Small World” in unison.

175. Or “It’s the Song that Never Ends”

176. I can no longer accidentally lock a large number of campers and counselors in the biosphere while the Chatots are singing these songs.

178. I can never sing the songs that shall not be named at camp ever again.

179. I can not dye Spike’s fur pink and glue a name tag calling him FiFi on his neck if I get angry with him for flirting with other girls. (Thanks Lost_One!)

180. I can not come out of a counseling session with a bandage on my head and a vacant look in my eyes and say the doctor made me all better in a monotone voice.

181. I can not tell the Jr. Campers that the doctors will fix them like me during checkups, and they should be happy.

182. I can not bribe a Jr. Camper to come out of the office with a bandage on her head, vacant look in her eyes, and have her say that the doctors made her all better to the other Jr. Campers.

183. After helping to catch all Jr. Campers I can not ask Director O’Shaymon if he thinks they bought it in a loud whisper after publicly apologizing to them for lying about the doctors.

184. I can not use glue as a toilet cleaner when made to do latrine duty as punishment.

185. I can no longer act surprised when somebody gets stuck to a toilet because of 184.

186. Just because the AC is out is not an excuse to do a strip tease.

187. Nor can I have my boyfriend do one either.

188. Even if he has the costume.

189. Pole dancing is not a cardio work out.

190. Not for me or the audience.

191. I cannot accuse Director O’Shaymon of weak cardio because of 189 and 190.

192. I cannot accuse my roommate, Sam Scycura, of having physic sex with her abra girlfriend just because she sweats, moans, and screams out Emily’s name at night while sleeping.

193. I cannot invite my boyfriend over to watch Sam as she sleeps.

194. I cannot offer Sam a smoke every morning and ask how good it was.

195. I cannot put on a black coat get a wagon and ask the other campers to “Bring out yer dead.” Every morning.

196. Campers sleeping because of hypnosis or sleep powder are not dead.

197. I may not sit in front of Spike during classes and give him tail tickles between his legs.

198. I now know that my tail is not meant to be used that way.

199. I cannot ask the counselors how they acquired the knowledge of 198.

200. I can no longer shout out “They will destroy us all!” when asked about the possibility of life on other planets in classes.

201. I can no longer shout “Destroy us all!” over and over all day and into the night.

202. Sam and I can not ask the bus driver “Are we there yet” over 500 times during a drive.

203. Or under 500 times.

204. When asked why I am at PSR I cannot answer because my Dad bribed them.

205. Or that I am a prisoner here.

206. Or that my father is forcing unreal expectations on me forced on by his own delusions of grander.

207. Even if 204 205 and 206 are true I am here to learn and grow.

208. I can no longer burst out laughing after saying 207.

209. I can no longer attempt to clean the toilets by using small explosives.

210. Especially if some is using the toilets when I am trying to clean them.

211. What happen to Director O’Shaymon during 209 and 210 is not funny, no matter how much the other campers think it was.

212. When told I am being sent home the proper response is not “Thank you Spaghetti God” and the Snoopy dance.

213. When told that I am staying I cannot ask the counselors how much my Dad is paying them.

214. The Omnifarious Combat Arena that will be built on camp next year is not a bribe. I cannot accuse others of lying when they say this.

215. I cannot look into the eyes of Director O’Shaymon and say “I will break you.” In a Russian accent after he tells me I am staying.

216. I cannot put up signs that say “Abandon all hope ye who enter here” all over the camp.

217. I cannot explain what Spike and I where doing in the woods to the Jr. Cadets by using their stuffed animals as puppets.

218. I cannot steal handcuffs from the defense sector for my private use.

219. I am not co-co for Coco Puffs.

220. I cannot invite hippies to form a commune in the bio dome.