The idea was to wait until after AC to decide if i wanted to continue being a furry... not that i dont enjoy the basic fundamentals of the fandom it's the shady, inconsiderate, and just fucked up nature that remains and forever will remain as the backstabbing and morally disturbing gossip that goes on, on a literal hourly basis in this fandom... And if that's not enough, it seems like being part of this fandom is only making my problems worse... If i had known that i was joining a group of people that use the title "Furry" as a justification for backstabbing and using people, and continuing to openly ridicule the person using bullshit and nonsense quoted from god knows how old and misconstrewed icons of the past... (i.e.) "Furry Rule #3: Don't Stick Your Dick In Crazy" [http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y48/Valflux/Forum%20Thingys/?action=view&current=Rule3.jpg]... You arrogant retarded fucks there's a difference between a one-night stand and leading someone on hardcore and then using them for all you think their worth only to use this joke and public ridicule to make them leave you alone... So this is my last journal... I'm sry i never got to meet the majority of you that i was really looking forward to meeting at some point in time but evidently this fandom takes something that i didn't see in the fine print and I can tell you right now countless others having a hard time in this fandom didn't either, how they continue forward is beyond me, but i personally have no desire to only make life harder on myself... I think i do pretty well when it comes to brushing things off my shoulder and moving on but to remain sane one must remove themselves from chaos before it gets to them... So, that's your explanation that no one cares about, and 99% of the people who bother looking at this will read... and this is the original message that some of you might briefly skim through, laugh, and move on to the latest furry drama on another page...
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Erf . . . ::sulks::
=/ that little thing called Trust is biting me in the ass again... how exactly is it supposed to fix problems again? Cuz i really feel like im doing it wrong or something...

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I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm
He came around and he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldn't be that man I adored
You don't seem to know
Or seem to care what your heart is for
Well I don't know him anymore
There's nothing where he used to lie
My conversation has run dry
That's what's going on
Nothing's fine I'm torn

I'm all out of faith
This is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed
Lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed
Into something real
I'm wide awake
And I can see
The perfect sky is torn
You're a little late
I'm already torn

So I guess the fortune teller's right
I should have seen just what was there
And not some holy light
But you crawled beneath my veins
And now I don't care
I have no luck
I don't miss it all that much
There's just so many things
That I can't touch I'm torn

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Natalie Imbruglia - Torn (Is it just me or is this song written for me, if only knowing it from when i was so little actually changed anything) =/ "Nothing's Fine, I'm Torn."

I've lost count of all the times I was left hanging and feeling like shit because someone decided to use me as a middle man while they were in the process of getting their ex back... I can't... I just can't... No one should have to go through this even once... Let alone more times than they can bare to count... UGH... ; ; What really pisses me off is that evidently even if you're cautious about the matter... the really sweet guy reassuring you that they're different... and that makes you feel so safe with them... is literally lying to your face, and instead of hugging them and holding them tight when they touch your shoulder you should be kicking them in the crotch and running for your own best interest... And i dont know, ill always be the poor sap that wants to give everyone a second chance, and wants to understand why people do the things they do... So yeah, suppose that guy was lying to themselves while misleading you like that... I'm still sitting here, confused and distraught, wondering when and if this string of jackasses ever ends, or if this is what being gay is really like...

Peace... That's what this fandom needs... While being so similar to the anime fandom the love and unity that i see in the halls of anime cons is litereally non-existant in this fandom... and the missing factor is just that... PEACE... have a nice life people...