Commission for  Devlin Skunk


by: Devlin
The stench alone should make them give up, he hoped as he squeezed past the loosely chained fence bearing a red NO TRESPASSING sign. The chemical miasma over this dump only tickled his nose, but if those fucking bigots thought a skunk was too much—and he'd fucking bathed and applied deodorant, too—they'd probably quit at the gate.

Too bad. Maybe if they fucking fell into the dump, they'd mutate into the monsters they really were inside.

A muddy burble snapped his attention to a viscid pool just ahead. Among the sludgy islands of—well, he hoped they were industrial refuse since they all smelled more like a laboratory than a lavatory—a rainbow slick oozed along one mound.

Then an eye popped up from the ooze like a plum from pudding.

He may or may not have leapt back a foot and yelped.

"You scared the fuck out of me. What are you doing here?"

It didn't respond, but a thick squish popped up a second eye, which rolled over and stared.

"Good point. What am I doing here? I guess we're both alone together, huh?"

No answer, unless another tarry blurp of bubbles counted as an answer.

"I won't hurt you. I promise."

The eyes began shlurping back into the rainbow ooze.

"Wait, no, really, I won't. I don't—they all think I'm toxic, too, buddy. I get you, you know?"

One eye reopened with a gluey peeling noise.

"I could really use a friend right now."

The sludgy mass inched toward the edge of the rancid pool, waves dredging up visible mists of sharp, noxious odors. It rolled up onto the bank and collected itself into a mound, opening both of its eyes.

This close, he thought he could see the shimmer of a tear in the creature's eyes.

A wicked idea struck him. Perhaps the fumes were making him psychotic, but perhaps those fuckers had it coming all along.

"How'd you like to join me on a little adventure? Come climb up over my head.…"