I'll have to look at this later. Remind me.

Okay, i reminded you. but no rush, as long as you like it, I'm cool

Well, this wasn't really my thing, but I found it interesting.

A few criticisms: the asides you make break the flow of the story. If you're going to include them, make them seem a part of the story. Maybe having a commentary while the story goes on will seem more "natural."

Although this might be the fault of the program, make sure to properly space and align the format. It was easy to lose track of where one was really at.

It was an interesting story, but some things I had qualms with.


First, it wasn't clear what exactly the delivery boy was talking about. In othe words, I don't know what the statements are referring to.

Also, this is just a little nickpick, but the story didn't explain how the process could backfire in such a way. I know it may be hard, but making up something would have been better. Even saying that "the isotope needs time to stabilize" would explain things better. It is imaginary science.

I admit I skimmed the story (it wasn't bare skimming, so I got a lot from it), but what I saw was good. Take into consideration what I said, BUT ask others if they agree with me or not. That would be better than taking only my word.

Good job on the story overall. Even though it wasn't my thing, it did reasonably well on the subject. Again, you did do well. Keep it up and improve!

Thanks, I'll be sure to work on that kind of suff. (not sarcastic, really a sincere thank you)

Cool story. The irony and timing of the delveries was just too perfect. Keep up the good work.