Gift art from my  Denotec after a paranoid breakdown today.

That moment when you realize your less than legitimate past wasn't a problem created by misuse of medication alone, it was created by your mind alone. I had a night of relapse into what would be considered a dangerous situation if it weren't people I loved that were the trigger. I hate being how I used to be.

And I don't want to be that way again - no matter how much I got things made clear and done. Nonviolently of course.

Being feared for a moment , has never been fulfilling as being respected for a moment.

RIP: Self Esteem.

And that's what  Denotec sensed in me. Not the paranoia - just that feeling of nobody respects you. Even if they really and truly do.

Sorry guys. We're a family, and I love you.

To passerby's and watchers: The mental conditions are simply embarrassing in most cases. But what is most embarrassing is the thought that my paranoia turned into alpha dominant aggression - which in my past has caused many to listen when things NEEDED to be done.

I am not proud.
These are not cool or funny.

It destroys people in more ways than simply their pride. And should never be taken advantage of, mimicked for attention, or taken lightly.

The real cases are frightening, especially if you're a functioning person - because you now have to live with that and rehabilitate yourself each time.
It is not easy. And it does not help you live better.

Oh, and the attention that people seem to think it gives you, does not last forever. You run a heavy risk of losing everyone you care about. People don't WANT to be around this kind of thing - it is dangerous and repetitive.

Think about it for a while. It's really sobering when you realize it.