After enough time the brain can forget most things. The strongest loves and joy or even the strongest loss and sadness.

I struggled for a long time with suicidal thoughts, especially after a car accident that left me stuck in my home with an abusive mother. But now I am so happy I didn't kill myself and am alive. I may still sit at home all day, but it is my own home with my fiance' and cat. I am now happier than I ever could have imagined. Of course there are still down days, where life can't contain itself or my brain can't contain itself from being negative, but it doesn't last forever. I always assumed myself too ugly or annoying to find anyone or even a purpose in life but after fighting through and actually living on it was completely worth it.

At my deepest times I did have to see a therapist and such and she did shit for helping, but the pills at least put me in a zombie state for a while. There are free options for therapy in most places- including psychiatry for the pills. I recommend it even if the therapy is boring because it gets you out of the house.

Life is hard but in the end everything ends up "okay" and "okay" is fine for me. I know my relationship may not last forever or even that family and friends will all die someday but the pain will fade and the love will fade. It's hard to see a reason when you are down and sad but it's always worth it just to see the adventure life has for you later on.

You're loved. I promise you that much.