Art by Nelson88 and his cousin, thanks to them again. Loupy seems rather annoyed that people find him cute, and as a result, they dress him in cute clothes, and even more people call him cute and that is a so embarassing circle !

They did it to cheer me up and it feel good to see that. I had fun in Switzerland and relaxed a bit but I'm still pretty sick and stressed up. I didn't slept a full night there, making nearly a week without a full night sleep. When I got home, father told me they had forgotten I was back and that they were no food for me. I took the car to get some fast good, upset, and a truck dropped a rock in front of my car but hopefully it only damaged the plastic of the front bumper but it scared me out. He stopped, I stopped behind him, got out of my car to check damage so thinking he was going to check with me, and then he fled.
I had chat wih people irl and not, but I feel bad. I can't handle social. Whenever people argue, I feel I'm responsible for it. My doctor has increased my medication, but it's the stress that is responsible he tells me. I guess I feel some guilt : a few years ago I had an accident and I had internal hemorragy to my spleen. I was in the hospital for weeks, and forbidden to work for 6 months. I told myself I should live and do stuff before I died, because it was the closest I had ever been to death, closer than during my suicide attempts. And I'm far from having scratched many lines on what I thought I should do before I die. Maybe I feel guilty for still being alive and failing over and over in my life.