I like the pacing and the overall arch of the story. Yes, does seem to be the beginning of something bigger, a small snippet of what looks to be a very interesting world. Do recommend starting a new paragraph everytime someone new speaks, it's not always a solid rule, but it helps readers.

Anyway, looks great, heh, sorry that it took a year for someone to respond.

For the story I borrowed details from an existing universe, just as the Chakat universe borrows stuff from the Star Trek universe.

Otherwise, I have more ideas for stories, but I'm not really a writer, especially at writing the hard (not the feel good) parts.

Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read it.