You tell me we can start the rain
You tell me that we all can change
You tell me we can find something to wash the tears away
You tell me we can start the rain
You tell me that we all can change
You tell me we can find something to wash the tears away

And I know of the pain that you feel the same as me
And I dream of the rain as it falls upon the leaves
And the cracks in the ground like the cracks are in our lives
They are sealed and now far away

Iron Maiden - Rainmaker

----

Trying to kickstart my life in the right direction seems to be stalling at every attempt. It just won't fire up the way I want it to. I'm trying to just hold my head high and keep on going, but my mental illnesses are really plaguing me at the moment. Yesterday was horrible, my anxiety was in panic attack mode ALL DAY. I felt like my heart was going to explode from the palpitations and pure terror that was flowing through my mind for no reason.

Then when at my lowest, just working on redrawing all my OC's - suddenly a song comes on my Media Player and makes me feel...like I can do it. It gives me a boost, a nudge...yknow? Music is a healer, and this song has helped me many times. For so long i've lived in hatred and anger, i've been people's weapons because they made me believe that was my purpose. But now I realize I am my own free spirit, the rain will wash away the blood, ashes and dirt from my fur. I will feel better, it'll just take time. Just like the cycles of nature, good feelings and bad feelings will come and go. I need to understand that even the darkest night has a sunrise, even if its cloudy the morning after.

---