EDIT: I wrote journal when I was really feeling down. It's a bit odd and depressed, but I was writing openly and honestly some I'm gonna leave it up.

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So... This is a weird first journal I suppose. At the time I'm writing this, this account doesn't have any content. I guess I can't say for sure it ever will... I hope it does though. This is all gonna *sound* probably very depressed, but I'm pretty sure I'm fine. Just wanna be able to say what's in my head. (I don't know if anyone will ever even read this or if I'm just writing for the idea that someone *could* read this).

I guess when I try to boil down the reason I'm writing this, it's nothing more than I'm lonely. Not a romantic relationship way at all. Just literally wanting to have have another living person to talk to. (Like I said this is probably gonna sound depressed). I guess the issue is just I don't have many friends in my daily life and even less online.

But I guess I should give you some context. I'm 22 years old. I was born in Pennsylvania, though my family moved away pretty early and I don't remember much. I grew up in southern Indiana. (I'm coming for you someday IndyFurCon). I lived there a large chunk of my life (about 14 years I believe), and now have moved to Florida in the last 4 or so years.

Now.. By some chance someone is reading this.. (Hello to you, and I'm sorry all my page has to offer to you is this.. odd, journal post. lol...) I could imagine you wondering "Your life sounds pretty normal", and you may think I actually *am* depressed (I could be) and that I'm just whining. (I probably am). Though I sorta feel there is one thing that has... not made my life.. *bad*. But has made my life *different*. I literally all my life have been homeschooled.

Now.. don't get me wrong. I know homeschoolers can have the stereotype of being weird. (Although.. I am on a furry site, so I guess I don't have to defend myself. (And that's not me trying to insult furries. I am one; and proud and happy to be so)) But I have always thought myself pretty normal by social standards; in someways I try hard to be so. Which.. is partly at blame for the loneliness. I rarely show people the whole of who I am to try to fit in, and even though I can talk with any stranger fine; i feel I am actually quite a shy person on the inside.

At this point, I can't even remember when started being a furry.. probably because I've always battled it.. I would want to fit in the world, which furries don't normally (very very rarely it seems to be).. but the world is big, and not normally kind to anyone; wether they are a furry or not.. and i'm shy enough that when I try to make friends here in the fandom... well... I just end up not.

So I'll end on this.. My profile here, and this journal, doesn't tell you much about me. I know that.. I guess that's the shy part of me either too afraid, or just not knowing how to put myself out there and meet people very well. But if reading this has given you any interest in knowing me, or even just having a passing chat about something and then we each go our own way; send me a message I guess.

Thanks for the time.
~Mr Higgs