Well? Am I? Cause lately, I just don't know.

I get upset over little things. I feel like I'm overwhelmed all the time. Work just doesn't stop, there's always something new. I'm tired of having to be responsible for over 200 peoples problems. Don't like your roommate? Life got you down? Sometimes I really feel like I might just blurt out "Suck it up, lame-o. I don't care." Seriously. I'm not here to make your roommate the perfect roommate for you. Work it out.

And grow the fuck up already.

So I spent a substantial amount of money a few weeks ago to visit D for a few days. Literally I was gone from Friday morning to Monday night. And in that time I get texts from people still at work. It was 4 days people. Why can't you survive without me for 4 days? One was from one of my staff members telling me "I must never, ever go away again" and the other was a simple question from a coworker. I understand why she thought I might know the answer but even still, she could have very easily looked up the answer herself. And I also understand that she tried that and was in a time crunch, but clearly she didn't use any logic to look it up because I went straight to it. Or she could have asked the person directly. Or she could have planned better in advance. Or maybe she could have, get this, asked someone who HADN'T taken vacation and WASN'T 1500 miles away! Imagine that!

In the time that I was gone I had someone rushed to the hospital. My staff member made sure that I wanted to come home to that. It's hard enough leaving as it is, why really rub it in my face?

Yes, I confronted both of those people, and hopefully made them understand why what they did made me upset. I hope it doesn't happen again. In the meantime, a big part of why I felt I needed to leave if only for a few days was because I NEEDED that time away. I needed to feel like I had the mental break from this place. From work. From school. From everything, and I just needed a few days to truly enjoy life.

So how frustrating it was to come back and realize that that never happened.

I cried over it. I'm a natural crier, it's how I deal with stuff, so it's not that out of the ordinary. But it's two weeks later and I'm still frustrated with what happened.

So one of the days that I was with D, we had spent the day with some of his friends. One of them was also visiting everyone and so he didn't really have a place to go. He couldn't go with anyone of our other friends because, well, there are reasons, and so he ended up coming home with us. It was only for about an hour and a half. Enough time for me to straighten my hair and get ready for the game that night and relax a little. I didn't know he was coming with us though, I was looking forward to spending a little time with D just us, and just not with anyone else.

And so I was upset. But enough to make me cry? I don't know why I did but I was in his room, straightening hair and I just suddenly got so upset and couldn't help it. And then realizing that I didn't know why I was so upset made me more upset. And when he found me I told him I got really upset and I didn't know why and he just held me and told me it was okay. But I'm bothered by it because I don't know that it WAS okay. I was so upset I cried and I had no idea why.

And then today I got into this text conversation with D, and long story short, I got extremely upset because I was under the impression he was upset with and wasn't talking to me. I had just answered a question of his when he replied "Great, forget I asked...". So I tried calling him and it went to voicemail after a couple rings which usually happens when someone sends a call to voicemail. So I send a text about not talking to me now and whatnot. I get more work done, meet with a couple students, then cave in and text him again about not talking and how its making me really upset, cause really, I couldn't stop crying.

He calls and wants to know what was up with that text. And I ask him about his text. And it turns out apparently his phone changed some winking faces to ... . What he meant was, Great! Forget I asked (because I'm going to buy you a gift and I want you to forget so it's a surprise ;) ). And he never got my responding text because it went to his email. And his phone must have had poor reception because it never rang, he never saw I had called.

So everything is actually okay. I took a perfectly good moment, he was trying to be cute and thoughtful, and I pretty much bombed it. In my defense, there was no way I could have known that all those things happened though. It's crazy that those things happened which made it such a big deal but that's what happened.

So am I crazy? I got upset for no apparent reason. I was beyond ridiculous upset today. I feel like I'm going nuts.

Am I crazy? Is there something I should be concerned about? Or are these just unfortunate events mixed with my own overwhelming pressure and stress and after this year I'll be fine?

Dr. GR, thoughts?