I rather find this kind of nice the story flow's.
The breaks a rather nicely placed.
The only thing i like to suggest is but more breaks in like how you put in before the father spoke. For example when he go's to lyn house put like <2 hours later> or something to that effect.
I would love to see a sequel if you have one.

I'm still brainstorming about a sequel. If I get a good idea, I'll write one

Having at one time or another played five musical instruments, excluding the flute, I can understand the mental transportation, if not transformational powers of music. I love music. I hated playing it though. Or, at least I hated learning it.

Okay, enough about me. You have a good idea. I suggest that you look into a writing style guide. The mechanics are not as much fun as the story, but I tell you that it helps everyone, even the writer.

When your character was trying to figure out about the origins of the song, talking with Lyn, he gets into a rather long monologue. Try to break it up a little bit.

I suggest that you stay away from the large sections of italics. There's better ways to distinguish dream sections. :)

Good going!

Thanks for the tips. I'll go pick up some books on writing as soon as I get a chance :)

FurTopia, www.furtopia.org, has a writer's forum. Results have been mixed. :)

Writers should stick together, work together. Writing is not a dead art, even if language seems to be for a lot of people. It is just changing with the times.

That was pretty good, +fav