I've done lots of things that I have not been proud of in my lifetime. One of those things was dealing with the amount of nonsense that was thrown my way. I was never strong enough to stand up for and love myself. I always loved others, either it was my friends or if it was my relationship. Soon I began to lose interest in the very talent that was most special about myself; art. I began to lose myself in a world of fantasies, and it showed greatly in my artwork. Most of the figures were inspired by my ex girlfriend or people that I knew, but never by my manga idol Rumiko Takahashi. There was a time where I was heavily inspired by her, but I began to lose my way, and I blame the relationship that I was in, as well as my slacking. I had got myself so caught up in doing art for others and pleasing others that I forgot how to please myself. I mean I know that loving someone isn't wrong, and I know that loving friends isn't wrong either. However, I should have payed more attention to my one true love, my talent and desire to draw manga.

These days I've been looking to redefine myself. Recently, my ex has been messaging me from time to time, wondering if I still love her. While I still have love for her, I don't love her the way she expects me to love her. Those times are over. While I do not personally hate her or anything, she has done far too much to damage my life, happiness, and most importantly, my self-esteem, all for her own self-benifit. But she isn't to fully blame. I blame myself most for not being a man and standing up to it. I was boring, unfunny, and I was broke, and I understand that no one loves a boring, unfunny and broke person. Women want excitement in their lives. That's how I learned of my own feelings. I can't love because I can't stop being who I am. I'm a manga artist, and that's how it should stay. I wasn't born to be with a woman, I was born to produce comics. That's why I'm devoting my life to my one true love. Miyuki Hanjo is my love for manga in the form of manga art. She's a 35 year old lady, she's single, and she enjoys life and draws comic books herself. She lives in an apartment. She's your average citizen, but what makes her special is her reason for living; because I created her. This is why I love being a creator most. In a way, I'm a god to stories and characters, but I'm truly human, and not a souless slave to love and reality.

I promise to stay dedicated to drawing manga. I promise to never let go of the passion again. I promise to never let anything get in the way again.

I promise to keep things behind me and focus on today.